Never Been Kissed
by hoppnhorn
Summary: Billy connects with a special girl. Rated M for Sexual Content and Language.
1. Chapter 1

Mr. Fields had forgotten his aftershave. Quinn wrinkled her nose in amusement, smelling the leftovers of something strong.

Whiskey.

And by the strength of the scent, he'd had a lot. The poor man was hungover and probably hadn't changed his shirt since yesterday. She couldn't blame him. He had the worst class in the high school. He probably needed a drink just to get into the car for work.

"So…today we're gonna recap theorems. Can anyone…anyone…tell me the fundamental theorem of Algebra?" His voice was exhausted, irritated. The lights probably made his head scream and every muttered word from his class drove him closer to self-destruct. When no one spoke up for several seconds, Quinn raised her hand and Mr. Fields let out a sigh of relief.

"Thank you, Quinn."

"Yes, thank you Squint." A second voice thundered from the back of the class and she popped her mouth closed. Billy Darley. The class bully.

"That's enough." Fields sighed. "Go ahead, Quinn." She opened her mouth, but nothing came out. She hated how much his taunts affected her. Because that's all Billy Darley was to her, a dark, sadistic voice. Not a face, not a person.

"Looks like the blind girl's gone mute." Billy snorted from the back of the classroom and suddenly the room was full of stifled laughs. Fields tried to silence them, but there was no use in his efforts. She'd heard them. She never missed a sound in that classroom.

"Billy, just go." Fields said, exasperated at last. It was only twenty minutes into the first period of the day, and he'd given up with Billy. All of his teachers had. He was a regular in detention, if he showed up that is. From what she'd heard, he'd all but stopped going to school. A sophomore, and he was already quitting.

"I thought you'd never ask." Billy growled, the scraping of a chair alerting Quinn to his movements. Footsteps on the tiled floor spoke to his size and as he passed, the warmth from the sunlight vanished from her face. His scent was light that morning, unlike previous days. The thick smell of his collogue was absent, leaving just a dark tone of smoke in his midst. She didn't care much for collogue and perfume; they were always too strong for her sensitive nose.

The swish of leather sent a gust of him back in her face and Quinn wrinkled her nose in silent protest. She didn't like smokers either; they carried their habit with them everywhere and left it in places for her to find. Like elevators or buses.

"Have a good day, Mr. Darley." Fields said sarcastically, probably eyeing the boy as he passed. "Give my regards to Betsy." Quinn hid a grin. Betsy Regan, the detention teacher. Mr. Fields had a sense of humor, but it was lost on most of his students. She, however, found him amusing. Billy didn't.

"Go fuck yourself, Fields." He growled, slamming the door behind him as he left. Sadly, that wasn't the first time Billy had directed the phrase at the teacher, and Quinn pitied him. Because it definitely wouldn't be the last.

Mr. Fields probably wished he'd stowed a bottle in his desk.

After a few moments, the room died down back to a bored silence and he sighed.

"Quinn." His voice seemed weary, but even then she heard a hopeful smile. "How about that theorem?"

* * *

><p>Unlike her classmates, she would never be able to drive. It was something she didn't miss, because she'd never experienced it. But the independence aspect was very appealing. Her classmates could pick up and take off when they liked, bumbling from the parking lot of the school in horribly maintained machines. She had to take the bus, everyday. It wasn't a terrible thing, but it irritated her that she had to share a route with middleschoolers.<p>

Talk about bad smells.

That afternoon, when the bell rang and she stepped outside into the sun, Quinn felt the surge of independence direct her away. She could walk. Her home was only ten blocks, two turns, and one intersection. It would take a half hour, and she could breathe fresh air all the way. Turning her thin cane down the sidewalk, she ignored the grumbling of bus engines and started towards home, smiling to herself.

It was a beautiful day in South Boston. The grass was pollinating, which sent a starchy, sharp smell into the air. One of her favorite scents of spring. Quinn couldn't help the smile on her face as she navigated the sidewalk on her own. Hardly anyone walked to the school so she had no company. It was just the tick of her cane on the cement and the distant buzz of traffic to fill her ears.

Halfway home, her path turned down a back alley. It wasn't a great neighborhood to walk alone in, but she was mostly left alone. Ever since birth, she'd been left out, isolated from the people who surrounded her. They didn't bother her, and she didn't bother them. So she feared nothing when she felt her way over the pitted pavement. She was halfway down the alley when a coppery smell stopped her cold.

Her shoes scuffled to a stop and she turned her head, sniffing gently to her left. An exhale. Someone was there, in the alley.

"Hello?" Her voice was shaky and feather-light, her mind praying it was an overgrown cat playing tricks on her ears. When she heard another, larger movement, she swallowed and gripped her cane, preparing to run.

Then a scent floated to her nose, dark yet faded.

"Billy?" She hesitated calling his name, but her mind thought it aloud before she could stop. Another scuffle and a deep exhale.

"How the fuck did ya know that?" His voice was like a warm blanket, wrapping her in relief. Quinn touched her throat, the pulse racing through her veins nearly choking her.

"You scared me." She whispered, panting lightly from fear. He grunted a little and Quinn loosened her grip on her cane.

"Ya didn't answer my question, Squint." He grumbled. Relaxing her stance, Quinn turned her hips to face the direction of his voice. It was considered rude to not face someone when addressing them. Then again, polite wasn't exactly Billy's game.

"I recognized your…" She hesitated. _You smell like a chimney._ "…your scent."

"My scent?" He snorted and another shuffle told her he was still a few feet away. When he fell silent, she took a small sniff and shivered.

"Do you need me to get someone?" Quinn asked gently, her free hand restlessly twitching at her side. Billy shifted on the asphalt.

"The fuck does that mean?" He growled. The tone sent goosebumps over her skin and she rubbed her exposed forearms.

"You're bleeding, aren't you?" No response, no movement. In the silence, Quinn knew he was staring, probably in disbelief. She blushed slightly, turning her head away towards the direction of home. She could just leave; offer him the same treatment he'd shown her. But the smell made her dizzy and her sympathy was growing by the second.

"How did ya know that?" He finally murmured. She shrugged.

"My nose works pretty well." It was an attempt at humor, but it was lost on the thick silence between them.

"I'm fine." Billy growled. The impulse to accept his proud defiance and leave was so strong. She wanted to flip him the bird and continue on her way, but a little voice in her back of her head chided her for such thoughts. Her parents had raised her to help those in need; and she knew what it was like to not want to ask for help.

"You're lying." Quinn whispered, brushing her short, brown hair behind an ear. "You're badly hurt."

"I'm fuckin' fine." He repeated with a warning snarl. Suddenly, his arrogance sounded like nothing but a smoke screen, and she saw right through it.

"You're not breathing very deeply, probably a broken rib or two, and there's enough blood for me to smell, so I'm pretty sure you're not fine." The outburst quickly made her unwilling to wait in the alley. So she huffed a final breath and turned her cane towards home. "But have it your way." She muttered, quickly starting down the alley. Each step calmed her racing heart and in a few steps, the frown on her face relaxed into indifference. Her duty had been done; she'd offered a hand to the biggest jerk in Stokely. In her mind, she was a saint.

A scuffle caught her attention and she slammed to a halt.

"Are you following me?" She asked quietly, staring straight ahead. No response. "I know you're there, Billy. You smell." The jab worked and his voice grumbled from behind her.

"Fuck you." He was much closer than she'd anticipated. Whirling, she reached out with a hand and ended up smacking something hard. "JESUS!" He roared, his voice moving away.

"Sorry!" She stretched out her hand and groped the air. "Oh gosh, I'm sorry." A series of wheezes and groans told her she'd probably smacked his chest. Quinn moved cautiously towards the sounds, trying to keep her movements slow and soft. "Billy?"

"Fuck." He ground out, his voice originating from below her. In her mind, she pictured him, hunched over and holding his ribs.

"I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to—"

"Just shut up, okay?" Billy snapped, air wheezing from his lungs. "Christ." Reaching out carefully, her hand touched something cold. Leather. His wheezing softened and Quinn trailed her fingers over the jacket towards his shoulder. It took a long time. His torso was huge, much larger than she'd expected, and his back was hard underneath the smooth jacket. Her image of Billy shifted in her mind, painting a more elaborate picture.

"What are ya doin'?" He grunted. Her hand vanished.

"I was placing you so I don't hit you again." Billy huffed a breath from his nose, but said nothing, straightening to block the sun from her eyes. Quinn itched to touch his face, to read the stare he was definitely giving her. "You need to see a doctor." She said softly.

"I'll be fine." His retort was weaker than the last and Quinn smirked a little. Even big Billy Darley felt pain.

"If you say so." She said it gently, not as a challenge, and turned her cane down the alley once again. This time she only made it four steps before she heard him following.

"Ya live this way?" He grunted, scuffling obviously to her side. Hiding a smile, she nodded.

"Just a few blocks north." His silence made the walk strange, but she read between the lines. Another gift from her acute senses was her ability to feel emotions. She could feel people without having to see their faces. Billy needed her help, but he didn't want to ask for it. "You live on the west side, right?" Quinn forced him back into the conversation.

"Yeah." This made her chew a cheek in thought. He was on the east side of Stokely when he had very little reason to be. Not only that, but he had been beaten. What had he gotten himself into?

"Wanna call for a ride?" She asked meekly.

"Ya got a cell?" He responded quickly, giving away the fact that he, indeed, needed to call someone. Quinn shook her head.

"No, but you can use my house phone." He didn't say anything for a while and she took the silence as proud acceptance. When they emerged from the end of the alley, Billy moved closer to her, shadowing her left shoulder.

"Ya cut through that alley everyday?" He grunted suddenly. Quinn frowned a little and turned her head in his direction.

"No." A few paces of quiet filled the time before he responded.

"What if it hadn't been me?" She chewed on a lip, honestly wondering the same question. While she didn't like Billy, she wasn't afraid of him causing her bodily harm. In that sense, she was lucky it had been him.

"I can defend myself." Quinn settled on that response with a small nod, pushing her shoulders back in a show of self-worth. Billy snorted.

"With your stick?" She frowned in his direction.

"I'm blind Billy, not helpless." Taking a small breath to calm herself, she tried to support her retort. "I was born here too." She muttered, unsatisfied with her own argument.

"Really?" His voice sounded genuinely surprised, innocently so and she smiled.

"Yeah, I just went to a special school for a while." The word 'special' caught in her throat and she blushed a little. She'd gone to a school on the other side of Boston to learn to read brail and receive one on one instruction. It was expensive, however, and her parents were eventually forced to send her to public high school. Billy didn't comment on her past any further and she didn't mind the silence as they made their way down the block. They were almost to her house when she starting wondering what they looked like. Short and skinny Quinn and tall, mean Billy Darley. The picture made her grin.

"What?" He muttered. She shook her head.

"Nothing. Anyone watching us?"

"No." He grunted back. Quinn nodded and her cane revealed a lip in the sidewalk. They were four houses down.

"How bad is your face?" She asked quietly, turning her head a little in his direction. Billy didn't answer for a few moments, the sound of his stride the only clue he was still there.

"How do ya do that?" He grumbled after a while. Quinn smiled and turned her face towards the ground.

"The way you're talking. I can just tell." A swishing sound sent a wave of his scent in her direction and she found herself growing used to it.

"Fuckin' creepy." Billy muttered. When she stepped up a driveway without warning, he caught up in a couple of long strides, his leather jacket twisting around his torso. Quinn guided them up the short drive, up the porch, and unlocked the front door without even a moment of hesitation. The door opened quietly and she stepped inside, taking a deep breath of the familiar smell. Home.

"Nobody will be home until later, my parent's are working." She stated, setting her backpack on the bottom step. Billy remained in the doorway, his shadow casted long across her face. "The phone's in the kitchen." Quinn added, starting down the small hall to the back of the house. The door thudded closed and his boots eventually clomped after her, but she was working to look unfazed by his presence. Once he was in the room, the phone came off the hook and she vanished into the back bathroom, leaving him with a bit of privacy.

She didn't know much about Billy Darley, but she knew he was involved with illegal things, and bad people. The rumors at school were just the foundation of her suspicions. There were definitely things that went untold. And she didn't want tangled up in any of it.

His voice was deep and gravelly, even through a wall, and she memorized his bass. He was speaking to someone important. His tone was lowered, dull, and he wasn't annunciating as harshly as usual. All of this she gathered without comprehending a word of his conversation. What she did comprehend was Billy's respect to whomever he'd just called. When he was done, she reappeared with a washcloth and some Neosporin in hand.

"You get a ride?" She asked casually, sitting in a kitchen chair.

"Yeah." Then she held out the cloth and he moved closer. "What?"

"For your face." Quinn said matter-of-factly. "You should clean up any cuts."

"There aren't any cuts on my face." He grumbled. Reading between the lines, she continued to hold it out in front of her.

"What about your ribs?" Billy didn't move to take the washcloth so Quinn sighed and dropped it on the table. "Fine." After spending a little time with him, she was starting to realize he was all pride.

"Why do ya care?" He grunted. Quinn shrugged and stood, circling him and heading towards the living room.

"Because you reek of iron." She sunk into the couch and grabbed a book off the coffee table, opening it to her bookmark. As she started to drag her fingers across the page, Billy stepped onto the carpet. In the quiet, she pretended to be reading when really she was listening. He slowly circled the room, looking at the photos maybe, and then he passed her to sit on the couch. When he moved by, she caught a whiff of soap. He'd used the washcloth.

Fingers frozen on the page, she turned her head towards him.

"Does it hurt?" He sniffed and his scent drifted to her in a light wave.

"Not really." She closed her book slowly and set it down.

"What happened?" She didn't want to pry, but she was curious. He had always been the meanest, toughest one in class. How could someone be worse than him?

"Don't worry about it." He growled. It was what she'd expected and she didn't mind. In fact, her fear of him had faded considerably.

"I just—" She shrugged off the end of the sentence and picked up her book once again.

"Just what?" Billy grunted. Quinn, hands folded on her book, directed her face towards his voice.

"I just can't imagine." Obviously, her answer wasn't what he expected so he didn't respond for a long time, an awkward silence surrounding them.

"Ya can't imagine what?"

"I've never felt an injury like that." Billy snorted.

"Ya, cuz no one's gonna hit a blind chick." Quinn shook her head.

"Well no. But I've never…" She held up her hands and touched her own face. "…felt that." Then she dropped her hands and shrugged. "I don't even know what you look like." Billy chuckled and instantly groaned, adjusting his position on the couch.

"Isn't that what blind means?" Shaking her head, she opened her book again.

"Nevermind." He sighed and his scent washed over her. It was dark, but something about it left a sweet taste in her nose.

"You sayin' you can see shit?" Quinn ignored him, trying to focus on the page beneath her fingers. "Hey, I know ya aren't deaf." She gave an exasperated sigh and motioned to her page.

"I look at things the same way I read. Touch." He seemed to mull this over with a few moments of silence.

"You wanna touch my face, that it?" Quinn clamped her eyes closed and pressed the pads of her fingers onto the page in determination.

"No." He laughed lightly through his nose.

"Yeah ya do. Ya wanna know what I look like." She shook her head, ignoring him with all the focus she could muster. Quinn wasn't stupid; she'd heard what girls said about Billy Darley. Most of the comments were useless, but some had made her wonder. She knew he had blond hair, but she didn't know what blond looked like. She also knew he had blue eyes, again, not useful. But someone had said ripped abs once, and Quinn blushed as she recalled the girl's tone. She'd never felt "ripped" abs, but when she'd heard the breathy whine that had accompanied the description, she wanted to.

"I know enough." She said evenly, turning a page she hadn't read.

"Really? What have you heard?" He shifted closer, a smirk evident in his voice.

"Blond hair, blue eyes, that sort of thing." Quinn said quickly with a shrug. "It doesn't make much of a difference to me."

"That's it?" _No._ She'd heard about him in other ways as well. Unfortunately, those things had nothing to do with sight. When she didn't answer him, he shifted and Quinn froze. His smell was suddenly very close and her body tingled, unable to move. "Take a look then." His mouth couldn't have been more than a few inches from her own and she bolted backwards on the sofa. Billy purred a small laugh and Quinn blushed six shades of red before she finally gave in and set down the book.

"Hold still." With both hands, she reached out and fished for his face, fingers shaking slightly as they hung in the air. Suddenly a hand clamped around her left wrist and she gasped. But he said nothing, leading her with a small pull.

The first things she felt were his cheeks. They were rough with short stubble and she dragged her fingers over it gently, feeling how the hair was fine and smooth, hardly a man's beard. Then she moved up, climbing over his high cheekbones and into his sideburns. They were shaggy and unkempt and she felt his hair was pulled tight to his head.

"You have long hair." Quinn said softly, grinning to herself. "A ponytail."

"So what?" He growled. His jaw moved near her right wrist and she flinched, remembering whom she was looking at.

"Just an observation." She added, running her hands upward to his forehead and feeling the smooth, young skin that ran down to his eyebrows. With her thumbs, she traced the length of his nose and parted them to slope back down to his cheeks. "And a strong face." As she flattened her fingers to touch his eyes, his hands grabbed her wrists.

"No." She nodded, understanding that she'd reached a painful area. It made her cringe inside, knowing someone had hit him in the eye. When he released her, she moved down his cheeks once more, sweeping her fingers together to find his…

Quinn dropped her hands.

"So now I know." Hands sweating, she reached for her book, only to have her right hand snatched away. Billy didn't say a word, but guided her palm back to his face.

Her thumb landed on his chin and he guided her higher, the sensitive tip of her finger running over his warm, soft lips. The rest of her fingers fanned out over the space and she felt heat swelling on the top left of his mouth.

"Your lip is swollen." Quinn whispered. "Does it hurt?" Billy exhaled from his nose, the air moving over her fingers like a caress.

"No." Her body shivered when his voice vibrated over her fingers, but she didn't stop her study, curiosity urging her forward. Her thumb lowered to his bottom lip and she swept along its width, the prickle of hair teasing from below.

She could see him. In her mind, a shape had formed. It was a good face, very symmetrical, and she knew she wouldn't be able to shake the image from her mind. Distracted by her thoughts, it took Quinn a moment to realize Billy had parted his lips. Warm breath hit the side of her palm and she found her heart racing, breath starting to rush from her lungs. Her head filled with the other things she'd heard about Billy Darley and Quinn's cheeks burned in recollection.

"_He's an animal in the sack." "Best kisser, ever." "He could seduce a nun." _

"You're blushin'." He purred, his lips moving under her hand. Retracting the palm, she shook away the thoughts in her head. Groping the couch behind her, she fished for the book she knew was nearby. It was her shield, something to distract her hands. "You touch a guy before?" Quinn frowned and scooted away, grateful for the defensive feelings bubbling inside her. Honestly, she'd only ever felt a couple of men, and they'd all been instructors or other blind people. They were nothing like Billy Darley.

"Yes, a few." She said, pushing her hair behind her ear. Her hand landed on the spine of her book and she felt relief spread through her veins.

Then his hand was on her cheek. Quinn froze and blinked, her heart screaming in her chest.

"Ya blush for all of 'em?" His hand pulled her back, brought her closer, and her mind became a pile of slush.

"I wasn't blushing." She whispered, out of breath in a matter of syllables.

"Yeah, ya were. What were ya thinkin' about?" He purred. Her senses were on full alert. She could feel his fingers on her cheek, his second hand teasing the edge of her knee. His breath grazed her cheek and Quinn swallowed, heart pounding inside of her chest.

"I was just feeling." She murmured. Billy swept a thumb over her cheekbone.

"Do ya wanna taste?" Her throat closed and no words were allowed to follow. Thankfully, he didn't wait for an answer. His lips grazed her own and Quinn let out a small sigh. Then, with a hand pressed to her back, he kissed her. Her first kiss, and it was with Billy Darley. If someone had told her she'd be kissing Billy before dinner, she would have called them crazy. That's what it was: crazy.

Crazy good. His mouth was surprisingly soft, and tasted sweet yet also a little salty, like untouched skin. Every nerve in her body was aflame. Burning even.

She needed to breathe.

When they parted, she was panting, completely stunned. His mouth moved to her ear and she shivered in anticipation.

"See you 'round, Squint." He moved quickly, rising from the couch and striding from the room. She didn't chase him, or even offer a 'goodbye'. Quinn was frozen on that couch, reeling from the feelings stirring inside her. Only after she heard the front door close and a car speed away did her mind finally catch up.

"See you."

* * *

><p><strong>I'd love to hear from you! Everyone reads things differently and it only leads to greatness. Ideasinspiration/improvements can come from anything. **

**Does my idea of Billy differ from yours? **

**What would you like to read next from me? I'm open to ideas, always. :) **


	2. Chapter 2

**I was…encouraged…to continue this. Hope you enjoy. :)**

* * *

><p><em>Can't explain what's come over me, come over me<br>Can't explain why it's so hard for me, so hard to see your side_

* * *

><p>Lockers rooms were the worst room in the school, for two reasons.<p>

First, the smells. Everything from body odor to bad breath would congeal in the very walls of the gym locker room. And Quinn could smell every single one of them. She could even tell which were new.

Second, the girls.

You would think being blind would award consideration. But that wasn't the case with high school girls. They seemed to be even more ruthless, whispering passive insults loud enough to be heard. Everyone knew that, despite her sight, she had fantastic hearing. So their words only stung harder.

She had learned to let the insults roll off her back.

But it didn't mean she didn't hear them.

Slipping her shirt over her head, she kept the garment close to hide her chest. She had never seen her own body, but she knew to keep it hidden. And she knew it wasn't perfect. The title of _"tater-tits" _had alerted her to that at the beginning of the semester. Swapping her gym shirt for her top was quick, the stiff cotton shirt contrasting sharply to the soft, home laundered one of her own.

"LADIES! Two minutes!" The teacher's voice boomed from the entrance and the girls went quiet momentarily until the door shut once again. Then the roar was back, consuming her every thought.

"But then I heard that she went over to Ronnie Jones' house and didn't leave until the next morning." Quinn listened absent-mindedly, happy that the conversation wasn't about her today.

"Isn't she dating Bobby?" The dialogue was scattered around the room, girls joining in at random. The names didn't matter; they were all the same in the head. They all had the same useless gossip bouncing around their brains.

"Ya, last I heard."

"Shit, she's such a dirty slut." Laughs broke out and Quinn flinched, the sounds busting her ears like snare drums.

"Speaking of slut…" Their voices gathered closer, as if they were trying to keep their conversation hidden despite the acoustics. "…I heard that Trina Adams had sex with Billy Darley at that party on Saturday." There were a few shocked inhales, followed by tiny giggles. It wasn't surprising, really, that Billy had slept with someone. But Quinn's face lit up like a flame regardless.

Hiding her blush, she ducked into the small locker and caught her breath. It had been a few weeks since she'd discovered him in the alley, but the afternoon's events had been on her mind everyday since.

It didn't seem real that he'd been in her living room. That he'd let her touch his face. That he had trusted her.

Kissed her.

"If sleepin' with Billy makes you a slut, half the senior class are sluts." One girl giggled.

"Well then I guess that makes me a slut…" A chorus of gasps and giggles made Quinn close her eyes. It made her feel dirty, losing her first kiss to Billy Darley. It wasn't as sacred as her virginity, but it still put a lump in her gut. More so because she'd enjoyed it.

She had even dreamt about it.

His lips were burned into her memory and she could remember how he tasted. And it made her sick. She didn't want to remember those things.

"What's her deal?" The words were so quiet she'd barely heard them. But the whisper drifted to her ears and Quinn immediately knew who they were talking about. Her.

"She's all red." Closing her locker, Quinn took her cane and made her way to the exit. The gym floor would be loud, blocking out all comprehensive conversation. That was the ultimate peace: so much noise she couldn't untangle the snide comments.

It didn't make much sense that she even had to go to gym. She couldn't play the games; she couldn't participate with the others. But the teacher had tried to solve the problem, tying a volleyball net at waist height to one set of bleachers. Then he'd strung it across the room to the other side. And Quinn ran. One hand on the taunt lead, she would run along the net, thinking about nothing. On the plus side, it was exercise. But it made her feel utterly alone.

The net was rough. It felt endless as it unwound under her palm. The running made her sweat and pant, but it also gave her time to think. And lately, she'd had plenty on her mind.

They wanted to accelerate her graduation. The principle and several of her teachers had told her parents she was far above a sophomore's education level, that she needed to be bumped up. They'd been proud of her, but also hesitant. She was already different; her parents knew skipping a grade would only single her out further. Since then, it had weighed on her.

The sounds of the gym and the buzzing in her brain had taken her away from that net. And then suddenly she was back again, slamming head on into a wall. But it wasn't a wall.

Quinn cried out, her hand leaving the net to reach out for the floor. But her hands never touched the cold hardwood. Someone was clutching her forearms, keeping her upright.

"Jesus, Squint. Watch where ya goin'." Billy's voice was quiet; He wasn't ridiculing her aloud like usual. Opening her mouth, Quinn fished for a response, her feet slowly finding balance once again.

"Mr. Darley, can I help you with something?" The gym teacher interrupted the chaos of the class chatter, the large room lulling into silence. Billy released Quinn's arms and his shoes moved away, into the middle of the court.

"No." He grunted in response, walking in the direction of the second exit. It was common for the tougher kids to hang out behind the school, but only Billy was bold enough to walk through a class to do so. The teacher didn't have anything to retort, so the class murmured for a moment, suspended in stunned reverence until the exit door squeaked open. When it slammed shut, the girls were humming.

Quinn's face was on fire, her arm's tingling from where he'd been holding them. He'd stepped right into her path, blatantly. And that meant something to her. Not only that, but she'd run straight into him. She recalled her face bouncing hard and couldn't believe it had been his body. Her cheeks were still ringing from the contact and she rubbed them unconsciously.

Billy had gone from being on her mind to in her way.

* * *

><p>At night, people go to sleep. And in it's own way, so does the city. Not just the chatter of the streets or the roar of traffic, but everything. The sun sets, the temperature drops, the animals hush, and the air holds its breath. Everything sleeps, even if it's for just a moment.<p>

For someone cursed with extensive hearing, the night is a relief. Quinn found solace in those serene blank evenings. When her parents were long asleep, she would crawl out of bed and sneak out onto the back stoop. There, in the light chill, she would listen. Eyes closed, smile on her face, she would just sit.

The habit had become a ritual. She couldn't sleep without a minute on that stoop. Her mind wouldn't unwind and allow her peace. So she found herself there every night.

Everything is calm at night.

Normally.

That night it was quiet until Quinn picked up on sirens. They were faint, and nearly missed, but they were there, blaring their endless wails into the quiet streets. She frowned, confused by the intrusion of such a harsh sound. But her irritation was brief. The patter of heavy footsteps broke through, alerting her to someone running. Fast.

Jumping fences towards her yard.

She wanted to hide, but her body froze with fear. Her mind scrambled, telling her to stay still. Maybe if she didn't move, whoever was sprinting in her direction would miss her altogether and continue on, unaware of her presence. But her logic told her that was impossible. Her house sat on pathetic patch of grass. She'd been in bathroom stalls that were larger. Whoever was barreling straight at her would definitely see her, and she was a sitting duck.

A blind sitting duck.

But her moment of escape had passed, and Quinn clutched her knees as the footsteps arrived at her neighbor's yard. A swish of denim and a thud of feet followed, and the runner was standing in her backyard.

Then he wasn't moving anymore.

Quinn wanted to say something, something to toughen her up. There were many things she could say. But none of them would come out of her mouth. All she could muster was a dry swallow, and shaking exhales.

The stranger panted for a moment, then snorted.

"The fuck are ya doin' outside at one in the mornin'?" Quinn gave an audible sigh of relief.

"God." She whispered, covering her forehead with a hand. "Billy." He gave another quick snort, sniffles punctuating his light panting.

"Ya didn't answer the question, Squint." She relinquished a small smile, her heart still pounding in her chest.

"You have no right to ask me what I'm doing in my own yard." She said gently, standing carefully from her seated position. "If anything, you owe me an explanation." Billy snorted a third time, his boots shuffling closer.

"None of your business." He replied; the rubbing of denim put him only a few feet away. He had no problem getting near her now. That was obvious. Shaking her head, Quinn gestured to her right, in the direction of the faint police sirens.

"Something to do with the cops…" Billy gave a light laugh.

"Whatever. I was bored of that party anyway." Quinn nodded, feigning understanding. But she had no clue; she wished she did. The only parties she'd gone to were the birthday parties with her family. She had never gone to a high school house party.

"What?" Billy interrupted her thoughts, bringing her back to the present. Shaking her head, she cleared her face of emotion.

"Why were the cops at your party?" Billy gave her a deeper laugh. Then there was the flick of a lighter and Quinn wrinkled her nose. Of course he was smoking.

"Wasn't my party, Squint. I don't throw the parties, I just show up." She nodded again, realizing she'd heard plenty of stories about Billy showing up at parties. But she'd never heard anything about Billy throwing one. "Some fuckin' idiot threw one because his parent's were outta town." He added, exhaling deeply and casting a cloud of smoke into the air. The smell didn't immediately hit her, but it crept over to her nose eventually, the scent familiar. It was his scent. Instead of bothering her, Quinn was surprised that she didn't mind it.

"Anyway, goddamn neighbors called the cops." He finished, hissing the rest of the smoke angrily through his lips. "And Bones'd kick my ass for somethin' that stupid." Quinn frowned at the name.

"Bones?" Billy said nothing for a moment, as if he'd given something away, then he took a drag, the end of the cigarette crinkling in the silence.

"My old man." He said softly, sighing the smoke out. Quinn nodded, rubbing her arms. It wasn't cold outside, but she was getting more and more self-conscious. She was wearing nothing but a t-shirt and shorts, leaving very little barrier between her and Billy's eyes. It reminded her of slamming into him in the gym. Every inch of her body had been pressed to him. It was only for a split second, but it had been the closest she'd ever been to another person. Especially a person of the opposite sex.

And that thought made her cheeks flush with warmth.

"What?" Billy asked again, his tone going from passive to aggressive in a heartbeat. Quinn shrugged.

"It's a weird name." Taking another drag, he seemed to watch her. It made her uncomfortable, standing in front of him with nothing to say.

"It's just a name." He replied eventually. "Names don't mean shit." Crossing her arms, Quinn took a hesitant step down off of the stoop. She didn't want to fall in front of Billy Darley.

"Then why do you insist on calling me Squint?" She asked pointedly, tilting her face up to where she imaged his to be. When he exhaled, his breath passed her cheek and she turned away. No matter how hard she tried, she couldn't shake the memory of his breath brushing over her fingers.

"What, does it hurt you're feelings?" He teased with a purr, sucking on the end of his smoke. Quinn shrugged her crossed arms.

"It's stupid." Her reply must have shocked him, because Billy didn't move for a moment, his entire presence silent. Then he lowered his cigarette, leaning into her.

"I like it." He murmured, his words ghosting over her temple. Taking a step back, Quinn looked up into his face again.

"I don't squint." His shirt moved in what she assumed was a shrug.

"So?"

"So…it's stupid." He didn't respond, hissing smoke into the air. A long awkward silence passed between them and Quinn started to worry about what he was thinking. What was he looking at as he stood a few feet from her? Shaking her head, she quickly leapt to a new topic. "So what was wrong with the party?" She chewed the inside of her lip, turning her head towards the sirens. Their volume had decreased, but the sound still remained in the distance.

"Bunch of freshman, barely any booze. Put the pieces together." Billy murmured in response, moving around her towards the step. Quinn listened to him settle on the stoop, his boots grinding the small pebbles on the ground.

"So you can't have fun unless you're drunk?" She asked with a mutter. Crossing her arms, she fought off a small breeze. Billy said nothing for a moment then he exhaled smoke in her direction.

"I don't get drunk, Squint."

"Stop calling me that." Her words weren't angry, but irritated, quiet in the still air.

"No." He laughed back. Turning her head around, Quinn faced him and dropped her arms.

"Why are you still in my yard?" She asked, a little angrier. His laugh floated over the sirens, deep and smooth.

"Because you're talkin' to me." He took a drag and breathed quietly, probably smirking at her from the stoop. Quinn continued to chew her lip, hating him for acting this way. She wondered why he was being so nice to her. It was a big change from teasing her in class.

"Why did you run?" She asked. Billy stood again, his movements casting warmth across her bare forearms as he neared.

"That's a stupid question." She cocked her head, moving a little closer.

"People say you deal. Is that why you ran?" His lack of reply made her insides squirm. If she wasn't careful, she could cross the threshold from nuisance to liability. But, to her surprise, Billy grunted a laugh.

"I'm not a dealer." Her throat closed a little, disappointment lingering with fear. Turning away, she wished she had her cane. "What's that face?" He demanded suddenly, his voice stern but gentle.

"Nothing." She murmured, padding barefoot across the grass. Taking small steps, she felt her way across the lumpy ground.

"Cough it up, Quinn." He ordered, appearing in her path. When he said her name, a small shiver whispered over her back. It gave her enough courage to tilt her head towards his face.

"You're lying." Billy didn't budge.

"Prove it." Crossing her arms, she inched to her right, the grass tickling the bottoms of her feet.

"Your tone was too high." He followed her lead, blocking her again.

"Ok, Detective. Anything else?" She wrinkled her forehead.

"What?"

"Ya can't prove shit with my voice." Her face slackened in understanding and she shrugged lightly.

"You're right." Then she stepped away, kicking the ground lightly as she went. "But you asked." Billy didn't move and Quinn wandered further.

"Don't figure ya for a rat." He murmured and she smiled a little, turning around to walk back.

"So I was right?" She could practically feel his eyes roll.

"I didn't say that." Smiling larger, she made her way back to the stoop.

"You didn't have to." Then he surprised her again, sitting next to her. The little stair wasn't very wide, so his body was touching hers, denim pressing into her left knee and his arm hair tickling her own. Quinn had to hold back a shiver. The last time he'd been that close, they'd kissed; and she couldn't help but recall the wonderful feelings he'd evoked with his soft mouth.

"It's kinda freaky, ya know." Billy murmured, hissing smoke between his lips into the sky. "The way you can tell things. Things even…" As he trailed off, she blushed.

"Seeing people can't see." They were quiet for a moment, then Billy moved, his body shifting against her. When he spoke again, Quinn realized he'd turned to face her completely.

"Do it." She blinked, turning her head to face his thick bass.

"Do what?" His scent wafted around her in a wild gesture.

"Your little trick." Quinn shook her head, leaning her elbows on her knees.

"I'm not a sideshow act, Billy." He made a groaning sound then sucked harshly on his cigarette.

"I didn't say that, you did." When she didn't respond, his stare started to burn into her temple. The longer he stared, the weaker she became. He was almost playful now, waiting for her to amaze him with her tuned senses.

"You've been drinking." She murmured, tracing the bone in her knee with a finger. Billy remained silent and Quinn took the quiet as an order for more. "Rum, not beer. And you stepped in dog poop when you were jumping fences. He quickly shifted on the step and made a grumbling sound, scraping his boot across the ground. With a small laugh, Quinn listened to him fidget.

"You bought gas recently, your shirt smells like the fumes." Billy held still, sniffing lightly as he confirmed her statement.

"Jesus." He murmured. "You're good." Blushing a little, she crossed her arms over her knees and propped her chin on the perch.

"And I don't think you've slept in a while." That statement left Billy speechless, his breath freezing in his chest. "Plus you're hungry." Quinn barely whispered the final words, her neck burning with a nervous blush. She'd pushed the boundary, and she didn't know how he'd react.

"Fuckin' creepy." Billy whispered. He smoked in silence and Quinn said nothing, listening to the night around them. "I haven't seen my bed in two days." A lump formed in her throat as Billy gently continued. "What gave it away?" She swallowed the lump and hugged her knees closer.

"I don't know. Your breathing, the way you move, your voice." She shrugged. "You sound tired."

"Thanks." Facing Billy, Quinn leant a cheek on her forearm.

"And you smell like…" She sniffed for effect and grinned. "Dollar store perfume." Billy snorted and suddenly he was close again, his scent floating up her nose.

"It was a boring party. Didn't mean I wasn't partying." A smirk was evident in his tone, but Quinn took it in stride. "Nothing happened." He punctuated suddenly, almost sighing the words. She hid the warmth that spread in her stomach.

"I really didn't need to know." As she spoke, a small breeze alerted her to Billy moving away from the stoop. He quickly stood without making a sound. Lifting her head from her arms, she listened as he backed away towards the gate.

"But ya wanted to ask." Quinn wrinkled her nose and shook her head.

"Did not." Expecting a retort, she waited, grinning at the back gate. But no answer came and the expression slowly faded. Focusing her hearing, she called out in the dark. "Billy?" Not a sound.

He was gone.

* * *

><p><strong>Yup. Thoughts?<strong>

**Love to my readers and my reviewers. You guys are amazing. **


	3. Chapter 3

**Ok, I officially dedicate this chapter to Leeseelee, because she completely inspired the last one and encouraged me for another. Thank you m'dear.**  
><strong>Many many thanks to my reviewers! ~MissSweetWoman, anon, xoShortee93, and of course leeseelee~ Love you guys bunches.<strong>

**Enjoy!**

* * *

><p><em>I'm in like with<em> _you_  
><em> Not in love with you quite yet<em>  
><em> My heart's beginning to<em>  
><em> Slightly overrule my head<em>_  
><em>

* * *

><p>Bethany Franks was a living artifact. Her voice shook with every raspy breath and her feet seemed to scuttle across the floor. Everything she did was noisy. It soothed Quinn to an extent. She knew where the older teacher lurked at all times.<p>

And currently, she was wandering down the hall.

"Miss Smith, why aren't you in the lunch room with the others?" Quinn smiled pleasantly and closed her book, careful to keep her fingertips tucked inside on her place. It was a romance novel, a new read for her. She'd never considered flighty stories worth her time before, but it was cathartic now. A reservoir of curiosity had been tapped by the heated and colorful descriptions. Her heart would race and her face would flush. And it kept her busy.

So she didn't have to think about Billy Darley.

She could think about Peter the rebellious soldier or Cameron the heroic knight. Those were men she was comfortable daydreaming about in the middle of the afternoon.

"It's hard to read in there." Quinn answered softly, placing her second hand on the smooth book cover. Mrs. Franks shuffled closer, her exhales hissing from her nostrils.

"You can't sit out in the hallway, my dear. You need to be in the cafeteria." Quinn nodded, bracing her hand on the cold tile floor to push herself to her feet.

"Bethany, I told her she could sit out here." The neat clicking of shoes and swish of pants announced the presence of another teacher. Her favorite teacher, Mr. Fields.

"She has a hard time reading when it's loud." Quinn slowly stood, tilting her head to listen as Mr. Fields came to stop at her side. He had been in a good mood that day, noticing how her forehead would crease when the other students would get too loud in the cafeteria. He'd come over and asked her about her book of choice. Thankfully, the Braille versions of her romance novels didn't come with cover art. She'd told him they were mysteries.

"Arthur, she can't be out here without a pass." Ms. Franks was always finding problems, even when they didn't exist. Quinn just wanted to read, but that was proving to be an issue no matter where she went.

"Then could she have a pass to go to the library?" He replied politely, but his exhales hinted towards his frustration with the older woman. There were many things he probably wanted to say, things not nearly as gentle.

After a few beats of heavy breathing, Ms. Franks' shaky hands fumbled with a pad of paper and Quinn turned her head to Mr. Fields. It was a pity he had to be a teacher to so many students who didn't appreciate him. Giving him a smile, she knew he would return it.

"Thanks." She said softly, taking the pass when the elderly woman ripped it off her pad. Mr. Fields' palm patted her back and he started away, back to the cafeteria full of screaming students.

"Enjoy your book, but don't be late to math." Quinn nodded and waited until Ms. Franks had scuttled off around the corner. Then, in complete quiet again, she took out her cane and started for the library.

* * *

><p>The first few days of public school had been very difficult for Quinn. Someone had guided her around the halls at first, but even the simplest of instructions were very stressful for her to follow. The building was like an endless maze of halls and doors. But, after a year of trial and error, Quinn knew that building like the back of her hand. Between classes, when no students wandered the halls, she could even go without her cane.<p>

Holding it loosely in her right hand, she barely swung it back and forth as she walked to the library. It was utterly silent except for the muffled classroom noise.

"Squint!" His voice blasted in her ears like a gunshot and Quinn nearly toppled over, bracing herself against a wall of lockers as her heart took off in her chest. He chuckled as she righted herself in a bolt, embarrassment burning in her cheeks.

"Did I sneak up on ya?" Billy Darley's voice sounded more unique every time she heard it. No one even remotely emulated him. There was only one bass like his, and she thoroughly hated how much she loved it. Unable to think up a proper retort, she bit down on her jaw and pushed forward to the library. He was still a fair distance away, clomping his big boots in her direction. "I know you can hear me"

"What do you want?" She murmured over her shoulder, hiding a small grin. It was incredible how differently Billy acted around her now. All because of one afternoon.

"I need to talk to ya." He answered, growing louder as he neared. Quinn realized she'd intentionally slowed down, letting him fall into pace beside her with ease.

"We're talking now." She fought off a blush, her responses reminding her of the cheesy dialogue in her books. But Billy wasn't a hero or a rebel. He was just a nice face and a deep voice. Nothing more.

"Yeah, Squint. I caught that." He grumbled. His scent was strong, flooding her nose with leather, cologne, and smoke. "We gotta go somewhere else." Quinn's stomach was busting with butterflies, impeding her ability to think clearly.

"I have a pass to go to the library." She murmured, tapping her cane louder. It helped her remember to take a step, to keep moving. Otherwise, she feared she might come to a stop altogether. Billy huffed a snort through his nose.

"Fuck the library. We're goin' out back." Quinn swallowed her heart and tried to ignore her nerves.

"What are you talking—" She didn't get to finish. His arm appeared around her shoulders and he turned them left, away from her destination.

"Just trust me." He murmured. Quinn squirmed against his body. He'd pinned her there like an appendage, making her panic. She couldn't guide herself with him being so pushy.

"Billy, let go." She muttered. But he didn't release her. Instead, her cane was suddenly out of her hand and she heard distinct clicking as it was folded up.

"Just chill, Squint." Now her face was flushed for an entirely different reason. Billy was practically abducting her, taking her only means of sight and taking her out of her safety zone. Quite literally. And it was starting to scare her. She hadn't forgotten who he was.

"Billy…" Her fear must have shown through her voice, because his grip on her shoulders softened. He was holding her then, like how a good friend would embrace another.

"Trust me." His lips grazed her temple, eliciting a wave of shivers up her back. Billy Darley was asking her to trust him. Clutching her little novel to her chest, she swallowed.

The story she'd been reading one was about a police detective falling in love with a woman suspected of killing her husband. And she'd just gotten to the pinnacle moment; the moment where he decides to abandon his common sense and principles in favor of his heart.

Much easier said than done.

Billy moved them quickly, making a beeline for the rear of the school building. Then he came to a stop, releasing her to push open a set of heavy double doors. Quinn swallowed and followed the warm sunshine outside, using her hands to avoid the doorway. To her surprise, Billy took one of her outstretched hands and pulled her through, letting the door clap closed behind her.

"See, much better than the library." He said with a smirk in his voice. Quinn yanked her hand away and locked her knees, refusing to take a step further.

"What do you want?" There was an odd echo off a dumpster nearby and it bounced off the brick wall, out into the open parking lot. The sun felt good on her face, so she turned away from the chilly shade, hesitantly stepping further from the school.

"Just give me a minute." He muttered, moving around behind her. Quinn didn't care enough to try and figure out what he was doing. She was certainly going to get in trouble for this, and she wasn't even a willing participant.

"Give me my cane." She demanded, frustration fueling her bravery. Billy chuckled.

"You'll get it back when we're done." That pushed her to the limit and Quinn whirled around, frowning in his general direction.

"What does that mean?" The clank of the door opening cut off her yell, drowning the echoes of her voice with sharp metallic screeches.

"Bout fuckin' time." Billy growled, his voice suddenly an octave deeper than before. Someone had arrived. Quinn strained to distinguish between echoes and the original footsteps. Two people.

"Sorry Bill." Her heart skipped at the reply. Bodie. He'd been in her English class at the beginning of the year. Quinn knew him in voice only, recalling the few comments he'd made about the young, blonde teacher they'd had. Apparently Miss Samson had been very attractive. "This mothafucka tried ta duck me."

"Billy, I swear ta Jesus, I didn't—" Then there was a dull thwacking sound and the unknown speaker let out a short shout before falling to the ground. Quinn jumped and immediately hugged herself.

"Don't make me hit ya again." Billy snarled. Then his boots were scuffling across the gravel in her direction. "Come 'ere, Quinn." She stumbled backwards, grappling with the shock that had stolen her composure.

"Get away from me." She hissed, swinging her arms in an attempt to evade him. Billy snatched one of her elbows without a moment of hesitation and pulled her back towards the school. "Let me go!" Tears of fear started to fill her eyes and he let out a short sigh.

"Relax. I'm not gonna hurt you." Her face crumbled and she tried to turn away. But there was no hiding her crying. "Jesus Christ." Billy murmured.

"Why's she here anyway?" Bodie asked, his voice growing closer as Quinn was pulled towards the school. The third, injured person was still on the ground, shuffling gravel around as he groaned.

"Just…" Billy swung her around, gripping both of her shoulders with his hands. Then he was talking directly into her face. "Quit crying. The sooner ya help me, the sooner you go back ta your book." Quinn turned her face away, but a hand caught her chin and turned it back. "Promise." The last word surprised her and Quinn swallowed, taking longer breaths to slow the tears. When she was calm, Billy released her face. "I need ya to tell me if this kid is lyin'." She frowned and he quickly continued. Apparently he'd remembered that she didn't like being treated like a parlor trick.

"I need ta know because my ass is on the line. Got me? I gotta know." He spoke so softly, she was sure Bodie hadn't heard. Those words were for her only. Billy was admitting he needed her help, that he depended on it. Quinn started to wipe the tears off her cheeks with the back of her hand.

"How am I supposed to do that?" Billy's body moved away and she tucked her book to her chest.

"Get up." His voice was harsh again, ordering the third person to his feet. Quinn shifted her weight nervously, listening as the ground scraped with movement.

"What will you do if he is lying?" She asked, shivering in the shadow of the school building. Billy moved back towards her.

"That's my problem. Not yours." The two other boys came closer, crowding her with sound.

"Are you going to kill him?" She asked the question hesitantly, almost whispering. Bodie made her jump as he let out an abrupt laugh.

"Is she serious?" The third boy made a small grunting sound and Bodie's tone turned mocking. "She thinks we're gonna kill ya." Quinn felt a sense of relief at his reaction. Maybe she was making a bigger deal out of this than necessary.

"You'll wish you were dead when I'm done." Billy angrily growled, his voice moving away to where Quinn assumed his victim stood. "But I won't kill ya."

"Billy I swear—" The boy spoke up again and Quinn flinched before the blow even came, knowing full well that Billy would strike. And strike he did, sending the boy to the ground with a punch to the gut.

"Stop!" She yelped, scuffling away from the three. The tears threatened to fall again, but Quinn forced herself to breathe deep. "Just ask him and I'll tell you." Billy sniffed and the boy groaned, as he was no doubt being hauled to his feet.

"Did ya steal two hundreds bucks from me?" Billy snarled. Quinn blinked in surprise. Who would be dumb enough to do that?

"No!" The boy exclaimed. "I swear, it was all there. All the money was there." Quinn listened to his voice: the pitch, the speed; and she let out a small sigh. Moving slowly, she shuffled towards the boy.

"How much were you supposed to pay Billy?" She asked gently, scuffling forward until she was close enough to hear his breathing. He was terrified and that wasn't helping. It made it harder to distinguish any other emotions in his voice. So far, it was all fear.

"Eight hundred." Billy snarled from beside her, covering her arms in goosebumps. With as much courage as she could muster, she turned her head in his direction.

"I was asking him." Bodie made a soft snorting sound and Billy stepped into her, his dark scent engulfing her.

"Don't push me, Squint." Quinn frowned as he snapped into her ear.

"I'm not." He exhaled angrily, his breath brushing over her neck. It was hard for her to hold still. She wanted to fidget, or move away. Turning her head back towards the boy, she took a deep, cleansing breath.

"How much?" Miraculously, her voice was as smooth as silk, calm despite her spiking blood pressure.

"Eight hundred." The boy breathed. Quinn nodded.

"Did you take the two hundred dollars?" Billy shifted beside her and the boy rushed to answer.

"No! I swear ta god. I ain't lyin'. I swear to ya, I ain't lyin'." He sounded defeated by the time he finished, repeating his words on the verge of tears. Quinn listened without a word, but Billy couldn't wait any longer.

"THEN WHO THE FUCK DID?"

"I don't know, Billy. Wasn't me, I swear." Quinn's face fell and Billy suddenly lunged. In a blur of voices and shuffling, the boy pleaded with Billy as Bodie joined in, muttering threats of his own under his breath.

"Stop!" Quinn shouted over the commotion and Billy flew into her face, panting and furious.

"I saw your face, Quinn. You KNOW he's lyin!" Out of impulse, she reached out and grabbed at him, ending up with a handful of his jacket. Immediately Billy was silent.

"He is lying." She said softly, holding onto his jacket with a vice grip. "But I don't think he took the money." Everything lulled into quiet and Billy's breath hit her face as his anger slowly ebbed.

"What's that supposed ta mean?" She released him as he spoke, his voice finding an even keel once again.

"I think he knows who took it." Quinn brought her book back to her chest. "Or has an idea of who might have." She added gently. Billy didn't answer, looming over her.

"Ya know somethin', ya little fuck?" Bodie was the one snarling now, a solid smack telling Quinn he'd hit the boy in question. She wanted to run, cover her face, something to get away. But Billy stood in front of her, unmoving as Bodie continued the interrogation.

"Bucky, man." The boy finally murmured. "Idiot was flush last week and everyone knows he doesn't have dough like that." Quinn relaxed and Bodie suddenly chuckled.

"Well shit." Making his way over to Billy, Bodie gave another short laugh. "The blind girl's a mind reader." Any relief she had felt was gone in an instant. Face lined with anger, Quinn lurched backwards and felt along the brick wall to the double doors. Being a spectacle was not new, but now she was an amusement as well, being used like a living lie detector test. She didn't get far before Billy was in front of her, blocking the way.

"See, that wasn't hard." He muttered quietly.

"Leave me alone." She hissed, tugging open a door. In her huff, Quinn didn't remember the slight incline into the building and she tripped. As she braced herself on the door, Billy grabbed her arm, holding her upright.

"Come on, Squint…" He grunted, helping her into the school. But Quinn tore her arm away, thrashing from his grasp.

"Don't touch me." His small snort of a reply only made her angrier. He thought it was funny? He had dragged her out of the school, forced her to help him, and now he was laughing?

"Here." Her fingers touched plastic and Quinn relaxed a little as Billy put her cane in her hand. "We good?" As she extended the cane, her anger bubbled over. Smacking the tip to the floor, she swished it over the even tile.

"Good?" She stomped away, emboldened by the ability to see where she was going. "I'm humiliated and angry, not to mention I could get in trouble for not being in the library right now." Swiping the back of her hand over her cheek, she rid her face of any trace of tears. She wasn't sure if he was even listening. For all she knew, only the walls heard her ranting down the hall.

"Humiliated?" Alas, he was there, following with quiet steps. Quinn felt more angry tears in her eyes but it didn't stop her from continuing.

"Let's get the blind girl to read minds. We'll just steal her cane and make her helpless." She hissed.

"I needed you."

"Then ask!" She whirled around and Billy let out another small snort. "Why are you laughing!" Quinn couldn't believe him. She was enraged at his lack empathy. He'd gone from only mocking her in class to dismissing her feelings completely.

"You're kinda hot when you're mad, Squint." If she'd been red-faced before, she certainly was then. "Better close that mouth…" He purred, coming closer. "Or I might not ask ta kiss you." Turning on her heel, she kept walking down the hall.

"Why start now? You just do whatever you like, it seems. Hurt people, use people—"

His hands whirled her around and one palm cradled her head while the other pressed into the small of her back. And in a swift movement, he pinned her up against a locker. Before she could protest or even resist, his mouth was on her own. But it was very different from the first time he'd kissed her.

Billy took his time, aggressively tasting her and nibbling on her bottom lip before he took a breath. When he finally did let her go for air, Quinn could feel the room spinning, listening as he purred a laugh against her cheek.

"If ya moan like that again, I'm gonna start thinking ya like me." He growled, trailing his mouth to her ear. With a stunned blink, she tried to remember. Had she moaned? Her heart was screaming in her chest, her ears were pounding, and she could barely stand. Maybe she had. He nipped at her mouth and Quinn gave in, reaching up to touch his lips. They had been her favorite part of his face. Pouty and soft, perfect against hers. He let her touch them for a moment before he closed in on her again. But this time he spoke, whispering against her lips.

"Quinn." She shivered as he said her name. As she gasped, he devoured her mouth and her hand slid back into his hair. His mane. It was down, almost to his jaw, and she locked her fingers in the long, soft strands. Billy groaned and ran his thumb over her jaw. When his tongue slid between her lips, she definitely heard herself whimper. Gossip held up on one front; he was a stunning kisser. Taking a breath, she let her head fall back on a locker.

"You could have asked." She panted. Billy leaned in and ghosted his mouth to her ear.

"I don't ask for things. I take them." He purred. Then he kissed the corner of her mouth, backing away until she couldn't feel his warmth. "And I never say thank you." He added. She opened her mouth to retort, but the building erupted in a shrill ring as the bell announced the end of lunch. So that had been his thanks? A hot, incredible kiss in the middle of the school hallway? Quinn's heart leapt into her throat. Anyone could have seen them. He must have known that.

"See ya 'round, Squint." He was walking back to the double doors when he called to her, his voice almost lost in the sea of their approaching classmates.

"Not my name." She muttered back.

* * *

><p>When she finally made it to Mr. Fields' classroom, the second bell rang. She'd barely made it to class on time, and yet she wasn't bothered by that fact. Finding her seat in the front row, she sat softly at her desk and pulled her book from her backpack. She found her spot easily enough, reading absentmindedly as Mr. Field's called roll. And as she read the words, her mind kept returning to one thing. Billy's voice, saying her name. Closing the novel, Quinn let a small grin spread across her face.<p>

"How's the book?" She smiled as Mr. Fields passed her desk.

"Good." She replied. "But I've read better."

* * *

><p><strong>If you have ideas for another chapter, please BY ALL MEANS leave them. I'm starving for inspiration. However, I wouldn't expect an update soon, as I will be graduating college in early June. :P…and yet, I'm suffering from Peter Pan syndrome.<strong>


	4. Chapter 4

**AHHHHH I'm back. Wasn't sure if I was going to be able to get another chapter out of this one. It was a struggle. lol. BUT I would like to thank my girl Lisa. This story still exists because of her! Lots of love to you darling. **

**Shout out to my reviewers! A lot of you were Anon and I can't thank you enough! And thank you for all the well wishes. :) Graduating was great…now I just need a job… ;) Hope you enjoy!**

* * *

><p><em>I can't fight this feeling any longer.<br>And yet I'm still afraid to let it flow.  
>What started out as friendship,<br>Has grown stronger.  
>I only wish I had the strength to let it show.<em>

* * *

><p>Freddie Rhode was having a party. He lived two blocks away and his parents were away for the weekend.<p>

The turnout was going to be huge.

Plus, Freddie had two sisters, Suzie and Ashley. That meant three times as many invites and girls. Lots of girls. Quinn had gleaned that insight during fourth period history, listening to a group of football players. They, however, had used the term "chicks". But it wasn't the girls that made the party interesting to Quinn. After a long day of subtly listening in and compiling information, she knew when, where, and who was going to be at the party.

That's why, at two in the morning, she was perched on her back stoop with her hair tucked neatly into a ponytail, her face clean, and her teeth brushed. She was wishing. Wishing that a little luck would float her way.

Along with him.

She wrinkled her nose as she confronted the silly reason she was sitting outside alone. A boy. Not just any boy. Billy. Billy Darley. Billy-Darley-from-deep-Southie-who-probably-broke-six-laws-a-day Billy Darley. It was growing colder by the minute and her fingers were getting numb, but she remained on that step, pretending to read with her blind fingers in hopes of talking to Billy Darley.

The distant thump of music would rise and fall, no doubt changing with each song. Every time the volume would increase, Quinn's heart would speed, the music keeping her hopes alive. Too much silence made her feel stupid, like she was waiting on something that was long gone. But the truth was dumb anyway. She was waiting up for him like he would come home to her. And that was just stupid.

But when footsteps crunched down the alley, her entire chest lit up like a flame.

"You are so lame." His voice was so welcome it sent a warm wave of happiness from her stomach to her frozen cheeks. Suppressing the urge to smile from ear to ear, Quinn pretended to be surprised, closing her book with a small jump.

"For sitting in my yard?" She shot back, grinning a little to ease the retort.

"Yeah. Sittin' out here alone at two in the mornin' is stupid, Squint." He grumbled, pushing open the sad gate and clomping his way into the yard.

"Well I couldn't sleep with all the noise." She murmured lamely, tucking invisible hairs behind her ear.

"Then why didn't ya go?" His response confused her and she frowned, tilting her head. Billy moved closer, sending a gust of smoke up her nose. He'd started smoking a while ago, judging by his smell, and she held her breath, praying the heavy scent would dissipate.

"To the party? I can't go to a party…" She murmured, tracing her finger over the title on her book, over and over until it was ringing the skin.

"Why not?" He muttered. "There isn't a fuckin' guest list." His voice revealed a smirk and Quinn hid a grin.

"No one to go with." She answered quickly. "I can't go to those types of things alone."

"I always go alone." Billy purred. "Doesn't mean I don't have a date." His voice deepened over the word 'date' and Quinn blushed. He wasn't talking about dating at all.

"I didn't mean it like that…"

"Yeah, I know." He replied, hissing smoke through his lips. There was a sound at the end of his breath, a smile. She could imagine how his mouth felt as he did it, his broad bottom lip stretched taunt across his teeth. Then he was moving, his jeans swishing under his leather jacket. Quinn held very still as he sat down next to her on the stoop. But as soon as he was beside her, she had to move.

"Wow." She coughed, waving a hand in front of her face.

"What?" Billy barked defensively and Quinn immediately smiled, continuing to fan her face.

"That perfume…it doesn't flatter you." In truth, it wasn't horrible. It was just strong, filling her head and choking the air from her lungs. If she'd stayed beside him, it would have faded from her notice. But, honestly, she didn't want to sit next to Billy Darley, smelling another girl on him.

"Eh whatever. She was hot." She didn't mean to flinch, but it happened before she could help it. It shouldn't have shocked her.

"She probably wasn't from Southie. That perfume is too expensive, probably from a counter at the mall."

"Quit showin' off." He muttered. She grinned and Billy stood, walking toward her from across the yard.

"Do ya remember everythin' ya smell?" He asked. When he reached her, he brushed his fingertips over the side of her cheek, barely touching the skin. She blushed and shook her head.

"No. I just…" Crossing her arms, she shrugged. "...everything tells a story." Billy only waited for a moment before he sighed.

"That makes no sense, Squint." She thought for a moment, chewing her lip, before she had the idea.

"I'll show you."

* * *

><p>She hadn't planned on walking anywhere, so Quinn very slowly led Billy from her backyard to an unused dirt road. She'd found it once when she was younger and had walked it several times since. It was a natural path for her to follow; the ground dipped into a smooth, worn path, leading away from the developed neighborhood. Trees had grown up on either side, their roots poking up in the old road. She was careful to lead with her heels to avoid tripped on one. But Quinn had the feeling Billy was watching too, waiting for a moment to silently catch her.<p>

"Where are we goin'?" He finally sighed, flicking away his second cigarette. Quinn wrinkled her nose and grinned.

"You'll see." She teased, biting her bottom lip to keep from laughing. Billy was audibly uncomfortable, being led away from what he knew. And it was odd. He was strong and fast, the most dangerous person she'd ever met. Yet he was rustling his coat beside her in a nervous squirm. Quinn wished she could touch him, but not like he would want. She wanted to hold his hand.

Her palm tickled at the idea.

"Do you smell it yet?" She whispered, turning her head slightly towards him. He sniffed audibly and took a heavy stride, kicking up dirt by her feet.

"Smell what?" He muttered. A sudden moment of bravery over took her and Quinn stopped, her hand reaching out for him. Billy slammed to a halt and she ended up with a handful of his jacket. The thick leather was cool, squishing in her palm as she gripped it.

"Stop and just close your eyes." She whispered, releasing his jacket with a blush. She was never this forward with anyone. It was amazing that she was even able to speak around Billy, let alone order him to close his eyes.

When he didn't respond verbally, Quinn swallowed thickly and stepped closer, reaching a hand up to his face.

"Squint, what are ya—" His voice cut off when she carefully landed her fingertips on his cheeks. Fighting the urge to tremble, she slid them towards his nose.

"Close your eyes." Billy let out a sigh and Quinn blushed, a nervous giggle building up in her gut. But, to her amazement, he didn't shrug her away. Instead, when her fingers slid to his eyebrows and down to his eyes, the lids were closed. She dropped her hands and prayed her heart would start beating again.

"What do you smell?" She whispered. He shifted his weight, the gravel crunching under his boots.

"Dirt." He grunted. Quinn grinned and shook her head.

"What else?" Billy let out a long sigh and took a loud inhale.

"Grass." He added. Quinn made a face.

"There's a light metallic scent. Bitter, like copper." Billy said nothing, but she heard him sniffing again, this time taking a few seconds to study the air. "Smell that?"

"Sorta." He murmured, shuffling closer to her as she took a deep breath. They weren't far from the old, rusting docks. She could smell the old metal several yards back, but here it was thicker, hanging on the air.

"And the damp flavor." She added. "Like musty fog." Quinn could barely pick up on that smell herself, so she was sure he couldn't. But Billy put the dots together.

"The docks." He murmured with a quiet smile. She nodded and blushed.

"My favorite place." Quinn whispered. It had been those smells that had led her to those docks all those years ago. She'd chased them down until the sea was all around her. As she remembered the memory, Quinn became acutely aware of Billy's silence. He was normally very loud, even when just standing. But now his breathing had quieted and his body was motionless. Her face flushed with warmth and Quinn curled a ringlet of hair behind her ear.

"You're staring." She chided gently. Billy laughed and the sound sent shockwaves up her back into her chest. It was low and quiet, growling from the back of his throat.

"How do ya know my eyes aren't closed?" With a shrug, she turned back towards their destination.

"I'm magic." She muttered, sarcasm creeping into her voice. _Someone's being bold._ Billy must have thought the same thing because he let out a snort of a laugh, following her with clomps of his boots.

"So you can call yourself magic, but I can't?" He purred. She shook her head.

"No. You can't." _Watch it, Quinn…_ Billy snorted again.

"You're still pissed about the thing behind the school." He stated. Quinn sighed and crossed her arms.

"Not pissed. Just grumpy." She murmured, sighing into the air. They were getting closer. She could almost hear the water.

"Grump all ya want. It's done." Billy said it gently, but pointedly. And he was right. No matter how much she held it against him, what he'd done was over. There was nothing she could do to change it.

"Well it better not happen again." She grumbled. "I had nightmares for a week." Immediately she regretted admitting that. In fact, she didn't know why she had. It was a humiliating thing to say. And she'd just thrown it out there.

"Nightmares?" Billy repeated the word, fishing for more. And she had no intention of telling him more. That became abundantly clear when she trod forward faster, hoping to pull ahead of him. But Billy didn't settle for silence. His big hand softly closed around her elbow, pulling her back to him.

"What nightmares?" She let him bring her to a stop, tugging her to his side. He was big and warm, shielding her from a gust of cold air.

"Just nightmares." She muttered, crossing her arms. His touch appeared on her jaw, tilting her head up to his. Her heart did somersaults as his fingers drifted to her chin.

"About me?" He sounded like he didn't believe her, smirking at her from the darkness. And she suddenly wasn't as nervous.

"Yes well, you can be…" Too many words filled the void. _Terrifying, dominating, delicious, demeaning, rude._ "…intimidating." She decided on the most sterile of her choices. Billy snorted.

"You're intimidated by me?" He purred, swirling his big thumb over the skin beneath her lip. _Uh, duh?_

"It's hard to fight off when you're beating the crap out of some poor kid after you'd dragged me out of the school." Billy dropped her chin and sighed.

"Jesus, Squint. Ya make it sound like I hurt ya." Then he was back, holding her jaw in the palm of his hand to force her to face him. "And that 'poor kid' was a tweakin' asshole who woulda let me take a bullet for a mistake I didn't make." Her breath froze in her throat and no witty retorts formed in her mind. _A bullet? He would have_ _died?_

"Close your mouth." He suddenly murmured, letting her go. She fought to swallow and gulped down a massive breath.

"Sorry." She whispered without thinking, brushing hair behind her ears. "I didn't realize it was that serious." Billy let out a sigh.

"Well it was. That's why I was pushy." He muttered. "But I sure as hell didn't mean ta give ya fuckin' nightmares. I mean, shit." She could hear a smirk in his voice.

"I can tell you're very sorry." Quinn murmured, turning before he could grab her face again. It was becoming clear that was his way of getting her attention. No hiding when he was a fraction of an inch away. _You don't mind it though…_

"Nah." He purred, picking up the pace behind her. The faster he walked, she faster she pushed herself to lead. Soon they were in range of the quiet swells of the coast. She could smell the salty water; hear the crash and spray of the waves. It was her favorite spot.

"Stop here." She suddenly ordered, holding out her arm. Billy did as he was told, pressing into her bare arm. He was so warm in his jacket, the material of his t-shirt radiated heat. She wondered what it would be like to wrap her arms around his waist under that jacket. Shaking the thought from her head, she turned to face him.

"This is it." She grinned as a wave crashed on the dock. Billy said nothing and she suddenly felt very self-conscious. What if he thought she was an idiot? _Maybe this wasn't a good idea…_

"Ok. So how is this a story?" He grunted. Quinn sighed and shrugged, turning towards the coast as small waves broke on the shore.

"I just feel everything here. My senses tell me a story." She murmured. Holding her hand at her side, even with her hip, she rubbed her fingers to her palm. "The heavy air. It has the salt water in it." Then she inhaled. "I can smell it sometimes when I sit on my back stoop. Tangy and crisp." A wave smashed against the dock and the spray drifted on the air. "And you can hear the water." She smiled, closing her eyes and tilting her head up to the sky. "All the way down the coast. So strong and powerful."

Slowly, Quinn became aware of a growing warmth on her back. Then suddenly she felt him, standing directly behind her. Her senses told her to run, to bolt away. But her body told her to stay. And stay she did. Gently, he stood flush against her back, his breath fanning out over her left shoulder. Then his hand rested on that shoulder.

"It's just a dirty old pier." Billy purred into her ear, his nose grazing her temple. She shivered at his proximity and turned her head until her forehead touched the tip of his nose.

"No it's not." Then she touched his cheek, drifting her fingers higher. "Close your eyes."

He obeyed, yet again, and she kept her eyes closed, happy to mimic the simple instruction.

"Listen." She whispered. His hand slid lower to her elbow, pulling her shoulder blades against his chest. "Feel the water?" She asked gently, pretending to focus on the docks when all she could think about was his hand. Then one can became two, both of them softly encircling her upper arms.

"Yeah." Billy slid his hands higher, up her shoulders to the back of her head, weaving his fingers in her hair.

"Calm yet mighty." She breathed, her chest compressing with excitement. Billy nodded, his chin moving against her ear. Then, pulling gently, he brought her head back, exposing her throat. His breath picked up, spilling over her collarbone as he teased the skin with brushes of his lips. She could feel the hair beneath his lower lip, ghosting along her neck until she couldn't breathe, her stomach squirming.

"Perfect." He purred. Quinn's knees nearly buckled from his voice, the deep bass curling down her spine into her stomach, knotting her in ways she'd never felt. There was a scorching heat building in her belly, her blood drumming in her veins. His every touch was electric. His hands moved to her throat, rough palms passing over the delicate skin. It forced a shiver down her back and the hair on her arms stood on end.

Billy stepped even closer and Quinn realized she'd subconsciously inched away, turning her face from his eyes. There was starkness to his approach. Billy didn't back down from anything and she was trained to do the opposite. Under his gaze, Quinn felt naked, exposed. But, working against her instincts, she fought to stay in place as his thumbs traversed the soft pulse points on her throat up to her jaw. While he moved, she held her breath.

Billy barely touched her skin, but her nerves tingled throughout every inch of her body. Over her jaw to her chin, his hands teased their way to her face and he turned her, pulling her closer. Then he flattened his large fingers over her mouth. Instantly she snapped it shut, her heart throbbing in her ears. It didn't deter him; he traced her top lip, swiping his thumb over the delicate arch at the center. In the back of his throat, he made an airy, low growling sound. And Quinn's stomach lurched, popping her lips open in a silent gasp. Without missing a second, Billy ducked his head to brush his open mouth to hers and she trembled, her body filling with fire. His tongue teased the tip of her own, but he didn't enter. They barely touched.

"Quinn." He whispered, trailing his mouth across her cheek. Then, letting out a hard sigh, he stepped back. Air filled her lungs with such speed, Quinn practically wheezed. Billy crunched his boots on the gravel as he adjusted his footing and she rubbed a hand over her face, willing composure back into her features.

"What?" Billy rustled in his jacket, the thick leather swishing against denim. After a moment, the metallic flick of a lighter broke the silence and Quinn listened as the end of a cigarette burned.

"Nothing" He muttered, hissing smoke away from her. She drew her arms across her chest. Without Billy so close, she was slowly growing cold. As he took another, quick drag, he let out a snort. Quinn chewed on her lip for a second.

"What were you going to say?" He was quiet, holding in his breath in deliberation. When he exhaled, she could hear her heart stop.

"I gotta take you home." A breath of disappointment wheezed from her chest and Quinn slowly nodded. They walked in silence back to her neighborhood, Billy mumbling a word of warning every so often when the path was uneven.

* * *

><p>It bothered her the entire way home. She wanted to know what words he was going to whisper to her. Something had changed in him. Billy was the master of camouflage. He was whatever he needed to be to survive. But she'd felt it. In those moments, by the seashore, she had chipped away at his mask. There hadn't been a barrier between them; for an instant, she'd been face to face with Billy Darley. The real Billy Darley.<p>

But only for an instant, then it was over. And now, even though he was right beside her, they were a million miles apart. As they parted ways at her back gate, Quinn waited and listened to him walk away. In a way, she felt like she knew him. Weeks ago, he couldn't have more of a stranger. Now, she was positive she understood him better than most.

Because, for a fraction of a second, Billy had let her in.

* * *

><p><strong>Bahhh the angst. ;) I have another chapter started, so hopefully it wont be long until you guys have another installation. <strong>

**Love to leeseelee, xoShortee93, Australia, honey-and-lace, juniemoon, missrissa, n'importequoi, Elektra**

_Lyrics by Reo Speedway_


	5. Chapter 5

**You want more? I'll give you more! ;) Love to my reviewers and HI LISA! :) Enjoy. **

* * *

><p>The air whispered to her through a crack in her open window and Quinn let a smile cross her lips. She rarely awoke this peacefully. With a sigh she turned onto her back, stretching her arms above her head until her muscles shivered with pleasure. She gave a satisfied moan and suddenly she heard a rustle inside the room. Her body froze in shock. <em>Am I imagining things?<em>

"Don't stop." His voice ground up his throat, thick with lust and grated like gravel from need. Quinn relaxed a little, but Billy's presence was still very surprising.

"How did you get in here?" She whispered, tugging her sheets up to her chin. He moved and the bed dipped as he sat at the end.

"The window." He stated plainly. Then there was a sag in the mattress near her hip, then another on the opposite side. His body heat blanketed her and Quinn held her breath. She could feel him, his hands braced on either side of her; she could hear him rustling the covers at her knees.

"What are you doing?" She stuttered. The words were barely a whisper from her lips and Billy growled a dark chuckle, deep and throaty.

"I want you, Quinn." Her heart rocketed through her ribs and she held back a desperate moan. "Only you." _Wait, what?_ Brain spinning in circles, she reached down and found his soft, blond locks at her waist. Billy let another laugh rumble through his chest and he dipped his head, rubbing his nose right…

"Billy." She whimpered, squirming beneath her comforter as he brought a screaming fire between her legs. This was lust. This is why all of the other girls threw themselves at Billy Darley. Because he could do _this_ to a girl.

"Tell me ya want me, Quinn." He was purring at her, slowly climbing up her torso. Air wouldn't fill her lungs fast enough and she was panting at a hungry pace. This was insane. She couldn't do this…

"I want you, Billy." She whimpered softly, grasping his head as he moved higher. His mouth found hers in a heartbeat, claiming her with his scalding tongue and sinful groans.

"Tell me ya mine." He growled, pressing a hand in the small of her back to lift her onto his frame. Quinn clung to his neck, her hands tangled in his silky mane.

"I'm yours." She pledged honestly. Her chest exploded with warmth as his assault became more heated at her words. He was pleased with that answer and she gave it to him again. "I'm yours."

_I'm yours…_

* * *

><p>Quinn couldn't stop fidgeting in her seat as the class meandered into their seats. She'd been dreading this period all day, hoping this would be a normal day. Just a run-of-the-mill math class. No stress, no problems, and no Billy.<p>

Her heart leapt into her throat when she thought about him and her hand found its way to her cheeks, embarrassment filling them with a hot blush.

_It was just a dream._ She nodded to herself and shook off the emotion, throwing open the math book in front of her. _But it was a really good dream…_ Her face heated again. It had felt so real: his touch, his voice. When she'd blinked awake, her body had been covered in a light sweat and every inch of her skin had been on fire. But nothing had horrified her more than her…

_Arousal. _She flinched at the word and prayed no one was paying attention to her internal turmoil. Running her fingers over the words on the page, she read about math. Simple and logical. Her breathing calmed and she felt her nerves settling.

But then a sound rippled to her ear. A boot. Her heart took off again, cart wheeling out into the hallway where the footsteps continued to echo. She wormed in her seat but her body was already heating up again. It was forcing her to remember the taste of his lips, the gravity of his body against hers, and the heavy hunger that had coiled in the pit of her stomach.

"Shit dude!" Bodie exclaimed from the back of the room. "Look who showed up!" His strut became audibly slower as Billy entered the class.

"Did ya miss me?" He asked with a smirk. Quinn's body froze and she kept her head down toward her book. She knew he wasn't talking to her, but it didn't matter. His voice and choice of words had done their job, turning her inside out.

"Always do, Mr. Darley." Mr. Fields interrupted the boys with the sarcastic retort and Quinn was relieved to feel a smile lift her lips. "Now if you could please sit, I'd appreciate it." He added, crossing the room to his desk and shuffling papers around. Billy eventually filed down a row, passing Quinn with a gust of air. His smell. Smoke, leather, and… She wrinkled her nose trying to pinpoint the weakest scent. It wasn't obvious but it also wasn't pleasant. It was bitter and chemical. The smell made her stomach clench and her chest constricted with worry. Whatever it was he'd been around…

it couldn't have been good.

* * *

><p>When class was dismissed and the last bell rang, Quinn cautiously made her way out of the school. It was a chore to do so and took quite a bit of concentration. People would attempt to avoid her, but generally she was pushed with the crowd down the halls, caught in the flood of moving bodies. Today was no different, and she found herself abruptly standing outside, the heat of the sun ringing the surface of her skin. It was a hot day and everyone was eager to get into their air-conditioned cars. Quinn, however, had a long bus ride to look forward to, full of sweaty middle schoolers and their collective cloud of body odor. She grimaced just thinking about it and quickly made up her mind to walk home.<p>

Quietly making her way along the front of the building, her cane tapped gently on the concrete. The commotion of her classmates behind her, she started to hone in on the softer sounds. There was a breeze and she smiled in appreciation. The temperature was high, but the day was lovely. Blossoms on the trees spread a faint perfume and the heat made her skin feel radiant. She especially loved the way it felt on her eyelids. There wasn't a way of explaining way.

As she was enjoying the sun, Quinn caught a faint scent at the corner of the school. Smoke. _Billy._ She lost her smile immediately and flushed, picking up her pace. The last thing she wanted was to talk to him so soon. He'd invaded her dreams in the most intimate way possible and it would be obvious that her feelings towards him had changed. Not that she'd been immune to him before. But now, she feared becoming one of the many, drooling whenever he was near.

"Just get that blind chick ta play palm reader and no one'll cross ya." She heard a voice and slowed, deciding not to bolt around the corner of the building. _They're talking about you._ Her face flushed as she was openly mocked by an unknown boy, his voice bouncing faintly off the pavement and brick.

"Ya kiddin'?" _Bodie._ "She threw a goddamn fit last time Bill tried ta use 'er." Quinn placed a hand over her throat, fearing her pulse would give her away. But that was ridiculous. Only she had the hearing to alert them to her presence. Billy's voice oozed from around the corner, forming a low laugh.

"Trust me. I can tame Helen Keller." The boys all laughed and Quinn bit her lip to keep herself from gasping aloud. Her chest started to hurt, telling her to run but she remained frozen, rooted to the spot in a stunned form of pain. _What did you expect?_ Her mind and her heart were on different planes, her logic ridiculing her emotions.

"Butter her up with a little kiss and she's putty in my hands." The tears were there, biting at the corners of her eyes. Quinn had to turn her head away, had to fight to keep herself from screaming. _This was his game all along. _

"Dude, tell me you've hit that." A boy she didn't recognize goaded Billy on, his voice almost slimy with innuendo. There was a chorus of agreeing murmurs, as if they all hoped he had. _Hit that. That's what they think they of you. _There was no stopping her tears then. She'd never been so humiliated in her entire life.

"Ya think I'm gonna break that in?" Billy snorted. She wanted to puke. Right there on the sidewalk. He was talking about her like she was revolting. "Sex-starved virgin isn't my flavor." Billy added, grunting a laugh to punctuate his sentence.

"Talk about baggage." Bodie murmured. That was all she could take. Quinn shot away from the wall, making her way to the buses. She needed to be gone, to be home as soon as possible. Her heart was shattering into pieces and her body was following suit.

Her cane moved at lightning speed, almost dangerously quick across the ground. If someone had gotten too close, she probably would have given them a healthy smack across the ankles. But she didn't care. Through her tears, Quinn felt the burn of anger in her gut.

It was there, in the middle of the sidewalk, that she picked up on the smell. Smoke and leather. _Faster!_ There was no doubt that he was near, a breeze rushing his scent in her direction. Was he watching her, or maybe even…

"Slow down, Squint, I need ta —" His hand closed around her elbow and she whirled, reacting with the fury that she'd buried inside. Her hand clapped against his chest as she smacked him, pushing off and out of his grip.

"Don't touch me." She hissed, backing away with bile burning on the back of her tongue. He must have been stunned, or too furious to react, because he didn't retort or even follow her. Billy vanished completely from her senses as Quinn ran to the bus.

* * *

><p>She didn't know why she hadn't expected it. Everything in her head had told that she was going to get hurt. Sitting on the back porch, Quinn wanted to throw her book across the yard. The rest of the day she'd told herself to forget about what Billy had said. She hated him. She loathed him. He was as cold as ever, using her and turning her own feelings against her. He'd seduced her into compliance, brought forth emotions she'd never imagined, and then smashed them beneath his shoes. He'd made her think he was more than just another jerk. She'd been so wrong.<p>

Her frustration made her hands shake and as she turned a page, Quinn dropped her book onto the step at her feet. It didn't land far. It would have only taken a moment to pluck it from the surface. But it made her crumble. The sadness and embarrassment unwound and she covered her face with her hands. She'd kept it together during dinner in front of her parents, but it had only built it up for later. And now it was crashing down around her head again.

"You're such an idiot." Quinn murmured to herself. Sniffling, she fought off the tears. If anything, she refused to cry. She'd done enough of that. "Such a moron." Turning her face to the sky, she wished she could see the stars. In all her books, there were women who talked about finding beauty in the stars, finding happiness in the stars. But all she ever saw was darkness. And there were no answers in darkness.

There was a soft scuff and Quinn froze mid-sob, jerking her head upright to face the yard. But she wasn't clueless for long. As soon as she was silent, the single scuffle turned into quick footsteps.

And she knew who it was immediately.

"No." She barely scooted her butt over the stoop before Billy was on her, scent, body heat, and all.

"Just hold it." He muttered, grabbing one of her wrists in a flash. She thrashed from him, pushing off the concrete step in her bare feet.

"Get away from me, Billy Darley." Quinn hissed at him, tugging to get away. "I don't ever want to see you again." Despite her struggling, Billy pulled her off the step entirely, settling her on her feet.

"You can't see, remember?" Letting out an infuriated grunt, Quinn felt tears prickle the corners of her eyes. He had a way of making her furious, turning her own words against her.

"What is your problem?" A sob crept into her voice, cracking the anger and making it weak. She was teetering on the edge, ready to fall apart. "What did I do to deserve your abuse?" Billy kept his hold on her wrist, but it softened as she slowed her tugging. He wasn't being pushy, only ensuring she didn't run away. But that's what she wanted to do, more than anything. Being near him was only making her a sad, weepy mess.

"Abuse?" He let out a growl of a sigh. "Come on, Squint."

"My name is Quinn!" She practically screamed at him, but he didn't let her finish. When her voice threatened to wake the neighborhood, his hand covered her mouth to stifle the sound.

"Jesus! Ya tryin' ta wake the dead?" Billy grumbled, only releasing her after she'd clawed his hand away.

"Don't touch me. And get out of my yard." She snapped back, shoving his heavy arm away. He let out a sigh and she crossed her arms in a hard resolve. Tears may be streaming down her face, but she was through letting him win. Billy Darley wasn't going to manipulate her like the stupid, vapid girls from school. It wouldn't happen. It couldn't happen.

"Quinn." He said her name like he was stating fact, proving something in a single word. But her anger didn't waver; the smooth bass didn't sway her.

"Go. Away." The sound of moving leather put him inches from her face and she held her breath, praying he'd yell and leave. Break everything once and for all. That's what she wanted.

"No." His voice growled low and hard, like a caged animal warning it's captor. Her body prickled to attention and Quinn hid a disheartened sigh. Of course he wasn't going to give up. Billy Darley always got the last word. And, this time, his last word was 'No.'

"I hate you." She hissed the words before she realized she'd thought them up. It was cruel and much ruder than anything she'd ever said to another person. In fact, her voice cracked in shock before she finished, her throat closing up in surprise. Could she really be that angry?

"Good." He grunted back. "It's probably best for a snob like you." Her mouth dropped open and her cheeks boiled with rage.

"SNOB?" He moved to cover her mouth again, but she slapped his hand away, lowering her voice to a venomous hiss. "How dare you call me a snob!"

"What, does that shock the little east-side princess?" Quinn wanted to sink her nails into his leather jacket and shake him with all her might. But she couldn't find the control to move, her entire body seizing in fury.

"You ridicule me and insult me, the BLIND girl and I'm the snob?" More tears leaked from her eyes, but it didn't slow her angry rant. "If anything, it's people like you who are the REAL snobs. You look down your noses at anyone who doesn't break the rules or do whatever they want. Anyone that has, I don't know, FEELINGS! Forget emotions! If you feel anything above the waist you're a big loser!" Her voice slowly escalated but Billy did nothing to muffle her. And when she finished, she fully expected to hear the patter of her mother in the kitchen. But no one came to investigate. The night continued in calm silence as she gulped down air.

Billy stood as still as a statue, giving her almost no hint to what he thought or where he was. In fact, Quinn wished he would vanish again. Fall away into the dark. That was his trick, after all, vanishing without warning. But he was there, staring as he held each breath for an eternity.

"Ya want an apology?" When he did finally speak, his voice was shockingly calm. Quinn didn't hesitate.

"Not from you." He moved closer and she felt his t-shirt pressed against her crossed forearms. Billy was standing flush against her and she lifted her head to confront him face to face. For a moment, she wished she could see his face. He was the one person who could hide his feelings from her. And in the dark, on that back stoop, he was unreadable.

"I don't care. I don't say thank you. I don't love. I don't regret. And I sure as hell don't say sorry." His speech dropped her heart into her stomach. His coldness was painful and she felt another round of tears pop up in her eyes. "I gave up on all that years ago." The hot, salty tears streaked down her face as he said each word without a lick of feeling. He was vacant. Nothing like the Billy she'd thought she'd discovered. She remembered the night at the docks and her chest sliced with pain. He felt nothing despite all the quiet, charged moments they'd shared. She'd opened herself up to him in a way she'd done to no one. As her bottom lip trembled with stifled sobs, Quinn hugged herself tight.

Suddenly, his hands were on her face, stunning her so much that she stood frozen in place.

"I didn't mean what I said about you." When he softly added the rest, there wasn't an ounce of air in her body left to breathe. Her heart stopped and her lip went still as his big hands held her face in place. "I lied." He murmured, sneaking the tips of his fingers into her hair. Weaving them in a few shallow strands, Billy left the rest unsaid. That was all she was going to get. And slowly, Quinn came to realize this. If she ever wanted Billy Darley, she had to understand Billy Darley. He didn't play by the regular rules. He had a playbook of his own.

"How do I know you're not lying right now?" Quinn formed the question slowly, sorting through her combined shock and anger. Billy slowly dropped his hands, leaving her alone again on the stair.

"I've never lied to you." She swallowed and thought back, recalling all their conversations, from the very beginning. Replaying the day in the alley and the nights they'd spent in the yard, she slowly realized he was telling the truth. Apart from a few fibs, which she'd called him on, Billy had never really lied to her face.

"So you don't think I'm a sex-starved Helen Keller? You didn't touch me and kiss me just to string me along and make fun of me?" Billy sighed and Quinn jumped when his hand appeared, holding the tip of her chin.

"Helen Keller was deaf. You're not deaf." She blushed a little, realizing how silly he'd made it sound when she'd spent the entire day pained by it. "But ya definitely starvin', Squint." She jerked her head at the nickname and he quickly turned her back, a small smirk in his voice. "All right, all right, Quinn." A minute of quiet passed as Quinn deliberated. And as she did, Billy swiped his thumb back and forth on her chin, gently reminding her that he was waiting for a response.

"What about the rest?" She murmured, her anger waning with each passing second. _Tell me you're mine. _Billy stopped his caressing and said nothing. Then suddenly his mouth was a fraction of an inch from hers, the soft tease of his lips buzzing against her own.

"I kiss ya, Quinn…" He purred the words directly into her mouth, punctuating the sentence with the feather light graze of his tongue on her bottom lip. "…because I like it." His mouth captured hers in an unapologetically deep kiss. Cradling her jaw in one hand and messing her hair in another, Billy plunged his tongue into her mouth, taking her the way she'd imagined for days. The way she'd dreamt it. There was no hesitation in his actions. His hands pulled her closer as his teeth sinfully nibbled on soft flesh of her lower lip. Then he would plunge again, making her stomach flutter with delight. And he was enjoying himself too, letting little groans growl from the back of his throat as he hissed heavy breaths from his nose. _I'm yours._

Quinn knew he'd won.

But she'd had no idea how much until he pulled away and a small whine escaped from her lips. Billy didn't comment, but merely ran his thumb over her swollen mouth.

"…we both do." Then he opened her lips with his thumb, queuing another consuming plunge of his tongue. Quinn hesitantly answered with a flick of her own and Billy's hand flew to the curve of her back, pressing her lower body flush against his. And suddenly she was throbbing between her legs. The sensation from her dream pulsed through her belly, roaring in her chest like a blaze. The feeling shocked her so much, she jerked away, covering her swollen lips with a hand. Billy responded with a low purr of a laugh. "See?"

Boy did she. In the couple of seconds she'd been against Billy, he'd shown her exactly what he meant. Her thigh burned with the memory of being pressed against his hard body. And a very specific part of it had been difficult to miss at that point.

"I…" She stuttered, swiping hair away from her face. His arousal had turned her into a blubbering mess and suddenly she couldn't find the sharp retorts she'd thought up moments earlier. "That doesn't…" Her voice seemed strangled by the pulse rising in her throat.

"Relax." He said with a smirk. "It doesn't bite." She covered her cheeks with her hands, alarmed at the heat from her blushing. He was silent as she thought up a response.

"So…you lied. To your friends." Billy snorted.

"Hell ya I did." She ran a finger over her lip, sighing at his quick reply.

"It's that easy?" Quinn shot back, shaking her head. He snickered in the darkness.

"I was born to lie." Her logic screamed in panic at the notion. A born liar. What was preventing him from fooling her again? How in the world could she trust him?

"It doesn't change what you said." She whispered. Her heartbeat had finally slowed, falling into a rhythm of recollection. It had hurt to hear him laugh at her. She wouldn't be able to forget so easily.

"Christ. I told ya, Quinn…"

"You made me sound like a piece of meat." Her stomach burned as she remembered. _Break her in. _As she dwelled in the dark pit of the memory, Billy suddenly let out a laugh.

"Meat? I think ya mean piece of ass." She flinched and he groaned. "Aww come on, I'm kiddin'."

"What don't you understand?" Quinn snapped at him. "I felt like a degraded piece of trash, hiding as I listened to you talk about me like a…" _whore. _

"Nobody thinks you're trash." He snorted. "You're the fuckin' blind virgin Mary, for fuck's sake." That only made her angrier.

"My virginity is none of your business." She hissed. "You're just assuming." Billy coughed a surprised laugh.

"Really? I'm assuming?" His scent engulfed her as he swooped in close. "I don't even have to touch ya and you're hot as an oven."

"That doesn't mean anything." Quinn whispered quickly. But Billy purred a laugh through his teeth.

"It's nice." He murmured. "You're like a tuning fork." Her face flushed with renewed flame. _Wow. _

"And easily manipulated." She muttered. Billy sighed and backed away.

"Manipulated into what?" He grunted in frustration. Quinn couldn't answer, she was too afraid. He was so close to getting anything he wanted from her. He could sweep her off her feet and she would barely give him a fight.

"I don't know…doing whatever you want me to do." Billy snorted.

"And what, suddenly you're a dumbass?" She flinched and scrunched up her face. If she were braver, she would have pushed him.

"No. You're just…" She flung a hand out at him, her fingers flicking his chest in a flustered gesture. "…demanding. If you tell me to do something, I'm scared to say no, thinking you'll…" He stepped closer when she searched for a word. _Punish me? _

"I will never hit you." He growled angrily. Quinn blanched at his sudden fury.

"Well…" Her mind was blank and she felt very stupid. _Maybe you are a dumbass. _"…then just be rough." Billy let out a hard exhale.

"I like rough, but not like that." He sighed. "Christ you're makin' this into somethin' it's not. If ya don't trust me, whatever. I just came by to straighten this out." Billy adjusted his jacket, no doubt huffing in irritation. "Later." As he started to walk away, Quinn felt panic rise in her chest. _Later? Not see you? _Before she had even calculated the move, she had bolted forward and grabbed at him. Fortunately, her fingers closed around the sleeve of his jacket.

"Wait." Gathering her courage, she stood on her toes and pulled herself against his chest. Trailing her lips up his chin, she held her breath. "I'm sorry for hitting you." She whispered. He didn't give her a beat to continue. Billy ducked his head and caught her mouth, pressing her into his chest. In his arms, she was soaring. How could it be this way? In her books, the emotions were pretty and neat; here, she was stepping off a ledge, praying Billy wouldn't let her fall. She wanted him to treasure her the way the cowboys and war heroes did in her novels. And that wasn't going to happen; but she was going to take what she could get.

He made her crazy; he made her bold.

"I forgive you." She whispered into his lips, running her hands down his cheeks. They were rough, covered in short stubble. He snorted a small laugh and ran his hands down her back, dangerously close to her bottom.

"I gathered that." He purred. Quinn grinned and he cupped her butt in both hands. "Gotta say I wasn't expectin' this though." Billy added, nipping at her throat. She shivered in delight. _I want you. _

"I'm not as boring as you think." Her voice was throaty and confident. It was a whole new reality for her, being held in a man's embrace. Billy put her down on the ground and brought his hands to her face.

"You are not boring." His tone was serious and Quinn's heart slammed into her mouth. "Not to me." Billy kissed her soft and hard, deep and light, cupping her face like she was made of china.

And when they finally parted, he cleared his throat.

"I gotta go." Quinn frowned, disappointed. "Don't pout." He suddenly muttered. "Always fuckin' teasin' me with your mouth." Quinn's brows shot up in surprise. _Tease? _

"Sorry." She whispered. Billy purred a laugh from his chest and stepped away, his scent and warmth leaving her.

"I don't mind teasin'. Hell…" He dropped his voice and laughed again, sending bolts of need deep into Quinn's body. "…I don't mind ya hittin' me." Her face flushed with violent heat, her mind swimming in ideas. "But the sun's comin' up and I got shit ta do." He finished, his voice drifted further from her, towards the back gate.

"Okay." She said lamely, probably grinning like an idiot from the front step.

"See ya 'round, Quinn." His voice was almost an echo, so far from her that he felt like a memory.

"Bye, Billy." She murmured. When she was sure he was far away, she sighed, rubbing a hand across her lips. _I'm yours. _

* * *

><p><strong>Heh. Leave 'em if you liked! I love you all. <strong>


	6. Chapter 6

Most parents are hesitant when their child goes to a party. But not Quinn's parents. When she'd been invited -out of the blue- by Rebecca Shin to a house party, her parents had only protested for a few minutes. Quinn had barely had to fight them before they'd caved, her mother asking her questions about what she'd wear while her father repeated how happy he was that she'd made friends.

But Rebecca was only her lab partner. It all felt so forced. And yet, there she was, standing with her parents on the front porch. They stood on either side of her, rubbing their hands affectionately over her arms.

"Are you excited?" Her mother asked, gushing with pride. Their collective pride was utterly staggering. But it also said something for their trust in her. Quinn supposed she should be happy, but her gut told her to stay home. No good could come of this party.

"I guess…" She murmured to her mother, giving her a half smile. Her father was next, kissing the top of her head.

"Have fun, honey." Then there was the purr of an engine and she was off, sliding into the passenger's seat of Rebecca Shin's car, her cane clutched in her hand.

"Hey Quinn. You look cute." Rebecca was friendly enough, but Quinn couldn't help but notice there was a note of insincerity in her voice. She figured Rebecca just needed someone to go with, just so she wasn't alone. Why the cheerleader had picked her, she had no clue. But she didn't let it bother her. This was an experience she was going to have to treasure, because it probably wouldn't happen often in her life.

"Thanks." She brushed her hands over her skirt. Why her mother had chose for her to wear a skirt to a party. If anything, pants would have been a better choice. Many things could go wrong with a skirt. But even Quinn had to admit that she felt different in a skirt. It made her feel pretty. She didn't know what pretty looked like exactly, or cute for that matter, but she felt it. And she was finally feeling excited when Rebecca pulled away from the curb.

There wasn't much of a conversation at first. Rebecca seemed nervous. But when they did talk, Quinn asked her about cheerleading. And boy did Rebecca love that. She yammered about the upcoming competition and the newest tricks that they were practicing. Quinn just nodded and smiled as the girl used lingo she didn't recognize and giggled with excitement. But at least it wasn't uncomfortable silence.

"Here we areeee." Rebecca practically sang the words and Quinn kicked her feet a little. She was starting to understand the thrill. This wasn't a school function; there were no rules, no hall monitors, and no parents. There were only her peers, free to do as they pleased until the sun came up. This was a place to show who you really were, to make friends. _And see him. _Quinn took a deep breath as the car came to stop.

"You ready?" Rebecca asked cautiously. Her keys rattled as they came out of the ignition.

"As I'll ever be." Quinn breathed. Truthfully, she had never been more terrified and excited in the same instant.

* * *

><p>"DO YOU WANT A BEER LADIES?" There was no room for anything besides shouting above the music. It dominated the house, lighting up every surface with vibration. Quinn would have been able to walk around without trouble, had the house been empty. But the bodies filling every space cluttered her and she was constantly bumping people, her cane rendered useless.<p>

"SURE!" Rebecca screamed back, nudging Quinn's elbow in encouragement. "WE BOTH WILL." The boy, probably the host, floated away in the sea of breathing people. There was so much to hear it was distracting. Quinn could barely keep her mind on Rebecca as the girl tried to talk to her.

"WE SHOULD DANCE!" She shouted, taking Quinn's hand. Her stomach knotted several times over. Dancing was something she was never taught to do. She was capable; she'd just never learned. She didn't know what the people around her were doing, or what she was expected to mimic. It was nerve wrecking.

"Ummm, I don't know…" She tried to resist, but the pull to the dance floor took her along.

"IT'LL BE FUN!" Rebecca shouted. Quinn followed, but did nothing in the middle of the dance floor. It was worse than she had imagined. There were people touching her on all sides, numbing her sense of touch. She didn't know where one person started and another person ended. No part of her was spared a grope as the music changed and everyone grouped tighter. Rebecca held her hand for as long as possible, but someone broke between them and suddenly Quinn was alone.

Alone in a sea of strangers.

Anxiety started to soak into her skin, making her shake. This wasn't what she'd thought it would be. She was exposed, unprotected. This wasn't fun or free. Her chest started to compress and her mouth went dry.

"HERE'S YOUR DRINK." Rebecca was back without warning, shoving a plastic cup into Quinn's hand. She was so relieved to have her companion back, she took a larger sip than intended to cleanse her dry mouth.

The liquid burned down her throat like acid, threatening to make her vomit. She sputtered and Rebecca tapped her back.

"GOOD?" She nodded, taking a deep breath. _How on earth is that considered good?_ It tasted how paint thinner smelled. Bad and strong. If beer tasted like this, she was definitely not a beer drinker. "DRINK QUINN!" But Rebecca goaded her on, pushing on the bottom of the cup. The room started to chant around them.

"CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG." She didn't intend to do so, hoping that a polite second gulp would appease the crowd. But someone held the cup to her face, forcing more of the beer into her mouth than she'd wanted. And it scorched its way down, making her stomach turn. She gasped in disgust but the sound was drowned out by cheers.

It didn't take long for things to shift. The cup in her hand was heavy again and the room was ordering her to empty it. Quinn shook her head, but her mouth opened for more anyway. The taste started to cooperate with her tongue, numbing instead of burning when she tipped the cup to her lips. Then the game was fun. The cheering made her smile, the music made her happy. Slowly and steadily, she began to understand what a party was.

It was magic.

She was an exposed wire, alight with joy. It felt like stepping out of her skin and walking around on her nerves. Quinn couldn't stop laughing. Fantastic. If she could see, this is what it would feel like. She was sure of it. Everything in the room spoke, telling her what it was, where it was. They all had voices, calling out. The floor was growling, rolling around beneath her feet in a playful dance. Each wall had a different pitch, ringing like bells.

All the while, the music had started to leak into her chest, gripping her heart in an iron fist. It pumped the blood through her veins; it commanded her lungs. She couldn't breathe unless it was in rhythm. Quinn let out a giggle of glee. This was better than anything she'd ever felt.

"What the fuck?" Her skin ignited as a hand closed around her wrist. She wiggled and almost lost her balance. The music was getting hard to resist, dragging her around the room.

"QUINN! HOW MUCH HAVE YOU DRANK?" The music had a lovely voice. It was deep and familiar, petting her insides like a soft hand. She smiled and let it take her away from the hardwood floor. The floor whined to her, telling her to come back, but she waved farewell with a grin. Everything loved her and she loved everything. "Christ." The rhythm shifted and she was swept off her feet entirely, held up by the blazing vocals.

"Quinn!" Right in her ear. Flinching, she tried to swim away. This song wasn't as good as the last. "Bag, get the door. Jesus." There was loud thud and she screamed. Definitely not her favorite song.

She was outside. The cool air felt wonderful on her skin, licking the sweat that was misted all over her body. Then she was in the grass, the blades in between her toes. It was quieter here and her head started to feel heavy. Like a bowling ball, it weighed down her spine, tilting her forward.

"Puke it up." Her hands had a mind of their own, her own fingers creeping into her mouth. She fought them off, pushing and whining but they were insistent. "Quinn, fuckin' listen ta me. Ya need ta puke." Her mind cleared for a moment; like when a storm parts to let the sun through, moments before the lightning slashes through the air.

"Billy?" She called for him but her fingers blocked her throat. And then she was wrenching forward, falling to the soft grass below.

Her body seized over and over as she fought for air. Her chest burned, her back ached, and her legs felt like rubber. But she wasn't touching the ground. Her knees were hanging just above the surface below, kissing the cold grass as her body wracked.

"Breathe." He was in the back of her head, instructing from the dark. The word was repeated until it sounded like a lullaby. Then he was quiet.

"Billy." Her head throbbed and her eyes filled with tears. "I can't—" Another heave ended her sentence in a violent sputter.

"You're okay." He coaxed gently. His voice was a part of her, humming through her body. "Bodie, find that Paxton prick." She dropped her head. It was too heavy, full of fog. Billy was angry with her; it was obvious. Tears came without warning, dripping down her nose like rain.

"Billy I'm sorry." Her voice was loud, even in her own ears. "Don't be mad." He pulled her upright, his arm around her waist as he released the hold on her ponytail.

"Relax." He purred. "And quit yellin'." She nodded and reached for his face. How did he get there? Where was she?

"Baggy, watch her." His body vanished and she was being led away. The hands on her were foreign, hesitantly touching her shoulders.

"Don't step in ya puke." The voice was unfamiliar as well, muttering as they walked. She whimpered and suddenly her legs didn't feel like standing. Her knees buckled and she went limp. "Holy fuck." The voice was behind her, her body weight caught before her butt hit the ground. Then, carefully she was lowered to the grass.

"PAXTON GET YA FUCKIN' ASS OUT HERE!" Quinn winced as Billy roared, filling her head with his fury. The music dipped and she curled up on her side. Could she sleep in the grass? It was soft. "Get 'er outta here." Billy snarled from nearby and suddenly there were people everywhere.

"Can ya lift her?" A younger voice originated from her left.

"Think so." The other voice, Baggy, answered and suddenly his hands were on her. She wormed away.

"I can sleep here." He gave an amused snort. Like Billy. "Billy I'll sleep here." She cooed into the grass, petting it like the fur of a dog.

"Sorry darlin', but it's time ta go." Two hands became four and she whined.

"Nooo Billy." His voice was nearby. He was yelling, but the words were sloshed together. Quinn left the ground and something warm was surrounding her. It was firm, swaying her slightly. A cradle. She slackened and followed the sway, her head lulling to the beat. "I'll sleep now." Quinn whispered, nuzzling into the comforting cradle.

"You do that." Baggy's reply faded into the background; and then there was silence.

* * *

><p>She didn't wake gracefully. Her head was ringing as it startled her upright like an alarm clock. But the movement made her body protest angrily, screaming until she pressed her hands to her ears and fell back into the soft surface below.<p>

"Take it easy." His voice sounded fuzzy, but Quinn knew him instantly.

"Billy." She croaked like an ancient frog. "Billy." His hands closed around her shoulders.

"Yeah. It's me." Quinn sucked down air like it was in short supply and whimpered.

"Where am I? Billy, where am I?" Tears started to roll down her cheeks and she shuddered. He shushed her softly, gripping her tighter.

"Quinn, relax. Relax." She took a deep breath. He was close, his breath fanning over her forehead. "You're okay." Quinn shuddered and reached for his face.

"What happened to me?"

"Ya got shitfaced and puked all over Paxton's backyard." He was laughing a little as he told her. She found his smile with her fingers.

"You're laughing?" She hissed, pushing his face away. "Why are you laughing…" Her voice choked and she sobbed, her chest heaving. "Where am I?" Panic flooded her until she couldn't even form words. Nothing added up. She didn't remember how her head had gotten so heavy. She didn't remember why her throat burned.

"Jesus." Billy moved away and something soft covered her mouth and nose. A pillow. She thrashed but he held her in place. "BREATHE!" His bellow startled her into stillness and she obeyed, taking hard, deep breaths. It was slower with the corner of pillow over her mouth, but the warm air filled her lungs. In and out. The panic ebbed with each breath and she listened as her heart slowed in her chest. She was with Billy. She wasn't alone.

"Ya done screaming?" He sounded like an irritated parent. And she eventually nodded. The pillow eased off her face and she took a new breath of fresh air, swallowing to moisten her throat.

"Where am I?" She whispered. Her body was slightly upright, laying back on a cushioned surface. Running her palms over the material at her sides, her fingers did the seeing for her. A comforter. Stiff and heavily starched.

"A motel." Billy murmured. He shifted and his weight dipped beside her. She was on a bed, lying back on rigid pillows. Sitting up slowly, her heart started to race for another reason. A motel room, alone.

"Why are we here?" She was careful to ask it calmly, shifting away from him. Her head was pounding and she couldn't remember much of anything. All she remembered was Rebecca and music.

"Ya got sick. I found ya." He sounded tired, like he didn't feel like explaining himself. Or admitting to what he'd done. "I brought ya here. Figured ya didn't want to end up passed out and piss drunk on your front stoop." She processed his words with deep, cleansing breaths. He was right about one thing; she definitely didn't want that.

"Found me?" Billy sighed then snorted lightly.

"You were wasted on the dance floor, gettin' groped. I dragged ya outside and ya puked and passed out." She covered her face and a blushed. There were bits and pieces rising to the surface in her head. The grass. The taste of beer. Billy's voice, echoing in the distance.

"Oh god." She whimpered. "I'm so stupid." He was closer again, his body heat warming the thigh of her left leg from where he sat.

"Nah. You're just a lightweight." Billy snickered and suddenly her bitterness was back full force. He thought it was funny?

"Is this entertaining you?" She snapped, folding her knees so she could hug them to her chest.

"I can see your underwear." Quinn shot her legs back down, blushing furiously for forgetting her skirt. Then the tears started up again and she wished to disappear, dissolve into nothing on the cheap bedspread. "Christ, it's not a big deal."

"Of course it is!" She wept. "I've never felt this…this…" Her arms hovered in the air as she searched for a true description. "…helpless and stupid." She flopped her arms down and Billy sighed.

"You're not stupid." He mumbled.

"I know better than this!" She snapped, wiping her cheeks furiously. "I'm blind!" Billy grunted and his body weight shifted closer, up to her waist. They were nearly sitting side by side.

"Stop cryin'." She wheezed another sob but hissed it through her teeth in frustration.

"I'm sorry, am I making you uncomfortable?" Her words were laced with misplaced anger. She was angry about her own poor decision-making, not Billy. Although, waking up in a strange motel with him wasn't helping his case.

"No, but cryin' is fuckin' annoying. Doesn't solve anything." She sighed and slumped forward, dropping her head into her hands. It was useless trying to get him to understand. Billy was the strongest person she knew; he wouldn't be able to fathom the terror she felt, waking up in a strange place without her memory. "Hey, it's over." He suddenly pointed out. Quinn heaved a long, stuttered inhale then sighed it out.

"Last night is over. Right now, ya safe. Ya didn't get hurt. Ya didn't get in trouble. It's just you and me." It was incredible what a simple declaration it was. Yet it made her feel better immediately. He was right. Sure, she'd been startled, her head hurt, she felt like an idiot, and she was in a strange place. But she was safe. And he had helped her.

_Whoa. _Billy Darley had come to her rescue, quite literally.

"How long have I been…" She blushed, wondering if he'd been with her the entire time she had been unconscious.

"Few hours." Quinn nodded. Rubbing her arms, she took a moment to adjust to her surroundings properly. It was warm enough, even though the comforter seemed to stick uncomfortably to her bare legs. The room sounded like a reasonable size and an air conditioner churned from somewhere on her right. Taking a deep breath, she made a face.

"Cigarettes and…" she inhaled again and wrinkled her nose. "…pizza." Billy snorted.

"But it's mine." He purred. She blushed and swept her hair away, embarrassed by the bumps and strays she could feel hanging out of her ponytail.

"You own this?" She muttered, adjusting her skirt as well. Everything on her was a mess. Billy moved and his scent was suddenly near.

"I sorta own the manager. So yeah." He was bragging, his voice oozing with pride. Wrinkling her nose, Quinn tilted her head to one side.

"Own?" Billy gave a low, gravelly chuckle in the back of his throat and she swallowed, her heart speeding.

"Own." He repeated. Quinn blushed and shook her head. This is what he liked to do, make it impossible for her to read him. It was like he was testing her, seeing if he could beat her detection. Sighing softly through her nose, Quinn gave up.

"I need the bathroom." She murmured. "I'm disgusting." Billy snorted.

"Yeah, ya are." With a lurch, she stood, frowning as he chuckled at her from below.

"Thanks." She muttered, reaching out to feel around the room. Knowing full well where he was, Quinn ghosted her fingers over Billy's shoulder. He sat up straighter as she dropped her hand down his arm and to the edge of the bed. Tracing it's length, she rounded the corner and then crossed the end, jutting her arm out in search of another landmark. A wall. Straightening, she followed it around a sharp corner until she hit a doorframe.

"There's soap and whatever in the shower." Billy murmured, watching, no doubt, as she discovered the bathroom. Quinn hid an irritated scowl. She probably looked stupid, groping around.

"Thanks for showing me." She muttered. Billy snorted and the bed gave a squeak, his boots thumping softly over the motel carpet.

"What, ya need help in there?" Quinn's heart vaulted into her throat as he approached.

"No." She said it too quickly and regretted it immediately. Another thing he liked to do: get a rise out of her. But her flushed face would have revealed that, regardless of her quick reply or not. He came to stop in the doorway as she felt around the sink, the toilet, and then a small shower stall. It was a tiny bathroom so it was easy to navigate.

"Ya sure?" He purred. _Oh that voice._ She turned away to hide her face, pretending to inspect the contents of the towel racks.

"Positive." She bit her lip to keep from giggling. Billy was so different when he was alone with her and it made her nervous, stupidly so. A few months ago he'd made her nervous out of fear. Now, it was a different story.

"If ya fall 'n die, it's not on me." He grunted. But even with his flat voice, she knew he was smiling at her. Quinn put a palm on the bathroom wall, feeling her way back to the door. Walking confidently, she didn't hide her smile.

"I've got it." Then, without missing a beat, she closed the door, careful not to slam it in his face. When the lock clicked into place, he laughed from the other side.

"Don't trust me?" Quinn dropped her skirt in a hurry, whipped her top over her head.

"Nope." She replied sweetly, releasing her stupid grin from its cage. But in her head, she was quickly coming to a different conclusion. Despite Billy's wicked reputation and his playful words, she knew he wouldn't do anything. He'd proven that he was more than what people thought.

And Quinn trusted him.

* * *

><p>The water felt incredible. Her arms had been sticky and her hair had been matted in several places, but under the stream of water she felt brand new. Sure, the state of the shower was probably disgusting, but she wasn't going to investigate that. After her own state of disarray, she was glad to have the hot water and soap. She scrubbed everything and even gurgled with some lather. It wasn't pleasant, but her mouth felt clean. And she had reason to be concerned with how her mouth would taste.<p>

After cleaning herself quickly, she frantically tried to comb her hair with her fingers as she redressed. She wasn't sure how she was going to explain herself to her parents, but she was beginning to understand that she was lucky. Lucky that she wasn't, indeed, dumped on her front lawn. Or worse, that she was still at that party, lost in her own head. She winced at the blurry memory of that house.

The longer she thought about it, the clearer it became. Billy had swooped in and saved her. Literally. His voice was her only beacon in that foggy memory. He hadn't been happy, at all. But he'd been there. Her face flushed at the meaning. He cared enough to keep her safe. To bring her here. When she was clean and presentable, her heart started to drum in her chest. They were in a motel room together, alone.

"You're one stupid sonofabitch." Billy's voice growled through the door and Quinn froze, at his tone. Was he talking to himself? About her?

"Look Billy, I'm sorry. I thought he was cool." Her breath stopped as an unfamiliar voice replied through the thin bathroom door. Stepping closer, she listened and turned the lock in silence.

"Big problem there, slick, idiots can't think. Bones told me I should pop ya, just to send a message." Her blood turned to ice in her veins. _Pop? _This was a Billy she was not acquainted with. The fury in his voice was nothing close to the tone he'd used behind the school. Whoever was in the room with him was in serious hot water, and she didn't know if she should be more afraid for herself, or for Billy's victim.

"Please, Billy. Do—Don't k-kill me. I promise it'll never happen again." It took every fiber of her control to hold in the terror that pooled in her chest. Kill. Billy was going to kill someone.

"Damn straight it won't." Billy snarled, his voice dipping lower and lower with each word. He sounded like an animal, coiling for an attack. "If ya come sniffin' around here, or if I catch ya circlin' the corner, ya done." She held a hand over her mouth. Her head couldn't begin to compute the scene unfolding on the other side of that door. A minute ago, she held no fear towards Billy Darley. Now, she was shaking at the very sound of him. "Get out." He growled. And just like that, the room was silent and everything slowed.

A few seconds later, he called to her. "Ya might as well come out." Trying to control her shaky fingers and frantic heart, she opened the door and showed herself.

"I didn't mean to eavesdrop." Damage control. She wanted to be on his good side, at least until she could leave. Billy sighed and sunk onto the bed, the mattress releasing a telling creak.

"I don't care." He muttered. "But could ya quit lookin' like I'm gonna eat ya?" She swallowed and nodded, doing her best to calm down. _I would never hit ya._ His words came back and were whispered in her ear, reminding her of who he was. This wasn't someone who wanted to hurt her. Why was she so afraid?

"Sorry." Quinn murmured. "You're intimidating." _Remember?_ She'd confessed this to him once already. Didn't he understand how frightening he could be?

"That's the point." He grunted back. "No one'll do what ya say if they aren't afraid of ya." She nodded again, her fingers rubbing back and forth on the trim around the door.

"So he works for you too?" Quinn asked carefully, wondering if that was too nosey a question.

"Bought from me." He muttered back. _Drugs._ She hid the disappointment she felt. The rumors were true. Of course they were; they'd been awful rumors.

"Oh." It was all she could think up. Then they were silent, on opposite ends of a room. She wanted to ask him all sorts of things, but she kept the questions down. Asking too much was bad news. Yet, she somehow figured he'd tell her. He snorted bitterly and her heart lurched.

"Oh?" Quinn fiddled with her hands, standing awkwardly in dead space.

"I just —"

"What'd ya think I did here? Sell magazines?" His voice was steadily growing venomous. "Only people who work outta motel rooms are whores and dealers, sweetheart." Then he gave a dark laugh, empty and cold. "And I don't charge for sex." Quinn blushed and instinctively took a step back. But she didn't count on clipping her heel on a doorstop. In a matter of seconds, her balance was completely thrown and she was flailing and twisting, reaching out to grab onto anything as she headed for the floor.

With a hard slam, she landed on her hands and knees, her elbows buckling from the impact. Rolling, she ended up on her back, knees and palms burning from the carpet.

"Christ, Quinn." In the matter of seconds it had taken for her to fall, he'd crossed the room to her side. She flushed from embarrassment and battled another round of tears.

"I'm okay." She murmured, turning on her side to push herself to her feet. But before she had her bearings, his hands slid under her knees and across her back. And then she was in the air.

"Why the hell don't ya have your cane?" His chest vibrated on her arm as he held her close, carrying her a few strides before setting her on the bed. He was so gentle that she blushed even further, her humiliation filling her eyes with tears.

"I did. But I must have lost it…" Her voice sounded choked and Billy sat beside her, the bed dipping from his weight. "I'm so sorry." She didn't really know what else to say. He'd gone out of his way for her and it was obvious he didn't want her there. And now that he'd seen how weak she was, he'd never want to see her again.

"I'm not mad at ya for losin' your cane." Billy murmured. "I just want ya to stop gettin' hurt…Jesus are you cryin' again?" His question broke the dam and Quinn whimpered in an attempt to muffle a sob. She was acting ridiculous. Her head knew that, but her heart was wrapped up in how helpless she'd allowed herself to become.

"I'm sorry." She whimpered, trying her best to brush the tears away.

"Quit sayin' sorry. Why are ya cryin'? Do ya need ice?" He shifted on the bed and Quinn frowned.

"Ice?" The tears slowed in a moment of confusion. Then Billy's fingers appeared on her right leg, just above her knee, and she froze.

"It doesn't look too bad." He murmured. The pads of his fingers brushed lower and a string radiated through her thigh. Involuntarily, a response burst from her lips.

"Ow." She managed to stifle a childish yelp of pain, settling for a short whine. Billy sighed and the he was up, the bed jolting her around on the springs as he left. There was a quick moment of rummaging and he was back. But he didn't sit beside her.

"It's just a scrape. Nothin' fatal." From the angle of his voice, he had to be kneeling. Right between her legs. The position startled her and Quinn jumped back on the bed, snapping her legs together as she tugged on the hem of her dress.

"What are you doing?" She asked. Billy snorted and a big hand wrapped around her right calf, sliding her forward again on the mattress.

"Just hold still." Her heart pounded and her tears dried, the embarrassment she'd felt long forgotten. He was holding her leg in his palm, the warm skin of his hand caressing the soft underside of her knee. Tingling goosebumps shot up her thighs and she didn't even feel him rubbing her scrape. Her pain had all but vanished.

"Antibiotic?" She whispered, her blood racing through her veins and pooling in her stomach. "You had this on hand?" He chuckled softly through his teeth, the air hitting her knee over the cool gel. _Can he see up my skirt?_ Her dream suddenly invaded her thoughts, the memory of his face hovering over her legs, just a little further north…

"Not the first time I've had ta clean up a cut." Billy's voice brought her back to the present, his fingers leaving her knee and his hand slowly falling away. In her head, she was disappointed. But she hid it well, clearing her throat and running her fingers through her hair.

"Thanks." His heavy boots clomped around the room and back, ending as he sat beside her once again.

"This hole is kinda my home away from home." She frowned.

"You live here?"

"Most of the time." Her chest panged with a mystery emotion. Sadness? Pity?

"Can I ask why?" She was treading the line again, but he seemed to relax, the mattress protesting as he laid down beside her.

"Sure." Turning her head, she grinned. He was playing with her. Lightening the mood.

"Why?" She asked with a smile and Billy chuckled in his chest. It was a warmer laugh than before. Quinn wanted to curl up next to him, feel that true laughter in her bones.

"Cuz livin' with the old man sucks. And I needed ta get out." She nodded, playing with her hands in her lap. He was living in a sleazy motel because he didn't want to live with his father. "I'll get my own place soon, though." He seemed to read her thoughts. "Someplace for Joe and me." Quinn turned her head to him again.

"Joe?" Billy sat up and suddenly they were face to face.

"My brother." She nodded, turning her head away. The minute he was that close, she was a blushing, flustered mess. But he was talking to her, and she didn't want to ruin the moment with her obvious attraction.

"I didn't know you had one." He snorted.

"Yeah. He's eleven." Quinn's brows shot up in surprise. That was five years younger than both of them.

"Wow." She breathed. All her life she'd wanted a sibling. But five years of an age difference would have made things difficult. There was such a gap.

"Yeah. I look out for him." Quinn smiled. No wonder Billy was so gentle with her. He was used to taking care of his brother, probably for years.

"He's lucky." She commented. Billy laughed and the sound rang under her skin. He sounded truly happy.

"Tell him that." Billy snorted, shifting around on the comforter. "I get him outta one mess and he's fuckin' makin' another." She giggled.

"What does he do?"

"Fights." Billy grunted. Quinn laughed at his tone. Now he sounded like a disgusted parent. It was ridiculous how hypocritical that was. Billy would punch a kid for looking at him the wrong way. But he sounded irritated that his little brother would do the same. "That idiot always ends up beat ta hell with the biggest fucker in the school kickin' his ribs in." Suddenly there wasn't any humor in the situation. Quinn quieted as the blood rushed from her face. No wonder Billy was intimidating. He had to be. Not just for himself, but in order to protect his brother. She didn't want to know what kind of injuries he'd had to clean up in that motel.

"So why does he do it?" She was gentle when she pressed, ready to back down. But, to her surprise, he answered.

"It's what everyone expects." Her chest panged again.

"That's unfair." She whispered. Billy snorted softly through his nose.

"That's how it is."

They sat in silence for a long while, the air conditioning groaning in a corner. When Quinn built up enough courage, she turned to him and spoke.

"I wish I had a brother like you." It was bold. God, it sounded stupid. But she meant it. And it wasn't something Billy would take lightly. She knew that now.

"I don't wanna be your brother." Billy replied. Quinn almost flinched, until she heard the subtle purr in his tone. Then her heart fell into her stomach. Sliding over the comforter, he moved closer until their legs were touching, forced together from the dip in the bed. She held still, almost trembling as he grew closer.

"Well, I didn't mean you exactly." She whispered. His fingers brushed over her jaw and Quinn's breath deepened. He barely had to touch her and she was lost.

"There's no one like me." Billy purred. His lips were right there, inches from her own. And suddenly she was _so_ glad she'd gurgled soap. She hungrily closed the distance, rotating her body so she could touch his hair. Billy gave a deep growl and her skin erupted in a shudder. There certainly wasn't anyone like Billy Darley. With him, she felt the urge to break the rules. She wanted to kiss him; she wanted to touch him. Around everyone else she was reserved and contained in her quiet persona. With Billy, she wanted to live up to the groans that he was grunting into her mouth.

Her hand weaved into his hair and she held onto the nape of his neck, pulling him deeper until she was drinking in pure Billy. He was warm, heating her skin like a flame everywhere he touched her. His hands were on her face at first, cradling her jaw and caressing her neck. But as she demanded more, a wildness seemed to unravel in him. Billy's movements became rougher, his big palms pulling her torso against his, flatting his solid pecks to her chest. She hesitated for a moment as his body rubbed against her own. Her breasts were so small that she felt like nothing padded him from her ribs. She wasn't a lush, curvy girl. Eventually he'd notice what little she had to offer and he'd lose interest. Billy Darley wasn't going to be content with kissing forever. A flush broke out over Quinn's face and she hesitated.

And that was enough.

"What?" His voice was rabid, his breath panting over her cheek as she turned her head away. "You good?" She nodded, her face scalding beneath the surface. "Then why did ya stop?" He asked softly, cupping her face to brush his lips across her chin. _Because I'm scared of disappointing you._

"I'm sorta new at this…" She whispered, her pulse choking her voice when she tried to speak. Billy groaned.

"Trust me. You're plenty good at it." His tone was strained, needy, and it made her smile a little. But the nagging insecurity badgered from deep in her stomach. He was beautiful. She'd felt his face. She'd felt his hard chest and soft hair. Billy was perfect.

"Billy…" One of his hands was still drifting down her side, fingertips pressing into her skin through the material of the t-shirt as he held her close. She was practically sitting in his lap. His chest hummed as his lips scattered kisses over her neck.

"Hmm."

"…am I…pretty?" It sounded like a childish thing to ask. Quinn felt self-absorbed and ashamed the moment the question left her mouth. Her mother told her she was beautiful all the time; why was she so insecure? His arms were around her, mouth covering every inch of exposed skin. _Exposed. He can reject you. He can leave. _

She didn't want to lose him. Billy groaned into her neck and she shivered. But it didn't answer her question. When he lifted his head, she held very still, afraid of what he might say. _No, you're just easy. _

"You're serious?" He grunted, almost angrily. Then he snorted and leant back, pulling her body with him. Billy sighed and she felt his frustration. "Can I just kiss ya without ya overthinkin' it?"

All her fears sunk into her belly. He was done with her. She'd blocked him and now he was…

Suddenly his hand held her face and he brought her ear to his mouth. Purring low and rough, he spoke against her cheek.

"I'm tryin' not ta jump ya right now, Quinn. You do that to me." She swallowed, her hand shaking as she wove it into his hair.

"I do?" Her breath was in short supply. It took an eternity for her lungs to fill. Billy laughed into her neck and she shivered.

"If I told ya what ya make me want to do, I'd scare ya." Quinn grinned, blushing wildly. Billy was not the romantic type, showering her with poetic compliments. Yet this was giving her the esteem she needed.

But she wasn't going to get anything more specific. Unless…Her impulses took over and Quinn tugged on the roots of his hair, pulling his mouth away from her neck. Everything was screaming around her: the air, his skin, her skin, the feel of his breath fanning over her face. She was drunk again, on control.

"Tell me anyway." Her voice was deeper than before, the wispy fright gone in a moment of lust. _Who am I and what just happened to the old Quinn?_ Billy groaned so loudly she was sure the neighbors could hear.

"Fuck." That was his only reply. His hands shot to her waist, turning them both as he leant upright. He pinned her to his body while he took her down, her back meeting the comforter in a soft but deliberate bounce. His mouth was everywhere.

On her throat, across her collarbone, and her lips. And he was hungry. His breathing was frenzied and heavy, filling her lungs as he inserted his tongue with deep, deliberate plunges. Quinn clawed at his back and hung on his neck, instinct taking over in place of experience.

When he did finally speak again, his was over her, panting like he'd run a marathon.

"I want to push up this shirt…" His thumbs teased the hem of her top, raising it a fraction of an inch on her stomach, exposing her boiling skin to the cool air. Quinn tugged on him and Billy happily kissed her, opening his mouth to her tongue. She was so high, a giddy smile on her lips when he pulled away again. "…and lick every inch." He finished the sentence, shifting his weight away and down. She panted in surprise when she felt his lips on the small patch of skin, his tongue dipping down to flick across the hot flesh.

"Billy." She whispered his name like a prayer, gripping his t-shirt for dear life. He returned to her, kissing her neck.

"I want to feel ya here…" His hands drifted down her sides and around to her butt, his big palms cupping both cheeks through her skirt. Her body reacted on it's own, arching from the bed to meet his chest. Billy pressed a hand into the small of her back and kept her against him, his second hand drifting lower until it touched the bare skin of her thigh. Quinn shivered and held on to his back. Her ability to shy from him was gone. This was too good, too addicting. She wanted him to do it all. She wanted him. Her head dropped back and she let a moan whine from her lips. He was caressing her bare leg, pulling it up until her knee brushed his jeans.

"What else?" She panted. More. She had to have more. After a beat, he lowered her leg and upper body, his embrace completely leaving her. But his breathing hovered over her chest.

"I want these." His thumbs brushed over her nipples without warning and Quinn jumped in surprise. She had only worn a strapless cotton bra beneath her party top, so his fingers felt so close, like he'd already stripped her bare. Billy didn't move for a moment and Quinn realized he was waiting for a reaction, seeing if he'd crossed the line. He was waiting for her to bolt. _Which is what a responsible girl would do._

"Why?" She wasn't insecure, per say. She just didn't understand. Her boobs barely fit into A cups. On a good day, she could feel a little bounce when she moved. But otherwise, they were way below average. She couldn't wear lingerie like the other girls, buying their new bras from Victoria's Secret.

"Why?" Billy repeated her question, pretending to ponder it as he massaged her ribs, just below her breasts.

"They're small." She pouted with a hidden grin, playing with his hair. God, it was soft. He growled in the back of his throat and he leaned up, kissing her mouth quickly with bruising intensity.

"Tits are tits, Quinn." He purred, kissing a trail down her chin, neck and collarbone, heading straight for her sternum. "And yours are happy to see me." He teased. His thumbs brushed her nipples again and she whimpered. "I want ta put them in my mouth." Something happened inside of her. Something molten and liquid. She'd never felt anything like it. It made her want to moan continuously. Or praise God for Billy Darley.

He kissed her, slow and deep, pulling her up to his chest again and holding her close. He tasted her, patiently giving her access to him. Their mouths danced and their breath mingled. And slowly something changed. Billy pulled away and pressed his forehead to hers.

"I want ya, Quinn." If she hadn't already been running at two hundred degrees, Quinn would have glowed. It was her most guarded wish, coming true. She would have spun in place if she'd been vertical.

"I want you too." She whispered back, stroking his stubbly face. His perfect face. Billy grinned, the muscles in his cheeks moving under her hands.

"Then I'd better put ya down." Her elation froze midair, all momentum vanishing from the sails.

"What?" She murmured in confusion as he sat upright, taking her with him. Billy snorted.

"Tonight was a mess." He stated bluntly, scooting away on the bed and standing, his weight vanishing from the mattress. "I broke a kid's nose for spikin' your beer. I had ta shove your own fingers down ya throat." Quinn blushed, her insecurity ripping back into her bones with a vengeance.

"Oh God…" She turned away, hiding herself from him. What in the world was wrong with her?

"Christ, Quinn. We all fuck up." He walked around the corner of the bed to find her face. "I just don't wanna make it worse." Frowning, she nodded.

"You're right." Impulsive was the last thing she needed to be after the night she'd had. And it was Billy Darley, of all people, pointing that out. Wasn't he supposed to be a raging manwhore?

"Don't pout." He snorted at her. "Because I want to. Fuck, I want to." She lost her frown and a new blush filled her cheeks. She liked the way his voice had sounded strained again. "But I'm not doin' that, with you, here."

"Oh." _Yeah, a motel isn't very romantic._ God, she was glad he'd been able to think of these things. How his brain had been functioning when he was on top of her was a mystery.

"And if ya touch me much more, I'm gonna ruin my boxers like a fuckin' twelve-year-old."

If her face was warm before, it was broiling then. She covered her mouth to hold in a nervous laugh. _Wow._

"So I'm takin' a shower. Then I'm takin' ya home." Billy stated, his boots clomping across the floor. Quinn nodded.

"Thanks." She was grinning from ear to ear. Ruin his boxers…that made her feel more seductive than a siren.

There was a thump, then another. A zip.

"Wipe that smirk of your face, Squint." He sneered. A swish of denim. Another whoosh of fabric. Then he chuckled in the back of his throat.

"Are you naked?" Quinn practically shrieked at him when she heard his belt clamor to the floor. Billy chuckled again, a promising purr leaking from his lips.

"And primed, baby." He was using her blindness against her! She gasped, unable to hide her shocked blush and huge smile. "Too bad ya can't see me."

He gave her no time to retort, the bathroom door clicking shut as the shower stuttered to life. Quinn put a hand over her heart, begging her pulse to slow.

* * *

><p>…<strong>.excuse me while I hide in a corner and pray you all don't hate me. <strong>

**Because I love all of you. Especially my reviewers. :D I appreciate you anon's more than you'll ever know! [Hi Elektra!] THANK YOU! HUGS FOR YOU ALL!**

**All hail Lisa, my muse for this story…and hopefully many more. ;)**


	7. Chapter 7

This couldn't be real.

That's what Quinn kept telling herself, her mind unwilling to accept what her senses demanded was reality.

Because reality didn't go like this. Real life had rules, limitations. Real life had truths that you couldn't escape.

#1: Billy Darley was NOT her boyfriend.

That was the truth.

But the truth didn't matter. The entire school thought he was and that trumped the truth. Quinn Smith, blind and utterly plain in everyone's eyes, was Billy Darley's girl.

The night Billy had dragged her out of the party, her status as a nobody had been shattered. She was officially a somebody. A somebody that mattered.

#2: She was NOT popular.

Tell that to the thirteen –count them– thirteen girls who'd complimented her shirt in a single day. One day. Thirteen people. She'd gone from invisible to neon in a weekend. No one made fun of her in the locker room; instead they were talking to her. They asked her about herself, about being blind. They included her in mindless chatter. And they asked for her opinion.

Un. Real.

#3: She was NOT sexy.

It was as if someone had rewritten the definition of "sexy" in the dictionary and had forgotten to clue Quinn in. At her locker, she could hear the voices of boys, commenting on her body. And the things they were saying made her want to hide every inch of her skin under a parka. She tried to blame it on her new status as forbidden fruit. Everyone will suddenly want what they can't have. But she couldn't help but notice the very specific qualities she was being praised for. Her hair, her legs…and other parts of her anatomy that she'd never imagined were above average.

But that was nothing compared to what happened after school.

#4: Billy Darley did NOT wait for her in the parking lot.

* * *

><p>"You always take the bus?" His voice startled Quinn, causing her jump and grip her cane with white knuckles.<p>

"My god." She whispered, fighting off a laugh as Billy snorted at her reaction. "Do you always sneak up on people?"

"Most people see me coming." He purred back, his voice laced with a smirk. Quinn shook her head, trying to act normal around him despite the crazy notion that everyone thought they were dating.

In order to date someone, you have to go on…an actual date.

"Blind jokes. Original." She teased, biting a lip to hold back her giddy grin. His body bumped into hers as they walked, his low laugh lingering in the air between them.

"It's either that or I call ya Squint." Quinn slumped her shoulders.

"Is there a reason you're harassing me?" She asked, feigning irritation. Billy gave a short laugh through his nose.

"I wanna show ya somethin'." Before she could respond, he was leading her away by her elbow, allowing the continued use of her cane as they went. Obviously he'd remembered the first time he'd forced her to follow him and knew better than to take away her ability to guide herself. This courtesy struck Quinn, the unsaid flustering her more than she would have ever expected.

"Are you taking me somewhere?" She asked quietly, excited at the prospect of being driven around by someone other than her mother. That promised not only a more interesting destination, but a companion who made her wild with anticipation. A trip to the grocery with her mom would pale in comparison.

"Kinda." The vague answer set her grin free. He was teasing. They continued walking in silence, voices chattering around them as people flooded into the parking lot. But eventually Billy slowed, his grip on her elbow vanishing. "You probably don't remember the first time ya rode in my car." He murmured into her ear, waiting as Quinn held out a hand to feel for the vehicle. Her palm met the hot surface and she smiled.

"No memory whatsoever." Billy laughed and a touch grazed her arm, making the hair stand on end.

"The second time was better." He whispered. Quinn blushed. The night of the infamous party, Billy had ended up taking her back to her house. The drive had been full of heavy silence and tension, their chemistry bordering on ridiculous. But to make things worse, when he'd dropped her off a block from her house, Billy had leaned over her from the driver's seat, leaving incredible kisses from her lips to her throat. She'd nearly collapsed in her front lawn.

As she recalled the feeling with a delicious burn in her stomach, Billy moved closer until he was flush against her side.

"Careful." She murmured quietly, running her fingers over the warm metal hood of his car. "People already think you're my boyfriend."

"Course they do." Billy snorted, his body weight settling beside her on the car. Quinn blushed further, nervously playing with a length of her hair. For a moment, he sounded irritated, which she could understand. This was Billy Darley, notorious bad boy. Being associated with her probably brought him down several hundred points on the social food chain.

"Sorry." She whispered, almost to herself.

"Quinn, I broke a kid's nose for ya. Don't do that often." Billy shot back, sliding closer until she could feel his hand near hers on the hood. Then it was gliding up her arm to her shoulder so he could pull her into his chest, his breath was brushing over her neck. The warm air sent small shudders up her spine and she couldn't help but grin. God, he felt good.

"I never did thank you for that." Quinn said, breathless as Billy took her chin in a hand to tilt her in his direction. He'd never touched her like this in front of anyone. It made her heart skip and her stomach flutter. If she thought the rumors were bad now, they'd be terrible tomorrow.

"Yeah ya did." He purred the words into her cheek, his lips like satin against her skin. "Remember the motel?" She had to lean against him to keep from falling, her knees suddenly too wobbly to stand.

"Of course I do." Quinn stuttered. Remembered? She didn't just remember, she fantasized about that night, dreamt about it, and relived it every moment she could. Her nights were filled with mindless hypotheticals. What if she'd slept with him? What would it have felt like? When would it actually happen? How would she feel? Would he be gentle? Or would he be rough? What would the rest of his body feel like under her fingers?

"It's a good thing you're blind." Billy suddenly whispered into her ear, a laugh trailing the statement. Quinn touched his face in confusion, tracing his big grin and stubbly cheeks.

"Why?" Before she could drop her hand, his teeth caught the tip of her pointer finger, giving the digit a quick pinch. The bite sent lightning up her arm and straight to her stomach. He chuckled, his chest rumbling against her shoulder.

"Because then you'd see how many people were starin' right now." Billy whispered. Quinn swallowed, dropping her hand fast and swiping hair away from her face. A blush filled her cheeks as the embarrassment settled in.

"Oh." She muttered, taking a step out of Billy's chest to put distance between them. The last thing she needed was the entire female population out to slit her throat. Billy didn't let her retreat, however, sliding close again to pin her to his body.

"Whatever." He whispered. "Not the first time I've made out with a girl in front of people." Quinn stiffened.

"Well gee, when you put it that way." The anger appeared out of nowhere, hard and hot from a place hidden deep inside of her. "I should be honored to join those ranks." She added. Billy was silent, his breath frozen in his lungs. Then it came out in a whoosh.

"You're jealous." He stated with a note of disbelief in his voice. Quinn ground her teeth, suddenly ready to leave. Leave it to Billy to ruin a perfect moment of fantasy with naked reality. He was not hers. And he never would be.

"No. I am not." She bit back angrier things and stuck with stark lies. Because, really, she was bristling inside and out. There was something oddly primitive and thoroughly stupid about the feeling and she wasn't sure she could admit it to herself, let alone out loud.

"Oh yeah ya are." Billy chuckled lightly, ducking in closer so she could smell him. His scent was like a drug she was addicted to, drawing her in though she wanted to fight back. "Your eyes get dark when you're mad." He murmured, stroking a finger over her cheek. The observation took her off guard. No one ever said anything about her eyes; it was a subject most people avoided, except Billy of course. Where everyone else would tread lightly, he'd tromp through in combat boots.

Quinn scooted away from him again. Crossing her arms, she knew she wasn't proving him wrong. In fact, her body language alone was making his point.

"Fuck." Billy purred his favorite word, turning so that his arms trapped her against the car. Then he pressed in, holding her there as he dipped his head into the back of her neck. "You're so easy to piss off."

"I'm not—" When she tried to protest, Billy exhaled into the skin behind her ear and her body sputtered to life.

"Ya wanna be my girl?" He moaned into her throat. Quinn's inner vixen flexed, adrenaline flooding her veins. Did she?

Yes.

Hell yes.

But saying that would be too easy. He wasn't hers. Admitting she wanted to be his when she couldn't have him was dangerous; and would only put her at a disadvantage.

"Please. You never have just one girl. And, honestly, I don't care. You can mess around with whomever you want." She faked a brave tone, despite the trembling fingers she had pressed into the hood of his car. "Probably doesn't matter much, as long as they've got the equipment." Billy laughed, dark and heavy into her ear.

"I like you angry." He breathed, a hand appearing beneath her ribs to gradually descend her stomach. "I can do whoever I want?" Quinn held her breath to keep from whimpering aloud.

"Yup." She forced the word from her lips, maintaining her flat, even voice like a pro. Billy stopped caressing her belly and turned her around. Now that they were face to face, she felt her bravery leaving her. That was his signature, forcing her to face him. He knew how to rein her in, make her feel exposed and malleable under his gaze.

"Got anybody in mind?" He murmured.

"Maybe." She breathed. The truth? The truth was she wanted Billy more than anything on the planet. Sex had never been important to Quinn, but he'd changed that. Being near Billy was intoxicating and she was dizzy with the prospect of more. Together, they had the potential to be incredible. She didn't have much experience, actually any experience, but she understood what mind-blowing bliss they could share. Not only that, but she felt like a whole person around Billy. He brought out a part of her she'd never encountered. Beneath layers of timid and quiet was a thirsty vixen with a sharp tongue.

Billy leaned in until their lips were brushing, but not touching, a whisper of contact between two tingling mouths. Then he stepped away.

"Get in the car, smartass."

* * *

><p>Billy wasn't chatty as he drove. It made Quinn squirm, wondering where it was that they were going. She wasn't worried; she trusted Billy.<p>

It was that trust that was causing her to squirm.

"You know, I don't know you very well." She spoke the thought aloud, playing with the hem of her shirt. Billy shrugged, his shirt rubbing against the leather seat.

"What's ta know?"

"I don't know…what do you like to do? Who do you hang out with?" Quinn's face warmed as she started to fluster. Everything she said sounded girlish and needy. But in her head it had sounded normal for her to know. "I mean, I don't even know where you live." She finished with a shrug of her own, resting her head into the space between the window and the headrest.

"You know where I live." Billy snorted. "You were there." Her face heated further.

"Oh, right." Her voice sounded mousy. "Sorry."

"I hang out with Bodie and Baggy, and you've met those two idiots." Quinn grinned a little at his teasing voice.

"Wait, when did I meet Baggy?" She asked, wiggling in her seat.

"He kinda carried ya to my car the other night." Billy murmured, no doubt smirking. Quinn blushed and covered her cheeks with her hands.

"Oh my gosh." She muttered, embarrassed, as Billy chuckled deeply.

"Relax. I think he liked ya." His teasing forced a laugh from her lips and Quinn shook her head.

"I don't even want to know how I acted."

"You acted passed out." Billy turned the car, Quinn's body weight shifting towards the door. She could tell that he drove fast, but he always took the corners gently. She liked to think he was slowing down for her benefit.

"It could have been worse, I guess." She muttered, pressing a palm to the door handle. Billy snorted in response and the car threatened to become silent once again. "You never told me what you like to do." Quinn murmured.

"What do ya think?" He purred, a hand appearing on her knee. She blushed and pushed the touch away with a shake of her head.

"Come on, you're not the floozy everyone gossips about." Billy let out a bark of a laugh, making Quinn jump a little in her seat.

"Floozy?"

"What? It's a word." She muttered as he continued to snicker. Then he chucked her under the chin.

"Ya talk like an old lady, Quinn." He murmured, his hand vanishing. "I know my social rep and I like it." Billy Darley: manwhore and womanizer. Quinn didn't know how she felt about him admitting that he liked the title. In fact, she felt the familiar heat of frustration rising in her stomach.

"Why?" She asked, hugging herself loosely. Billy shrugged again.

"Because it's easy. If people don't expect a lot, you don't have a lot to maintain." His answer went down smoothly and Quinn relaxed. "Some reputations are harder to keep." He added softly. It didn't take much to understand his meaning.

"Your business." She whispered.

"Yeah." He grunted, taking a turn that forced Quinn closer to him. After a moment, his arm rested beside hers on the median, their skin heating at the contact. "I like cars." Billy murmured. "Like to fix 'em. Tear 'em apart and switch out the parts." Quinn smiled.

"Did you fix this one?" She asked, rubbing a hand over her door. He snorted a light laugh.

"As much as I can. This baby needs a lotta work." Quinn thought about the smooth hood of the Mustang and the smell of fresh leather around her. It was obvious that Billy had put a lot of hard work into the car. The fact that it needed more spoke to a deep dedication.

"It sounds great so far." She whispered, listening to the purr of the engine. Billy remained silent and suddenly Quinn didn't mind the quiet.

Part of her was starting to understand that Billy Darley was just quiet. In school, he'd always been the silent figure in the back of the room, causing chaos only when it was expected. A cruel word here, an insult there, and he could drive any teacher crazy. The more Quinn thought about it, the more his behavior started to make sense. Billy didn't say things just to say things. Everything he did had a second motivation. Whether it was to get kicked out of class or make his friends laugh, he wasn't nearly the two-dimensional bully she'd thought he'd been.

She started to imagine what he'd looked like in the back of that classroom: quiet, calculating, and smart. Chewing her lip, she thought up a picture of a brooding face, young and beautiful, but sharply defensive.

Then she thought about him working in a garage. He liked fixing cars, working hard on a steel body that couldn't judge him, ask him questions, or leave. Quinn sighed softly, a content smile on her face.

Maybe she did know Billy.

* * *

><p>"Do ya trust me?" Quinn was mystified by the question, her body breaking out in goosebumps. Billy had stopped the car only a minute earlier, giving her no explanation as to where they were before he'd taken her cane and pulled her from the seat. Holding his hand, she'd inched her way across uneven ground onto a wooden dock. Of course, she hadn't told Billy that she knew it was a dock. She'd kept her mouth closed about what she'd managed to figure out with her senses.<p>

And now he stood behind her, his hands on her waist as he purred into her ear.

"Trust you?" Quinn managed to speak at last, trying her best to hold back the nervous shake in her hands. Although she'd never admitted it out loud, Quinn truly did trust Billy. But the words weren't easy to say, sitting on the tip of her tongue.

"Trust me." Billy caressed her hips with his fingertips. "Ya know, the guy who decked a kid for spikin' your beer?" With a sigh, she gave in. How could she not? Leaning back against his chest, she rested her head on his shoulder and whispered one word.

"Yes."

"Take off your shirt." Even though he'd seductively purred the command in her ear, Quinn started out of his arms in shock.

"What?" Billy chuckled.

"Did I stutter?" Her mouth opened and closed a couple of times before she could gather an intelligent response.

"I can't take off my clothes here!" She didn't mean to shriek, but it came out that way, her voice high pitched from disbelief. Billy was quiet for a moment before she felt a breeze of movement. "What are you doing?"

"Strippin'. Like you should be." He grunted, the sound of a zipper telling her that he was, indeed, doing just as he said. Stripping. Quinn swallowed and wrung her hands.

"Why? What are you—" Suddenly he was very close, breathing against her cheek. His deep voice broke through her chest, vibrating her insides with a thick growl.

"If ya don't take off those pants in the next five seconds, you'll regret it." He sounded hungry, not angry, and Quinn's stomach did somersaults. Her hands shook as she shyly touched her fly. Was she really going to do this? Here?

"Billy…" She tried to speak, but his hands were on her jaw, cradling her head as he pressed feather light kisses into the corners of her mouth. Distracted, Quinn barely noticed when her jeans pooled around her ankles. Her hands were not longer hesitant, grabbing the hem of her shirt to pull it over her head. Only when she stood in only her underwear did self-consciousness pang against her ribs.

"Shoes." Billy demanded, his hands moving down her arms to her hips. Doing as she was told, her socks and shoes were shucked and tossed aside, leaving her barefoot on the docks.

"Should I lay down?" She whimpered, her heart exploding in her ears. This was it, that moment she'd been dreaming about. She was going to lose her virginity to Billy Darley, and it was going to happen on a dock, with water all around them. Her body tingled with excitement.

"Just come 'ere." Billy replied, pulling her flush against him with a tug on her hand. He was warm to the touch, his skin heating hers. Quinn hesitantly raised her hands, letting them trace his face before dropping down his throat. All this time she'd wondered what he was like under his shirt. She'd touched plenty of faces, but her body was the only body she knew. No one else had ever been that close to her, that intimate.

Billy's hands slid down her sides, slipping over and around until his palms cupped her butt through the cotton panties. Quinn swallowed a whimper, her breath picking up speed as he touched her there.

"Still trust me?" Billy growled. Gulping down a mouthful of air, she nodded.

Then suddenly she was off the ground and they were both moving. Falling. Crashing.

Into freezing water.

Quinn screamed and kicked, thrashing around in the water. Even though it was still summer, the ocean would still remain well below seventy, which would keep any normal people from jumping in.

Apparently Billy Darley was not normal.

"OH MY GOD!" She could barely breathe, but she somehow managed to scream as she fought to remain above the water's surface.

"FUCK THAT'S COLD!" Billy let out a string of curses nearby, his splashes growing closer. "Can ya stand?" He asked from beside her, pulling her to him by the elbow.

"No!" She snapped back, shivering wildly.

"I can." He murmured. "Come 'ere." Quinn didn't fight him off when he lifted her onto his hips, her legs wrapping around his waist.

"You're s-s-such-h a j-jer-k." Teeth chattering, she pressed herself into his chest with her hands balled up under her chin. Billy laughed.

"Surprised ya, huh?" He teased. She didn't even bother to respond, nodding against his collarbones. "I thought you'd figure it out."

"I w-was d-d-distracted." She muttered. "I thought…" Then she fell quiet, unwilling to reveal what she'd hoped Billy had planned for them on that dock. But he read her like a book, his hands rubbing down her back until her was holding her butt again, pressing her lower body into his hips. Suddenly the water wasn't so cold. Her jaw had stopped shaking from the chill and her body was adjusting, growing warmer.

"Ya thought I was gonna screw ya on the dock?" Quinn chewed on her lip, trying not to think about the soft bulge she felt against her underwear. Billy tucked his mouth to her ear, his breath warming her cheek.

"I mean, what was I supposed to think?" She replied, circling her arms around his neck. It was strange how comfortable she felt against him like that. He was the only one she could act this way with. He was familiar and comforting. "One second you're asking if I trust you and the next you were demanding I take off my clothes." He laughed.

"Then I threw ya in the fuckin' ocean." Quinn pouted, weaving her fingers into Billy's wet hair. To her surprise, it was short, cut to a few inches. As she played with the choppy ends, Billy didn't say a word, his heart beating against her ribs.

It was perfect. Despite the lack of conversation and soaking wet underwear, Quinn knew she'd never have another adventure like this one. She'd never be so happy in someone else's arms.

Leaning forward, she pressed a tiny kiss to his cheek, the water sloshing gently around them. Then she turned away, dropping her head to his shoulder.

"I think I'm in love with you." She whispered, listening to the coast beat lazily against the dock nearby.

Billy went very still.

"Don't." He grunted. Quinn closed her eyes and wished he'd said something else. Anything else. "Quinn, I'm serious."

"It's not a light switch. I can't just turn it off." She muttered.

"Yes you can. Ya have to." He tried to muscle her head off his shoulder, but Quinn fought to hide from him. If he saw the pain on her face, she'd be humiliated. "Quinn, look at me."

As soon as the words were out of his mouth, his hands went still and fell away. Billy Darley may never apologize, or regret, but Quinn knew he wanted to. She had no trouble escaping him then, dropping from his waist into the icy water.

"I can't, Billy." She hissed, furious with the hot tears biting into the corners of her eyes. Stubbornly refusing to touch him, she began to paddle towards the sound of water lapping against the dock. With any luck she would be able to pull herself out without help.

"Quinn." It took him a minute to call after her, his body splashing through the water as he followed. "Quinn, stop." She didn't want to stop; she didn't want to talk. She wanted to sob hysterically at her own stupidity. Why had she confessed her feelings for him? And to his face? Her throat caught as she replayed his response in her head. _"Don't." _

"Goddamn it, stop!" He was right behind her when she grasped the side of the wooden dock in front of her.

Maybe if she hadn't tried to pull herself up, the sob wouldn't have escaped her lips. But it did, bursting from her lungs in a sad wheeze. He was on her in a flash, warm skin pressed into her shoulder blades and spine. "Quinn."

"Let go of me." She wasn't sure if he heard her over the water, but he didn't release her. His arms wrapping her in soft strength, he pressed his cheek to her own.

"Just stop. Christ." The burn of salty tears trickled down her face, but she didn't cry. She refused to make another pitiful sound. "Fuck. I hate this shit with feelings."

"Feelings?" Quinn muttered. "Can you even feel above the waist?" He groaned into her neck and she stiffened, wrenching her head in the opposite direction.

"Not right now, no. It's fuckin' freezin' in here."

"Take me home." She snapped. "I'm cold."

"So am I." He growled back, easing them away from the dock. Arms still locked around her ribs, Billy's bare skin was pressed to hers. She could feel the smooth flesh on her back, the tickle of hair from his chest. "But we're not leavin' 'til ya understand me."

"I understand you just fine." Quinn muttered, keeping her face turned away. "You had a hard childhood, so you don't trust anyone. Not even your friends. So you keep everyone at arm's length. You don't want care about anyone."

"Damn right, I don't wanna care." He snarled. "Caring gets you killed, makes you sloppy. Wanna know what would happen if I told any old whore that I loved her? She'd be dead."

"Right, because this is the Wild West and that happens all the time." Quinn hissed, sarcasm flowing from her as easily as tears. But Billy wasn't amused. He whipped her around in his arms in a hard tug, water splashing as they came face to face.

"No, Quinn, because my dad is a goddamn gunrunner. A gunrunner with enemies. And one day, they'll be my enemies. And those assholes wouldn't mind killin' a blind girl to ruin my day. In fact, they'd love it if I had a sweet little wife at home, raisin' kids. Because nothin' changes a man like comin' home to find his son, curled up in his dead mother's lap, cryin' for her ta wake up." Billy's furious voice fell from the air, leaving nothing but shocking silence as Quinn forgot how to breathe.

So much. In a matter of seconds, Billy had told her so much about himself she wasn't able to comprehend it all. A "hard childhood" was a cruel description of his real history. Quinn's chest burned with sympathy and her tears flowed for the little boy, calling his mother's name. Billy had told her that he couldn't love. And for the first time she understood why. It wasn't some ploy to fend off commitment and remain the bachelor.

He couldn't go through the pain of losing someone he loved again.

"Billy." She whispered, stroking his cheek with a hand. "I'm sorry." He leaned against her palm, asking for more of the comfort without having to speak a syllable. "I didn't know…"

"No shit. No one does." Billy muttered. "Bones kept it quiet. Said she ran off so the cops wouldn't come sniffin' around."

"I'm so sorry." Quinn cooed but he pulled from her touch, sighing angrily over her shoulder.

"Just…" His big hands cupped her face, thumbs stroking away what remained of her tears. "…don't say what ya said anymore. Because you can't." Quinn nodded, even though it made her chest hurt. It didn't matter if she said it or not, she loved Billy; possibly more, now that she knew about his past.

"Okay." With a satisfied sigh, he touched his forehead to hers.

"Goddamn it, Squint." Billy pressed a large palm to the base of her spine. A grin tugged at the corners of her mouth as their bodies met in the most intimate of places.

"I'll let that one slide." He hummed his approval into her neck, his hips starting to move subtly under the water.

For a while they stayed that way, intertwined in the water as the afternoon moved on around them. Quinn lost herself in the quiet, thinking about the little boy Billy had once been. How old had he been when he'd lost his mother? How many years had it taken for his childish innocence to vanish?

Billy broke her train of thought when his mouth started to explore the nape of her neck, shooting shivers down her back and arms. She tilted her head to open up for him and he chuckled, sucking gently at the skin.

"Ya know, I've been naked in here the whole time, and ya haven't touched me." Billy purred, trailing kisses from her ear to her shoulder. Quinn's face started to heat up.

"I'm pretty sure I'm touching you now." She laughed, her hands threading through his hair as he continued to worship her throat.

"I mean, I want ya to look." Quinn's smile slipped from her face, her heart skidding to a stop in her chest. Billy kissed her shocked lips, a snicker whispering through his nose. "I wasn't kiddin' when I said I wanted you ta look at me."

"Where?" It was a dumb question, but it popped out of her mouth in a moment cluttered with confusion. She knew exactly where she wanted to feel. She wanted to feel every inch of his long, toned chest and the hard muscles in his back. Quinn wanted to know all of him.

"Anywhere ya want, baby." Billy growled, nibbling along her jaw as he lifted her higher on his waist. Swallowing her nerves, Quinn nodded.

First were his shoulders. As she'd suspected, they were hard and muscular, reminding her how strong Billy really was. The wet skin led her lower to his chest; there it was softer, his body lean but relaxed under her touch. When her fingers tangled in the dusting of hair between his pecks, Billy let out a hard breath, his throat humming with a repressed groan. Quinn wanted to know what he sounded like when he let loose. Would he snarl like a beast or groan in delirium?

She ventured lower to his abdomen, feeling each hill and valley of his physique, the hard flesh flexing and relaxing with each breath he took. The water made him slick and Quinn imagined running her lips his stomach, tasting the liquid as it dripped off his sculpted figure.

From there, she swept her hands to his hips, the narrow bones lined with muscle, leading her towards his spine. Billy moaned into her ear as she touched his back, her hands sloping down until they met the smooth, solid cheeks of his butt. Mimicking Billy's example, Quinn put one in each hand, amazed at how they flexed beneath her touch.

"Ya like my ass?" He purred, flexing it again as she replied with a squeeze.

"Maybe a little." She teased. In a smooth movement, Billy pulled her legs around his waist, holding her head in one hand to bring their mouths together.

"I want you." He growled. Quinn panted, her pulse shooting through the roof at his throaty confession. "Right here. Right now." His body molded perfectly against hers and her heart had no reason to refuse. Even if he vanished tomorrow, Billy Darley was hers for the moment. And she wanted him. All of him.

"Okay." She whispered, squeezing his hips closer with a flex of her legs. He moaned into her neck and held her butt in his hands, lighting her up like kindling. After a moment of lustful grinding, he grunted, lifting his head.

"It's too cold." He muttered with frustration. Quinn gave a whine of disappointment and Billy pulled back, planting a searing kiss on her lips. With his mouth, he showed her how badly he wanted her. He nibbled her bottom lip with his teeth before he slid his tongue beside hers, their moans mingling in the quiet. Each kiss held a promise of more, revealing how he planned to take her, fill her, and bring her to the edge of exquisite madness. When they parted for air, Billy smoothed her hair from her face and panted.

"If I wasn't freezin' my nuts off, I'd be inside ya right now." He growled. Quinn sighed, a goofy grin on her face.

"You have such a way with words."

When Billy laughed, it was loud and real, warming Quinn from her head to her toes in the chilly ocean water.

* * *

><p><strong>Erm, so I'm a terrible for making you wait so long. I apologize PROFUSELY for it. But I've been severely uninspired as of late, and I'm too picky to just slap up any old chapter for you guys to read. So, hopefully, all that waiting has paid off and I hope you enjoyed! Love to all my readers! You're absolutely amazing and I would BEAR HUG you all if I could. Hit me up on tumblr [ .com] yo! I love hearing from you all. :)<strong>

**Shout outs: CupKatyCakes, honey-and-lace, Australia, , Marnie21, xoShortee93, Rasha1210, redhedlund, and MGC. LOVE YOU GUYS! :D  
><strong>

**And of course, I need to thank Lisa, my wonderful muse. She sticks with me even when I make NO sense and can't seem to finish a single thing. Love ya girl. :)  
><strong>


	8. Chapter 8

Not seeing Billy at school the next day was a huge let down. Quinn's heart had soared when she'd shown up, only to realize that Billy wasn't in math class…or the building at all. It made her less than enthusiastic about talking to anyone, putting on a show for her fake friends. Her smile wasn't real. Her laugh was hollow. She just went through the motions until she got home. It was easier to forget her disappointment around her parents. They seemed to exist on a separate plane, one that didn't include sex, danger, or Billy Darley. It was easier to distract herself there.

The second day he didn't show, she tried to not let it bother her. After all, she wasn't depending on him to go about her day. Life had existed before Billy Darley; it was going to continue on without him. But Quinn hated the idea that she needed him when it was so easy for him to go without seeing her.

The third day she tried to keep herself from listening for his footsteps or his voice.

The fourth day she knew he wasn't coming. She went home for the weekend with a heavy heart and a precarious grip on her emotions. There, she threw herself into homework until all she could think about was how much she hated economics. And when her eyelids grew heavy, and her yawns happened one after the other, she went to bed.

Monday arrived at a crawl. Quinn felt like everything happened in slow motion. The clocks were ticking slower, the bells rang late, and no one would move at her speed. But it didn't matter anyway.

He wasn't there.

Billy was known to skip school. It wasn't a new trick, but this was the first time Quinn felt like a part of her was missing when she didn't see him.

Another week slunk by like a glacier, taking Quinn's sanity with it. She thought about him more often than ever, making her angry with herself and angrier with Billy. How could a simple crush become such a consuming problem?

But the better question was this: where the hell was he? She knew he was at least interested in her. Billy liked her company, or he wouldn't have done all the things he did. He wouldn't have taken her to the docks, or defended her when she'd been helpless. Billy Darley had inadvertently shown her how much he liked her, and she knew it wasn't all in her head.

Yet he'd let eleven days pass without seeing her. Or even showing up to school. Quinn craved his voice or his smell worse than a thirsty person craves water. So by the beginning of that third week, when Monday sluggishly pulled into the station, she lost her mind.

Completely.

* * *

><p>Class was in progress when her sanity snapped. Quinn's brain went from white to black, like a switch had been thrown. Light to dark. Good to bad. In a moment.<p>

Shooting her hand in the air, she interrupted her English teacher in the middle of a sentence and the woman cut off like Quinn had slapped her.

"Uh, yes? You have a question, Quinn?"

Calmly, she lowered her hand and placed it neatly in her lap.

"I'm not feeling well, can I see the nurse?" The teacher's response was immediate and friendly, excusing her while she fell effortlessly back into lecture. Quinn wasn't listening when she gathered her things. She was too focused on what she was planning, her heart racing in her ribs as she took her backpack and cane, making her way to the hall. From there it was a straight shot to the main office, but that's not where she went. Quinn went the other direction, weaving through back halls until she popped out the backdoor.

Part of her was disappointed that no one was outside smoking. She wanted someone to witness her leaving the school without permission. Quinn felt like rebelling didn't count if no one knew you did anything. No doubt her absence would eventually be noticed, and her parents would receive a phone call, but she didn't care. Honestly, for the first time in her life, Quinn was done with obeying the rules and following the flow of things.

And that was how she ended up outside a motel at two o'clock in the afternoon, stepping out of a cab.

While the rest of her classmates were doing endless laps around a gym, she was counting doors with her hands. There were only twenty rooms at the Lucky Clover Motel, so it wasn't hard to find number thirteen. Of all the room numbers, he'd chosen that one. And that made it easy to remember.

Her fingers checked and double-checked the numbers nailed to the door, tracing the contours of the brass over and over. When she'd convinced herself she had the right door, she swallowed and raised a hand.

The first knock was barely audible, her hand shaking so badly her palm twitched when she made a fist. No one answered the sad attempt at a knock, so Quinn took a breath to rally her courage. She really was a huge wimp. It was only a door. Billy's door, no less. Two things she wasn't afraid of.

Then why the hell was she so worried about knocking?

The second knock was better, and heavy footsteps immediately responded from the other side. Her heart took off and she felt her face bloom with heat. He was coming to the door and she didn't know if she'd be able to keep from leaping into his arms. She had missed him so much. Much more than she could ever tell him.

Billy opened the door with a hard pull, air rushing past Quinn's face.

"Quinn?" He sounded confused and she played with her hands for a moment, wishing like hell that she'd brought something other than her cane to distract her fingers.

"Hi—" She barely murmured a syllable before he'd grabbed her by the arms and pulled her inside. And not in a romantic sense. Billy hauled her inside the motel like she was a rag doll, the door promptly slamming so hard it snapped in her ears.

"The hell are ya doin'?!" He barked, his hands still gripping her roughly by upper arms. She dropped her mouth open for a moment before an answer came to mind.

"I wanted to see you." She whispered, reaching up to find his face. Quinn needed to understand what he was feeling, but Billy moved so her hand found nothing.

"You shouldna come here!" He was angry now. No more surprised grumbling; Billy was flat out mad. Quinn shrank back from him and her shoulder blades met wall in a thump, her arms falling limp as he released them.

"Billy, you're scaring me." Her throat hurt when she tried to speak because tears threatened to warp her tone into a sob. This wasn't the reunion she'd fantasized about during the past two weeks.

"Good!" He grunted. "Now go home." His hands were shoving her again, this time back towards the door.

"Billy, wait—" She pressed a hand to the wall to stop herself, her eyes burning in the corners with unshed tears. "What's wrong?"

But as soon as she asked the question, she felt the shift in the room. Something was happening, but it was something she couldn't see. Billy grabbed her upper arm, but Quinn promptly jolted away. "What's going on?" She asked the question differently, her shocked fear slowly molding into confused anger. It wasn't hard to figure out when her sight was leaving her out of something obvious.

"I said, go home." Billy snapped, manhandling her once again. But this time she didn't flinch away from him; instead, she shoved against his chest.

Her hands met naked, warm flesh. His skin was bare.

Her senses were on fire in moments, taking in all the details. He was dry, the room was warm but not humid. He hadn't been in the shower. Quinn inhaled. There was a sweet scent in the air, something she didn't recognize.

"Stop pushing me!" She shot back, taking two bold steps further into the room. Her nose was busy picking up smells. Pizza, beer, cigarettes, Billy, and…that. That mystery thing.

"Quinn, ya need ta go." He growled, taking her elbow in one hand. "Ya shouldna come to this place." _This place._ He'd brought her there before, what was so wrong with her being there a second time? She shoved at his hand, but only succeeded in making him grip harder.

"Sto—"

A toilet flush. Quiet, muted through a door, but loud enough to reach her sensitive ears. Quinn's voice died in her throat as she listened, her chest tightening. Billy heard it too, and his pulling paused.

"Who is that?" Quinn asked. Billy said nothing. He didn't even try to tug her away. He simply turned to stone. Frustrated, she threw up a hand and pressed it to his neck. His pulse was shooting through his veins, screaming against her palm. She felt his anxiety and it shocked her, but only a moment passed before Billy yanked her hand away.

"Get out, Quinn." He muttered, dragging her to the door. His words were too flat for her to respond. Billy wasn't just angry; he was cold. If she didn't know any better, she would have sworn he was a stranger to her, indifferent and uncaring. Her heart hurt inside her chest.

"Billy, we gonna do this?" A woman's voice burst through the bathroom door, the creaky hinge telling Quinn someone had emerged, visible in the small room. "Who is she?" The mystery woman added in a rough snort. Quinn's skin prickled from head to toe.

Now it made sense. This was Billy's place. This is where he brought every other conquest. And this woman was just one of the many. He didn't feel the same way she did. He was free to continue sleeping around as he pleased. There was never a commitment between them, there wasn't even a relationship. To Billy, she was just another piece to string along. He didn't belong to her, and he never would.

Billy didn't have to pull her towards the door anymore. Quinn was going to it. Fumbling with the doorknob, she managed to free herself from the stuffy room, the rest of the world falling away as her pulse rocketed in her ears. She needed air; she needed to breathe.

"Not mine." She whispered to herself, her chest tight and churning. This is how it felt to have your heart break, she realized. Her cane was as useless as her eyes while Quinn groped her way down the front of the motel strip. She couldn't focus on anything except the echo of the woman's voice. _Who is she? We gonna do this?_ _We gonna do this? We gonna do this? _

"Not mine not mine." Her lips mumbled what her heart was shrieking. What had she been thinking? She hadn't been thinking. She'd needed Billy and he was with someone else. Sleeping with someone else. Naked with someone else.

"Quinn!"

She ran faster when she heard him calling. Running felt better. It felt like she could leave the ugly truth behind her if she ran fast enough. Maybe rewind what she'd done. Go back to just missing him. Her feet picked up speed and she actually wished she was back in the school gym, lost in just another day dream. She would rather be delusional than have her wishes ripped from her so violently. Her mind swimming, she let her breath turn to muffled sobs.

The sound of his boots made her heart sink to her stomach. He was chasing her. She ran faster.

Big mistake.

The sidewalk ended and the curb dropped abruptly, giving her no choice but to fall. And fall she did. Hard. Hands out, knees first, she hit the asphalt and rolled, once, twice, several times. Her cane bounced and clattered somewhere nearby, cursing her with its tiny plastic pings. She didn't care. Quinn let out the real pain, tears rolling down her face. But it wasn't the scrapes on her hands, or the burns on her knees that hurt. It was everything else.

She was pushing off the ground with those scraped hands when Billy's boots scuffed across the pavement in a rush, landing at her side.

"Fuck Quinn!" He cursed angrily, his hands tugging on her arms to help her. She wanted nothing from him. She was too hurt. The anger built and burst in a heartbeat.

"Get away from me!" She screamed, lashing out with both arms. One hand connected with his chest while the other whacked him in the neck, making him grunt and drop her. He cursed and she hissed with fury, tasting her own tears in her mouth as she brought herself to her feet. "I hate you."

"Good." He snapped back, his own anger obviously rising to match her own. Hitting him probably hadn't helped. She wiped her mouth with the back of one of her injured hands, shuffling away from him.

"Yes, congratulations." She half hissed, half sobbed at him, her saliva thick and salty as she swallowed. "You got what you wanted, I hate you." Quinn knew she was lying, but it felt good to lie. She wanted him to hurt, even though there was nothing she could say that would cut deep enough.

"Best news I've gotten all day." Billy seethed back at her. Her chest burned and for a moment Quinn thought she was going to vomit. She was so hurt, so angry, her body didn't know how to process it all.

"Goddamn you." She hissed, continuing to back away until her body hit a car. There, she slumped to the ground and her anger vanished. In a crumpled heap, she surrendered to the painful heartbreak. Curling her legs up into her chest, she cried into her knees. "I really want to hate you."

He said nothing. Did nothing. She wasn't even sure he was there, yet somehow she just knew he was. Quinn could feel him watching, his presence all but tangible.

"But I can't." She whispered into her jeans. Billy sighed and she jumped, trembling from her tears.

"I'm not the guy ya think I am, Quinn." He stated solidly. She brought her head up off her knees and frowned at him.

"Yes you are." She muttered. "Don't try to tell me otherwise. I know who you are, Billy Darley." It was surprising how clear her voice was during her small proclamation. He moved closer and snorted angrily from his nose.

"No ya don't. Lots changed since we saw each other last." Now it was her turn to snort with attitude.

"Oh that's such crap." She snapped. "You're a drug-dealing slut, Billy. That's not news." It was a cheap shot, and it felt right to insult him, but it didn't provide any relief towards the betrayal she felt. His retort? Billy moved quickly and trapped her, his body so close that she knew he'd fallen into a crouch in front of her.

"Can ya love a drug dealer, a slut and a killer, Quinn?" He snarled. Her breath left in a whirl of disbelief and Billy snorted. "Get it now, baby? Does it all make sense?"

"What ha—"

"Remember that day ya found me beat ta shit?" Billy cut her off with a rough voice and her stomach bubbled with fear. He was different. There was an edge that hadn't been there before. The way he'd spoken to her in the motel room had been her first clue. Now she felt the same sharpness again. "I killed the motherfucker who did it."

A long silence fell between them, Quinn breathing quietly as she processed Billy's angry words. It took a while before she could think of something to say.

"You killed him?"

"Cut his throat open." Billy was intentionally cruel, making her flinch. But Quinn nodded quietly, trying her best to keep it together. In her head? Yeah, she was freaking out. Murder was a big deal. The thought of Billy ending someone's life made her stomach flop.

"He was your first?"

"And he won't be the last." Billy responded harshly and more silence followed. He was trying to scare her with all of this, and Quinn knew it. But for some reason, it wasn't working. Despite the horrifying things coming out of his mouth, and the queasy reaction in her gut, Quinn wasn't afraid of Billy. Not really. He might intimidate her, or make her nervous, but she couldn't fear him.

"I don't care." She whispered softly, wiping tears off her cheeks. A new resolve was rising in her stomach. "I still love you."

Billy growled and shot away, his boots kicking across the asphalt.

"What the fuck is wrong with you!" He snapped. His jeans were rasping back and forth in a pace, placing him on her left then her right, left and right.

"Is it really so horrible?" She muttered. "Is that why you sleep with people you don't like, because you can't deal being with someone who actually cares about you?" Billy stopped pacing.

"If ya want sex, Quinn, I can fuck you."

A slap to the face would have hurt less. Pushing off the ground, Quinn stood up.

"That's not what I was talking about and you know it." Her heart might have been breaking, but she wasn't going to take his abuse. She took a step forward, pushing her feet across the asphalt in search of the cane she knew was somewhere nearby.

"I can't be that guy." Billy's soft reply froze her in place, her heart leaping from her stomach to her throat.

"Which guy is that?" She snapped.

"The one who gets you." He muttered back. With a sigh, Quinn let a few more tears fall, her hands shaking as she wiped them over her cheeks.

"You just don't get it, do you?" Her voice was jittery from crying and it didn't help that another round of sobs were trying to break free. "You have me." When Billy didn't reply, she shuddered out a quiet breath and more tears dripped down her cheeks. "Why else would I show up here?" She wanted to crumble up and vanish. Here she was, exposing her sad weakness for him when he would never be emotionally available to her. To anyone. "I needed to see you because…"

He was so still, she could have been talking to a wall.

"…I missed you." She whimpered her final words and covered her face with her hands. _I love you. I love you more than you'll ever love me. And it's going to destroy me._

His arms surprised her, and she let out a sob when they wrapped her in tight to his chest. She cried into him, breathing in his scent, enveloped in his warm skin. Quinn cried and trembled in his arms. Eventually the tears slowed and she was taking deeper breaths, her face resting on his peck.

"I was gettin' a tattoo done." Billy murmured into her hair. Quinn sniffed and exhaled against his skin, her hands tucked under her chin.

"What?"

"Well, not anymore." He grumbled. "The chick's probably gone by now. I'll have ta reschedule." She pulled back, Billy's arms still wrapped around her shoulders.

"Wait, what?"

He sighed and Quinn felt a wave of comprehension. Tattoo. His bare chest. _We gonna do this?_

"She wasn't…" Quinn started crying for a third time, this time with relief, and Billy grabbed her face in both hands.

"Doesn't matter." He stated abruptly. "We're not a thing, Quinn." Her chest hurt, but she nodded anyway. He was right. They weren't a thing, just like she'd told herself a hundred times. "Ya can't come here anymore. And I'm not gonna be at school." Quinn sniffed and silently nodded. "I'm not a kid anymore. My life's the real deal now."

"I understand." She whispered. But Billy kept a hold on her cheeks.

"No, ya don't." With a sigh, he rested his forehead to hers. "Tomorrow I meet Bones' suppliers." A cold fear rushed through Quinn's limbs and she reached up to hold onto Billy's wrists.

"You weren't going to see me again, were you?" She dreaded the answer to her question, because she knew the answer. Their swim together was supposed to be the last time. He'd chosen to leave her that way, happy and unaware of the ugliness ahead. Billy remained silent and she reached for his face, which he let her read. His eyes were closed, and his forehead was set flat, his mouth in a solid line. "Yes." She decided to answer for him.

"Quinn—"

"I'm not afraid of what happens. I just want to spend time with you. I'm not afraid." She whispered. He laughed gently, his breath sighing from his nose.

"Doesn't matter." Quinn held onto his neck, frustration pulling her forehead down into a frown.

"Don't I get a say?"

"No." He was gentle, but firm, taking her hands away. "Ya don't belong here, Quinn." She felt a prickle of rejection as he continued. "People 'round here remember faces. They hold grudges. Comin' here was bad. Bein' around me is bad."

"I don't care." She insisted.

"I—" Billy cut himself off, but Quinn shivered all the same. _I do. _The words went unsaid, but more tears flowed from them anyway.

"This can't be it." She whispered. He sighed again and their foreheads met.

"But it's gotta be." Her heart breaking all over again, Quinn reached for his hands, taking them from her face. "You and I don't know each other."

"Yes we do." Billy sighed through his nose and his head tilted, bringing their faces cheek to cheek.

"Quinn—"

"I love you." She kissed his cheek and Billy let out a hard breath. That only made her heart hurt more. There was no victory in hearing his struggle; it only made her own worse.

"You can't." He wasn't telling her, he was begging her. For the first time ever, Billy sounded weak. And Quinn trembled with pain.

"Please. Just once." She was on her toes, arms circling his neck. "Let me in, Billy." His sigh cracked in the back of his throat, hissing through his teeth into her neck. It was such a sad sound, coming from him. And it wrecked her, broke her. "I need you."

Billy didn't answer with words. Instead, he broke his own rules and ripped her head back to crush her lips against his.

* * *

><p>He carried her inside the way a new husband carries his bride. One arm under her knees, the other around her back, taking her all the way back to room thirteen. Quinn spent that time wrapped around his neck. She was memorizing everything about him. The way he walked, the way his arms flexed under weight. She burned the feel of his strength and his broad shoulders into her mind. She memorized his smell. Smoky and clean with just a hint of a musty cologne. He smelled like a man, tantalizing and intoxicating. She wanted to rub her face in his chest, surround herself in the scent. It made her hungry, made her weak.<p>

The motel room was empty when he opened it, and Quinn felt like the day's confrontation had happened years ago. This was a new day in her mind. Her last day with Billy. Pain panged in her chest and she pushed the thought away. If she let her sadness interfere, she would lose her last precious moments of bliss, of true happiness. She wanted to remember the good and not let it be overshadowed by the inevitable end.

"Did you skip school?" Billy suddenly murmured, settling her down on the bed. Quinn smiled a little and nodded, wiping away the remnants of her tears.

"Walked out the back during English." She replied. Billy made a pleased sound in the back of his throat, somewhere between a laugh and a groan.

"Look at you, breakin' rules." Quinn smiled a little wider, her inner vixen stirring. She was going to miss how he made her feel naughty, made her feel out of control. When his weight sunk into the bed beside her, she reached for him and found his forearm, her fingers running over the hair.

"I missed you."

Billy took her jaw in one hand and kissed her. It was not the kind of kiss that implied lust or need, but the savoring kind. He tasted slowly, flicking his tongue over her lips just enough to tease, not to enter. His breath whispered over her mouth as they parted and met with timid touches. This was the passion her stupid romance novels yammered about. It made her stomach soar and her body burn. And when he finally slid his tongue beside hers, she moaned and leaned back.

Billy went with her, his big body rising up to hover over hers. Their kisses deepened, their legs tangled, and Quinn held onto his bare shoulders, pulling him closer until he let all of his weight down on her chest. And that's how they stayed, mouths meeting while Billy lay on top of her, his hips nestled against her right thigh.

Lust kindled slowly, a blush rising in Quinn's face until her cheeks felt like they were on fire while the rest of her body followed suit. The warm tingle between her legs was rippling up and down the back of her thighs, urging her legs apart on the bedspread. Billy took the invitation, lifting his body to settle into the cradle of her hips, his waist splitting her thighs. But he didn't rush. She was the one who wanted more, pulling her hips off the bed. Her arch was met with a delicious groan from Billy's lips and he moved higher on her, his long body blanketing hers.

"Can I see you?" He whispered against her cheek, his hands dragging up and down her legs. Quinn nodded and her blush rushed down her neck. His fingers were patient as he unzipped her jeans, revealing her warm flesh to the cool air in the room. She gave a small gasp and Billy kissed her, moving his weight away to pull down her pants.

"Ya skinned your knees." He murmured, his hands settling on her shins below the knee. "Do they hurt?" Quinn reached for him, cupping his face in one hand. She could have been bleeding and still feel no pain.

"No." Rubbing her thumb over his stubbly cheek, she brought him back to her, tasting his mouth again. Feeling his jeans between her bare legs, she draped her feet over the backs of his thighs, wrapping him in a loose hold. He fit perfectly; their bodies matching like two pieces of a puzzle.

She didn't realize how good the fit was until Billy moved. It was subtle, and gentle, but he flexed his hips and rubbed against her, sending a sharp bolt of pleasure through her body. Quinn let out a strangled moan and Billy dropped his head to her neck, grunting as he repeated the motion. Her mind was swimming in seconds. Without even taking off her panties, Billy Darley had her breathing hard, moving beneath him in promiscuous ways.

"Billy." She whimpered with shuddering breath, lost in layers of sensation she couldn't understand. His big hands swept her hair from her forehead and his lips brushed her neck.

"Shirt." He grunted. Quinn followed the instruction happily, whipping the t-shirt over her head like she had on the docks weeks ago. Billy let out a low rumble and she held onto his back, relishing in the movement of his hips against hers. "Don't hold ya breath." He whispered into her ear. "I like how you sound."

She hadn't even realized she was holding her breath until she let it out in a whoosh, her throat whining out a strangled whimper. With another breath came another whine, and soon Billy was groaning with her, setting a pace that pulsed all over her body.

After a minute of grinding, Billy dropped his head and her bra was pushed off her breasts. By then, Quinn wasn't shy at all, and she arched into him when he teased the skin with his fingertips. Then, with a hungry groan, his mouth captured one of her nipples and Quinn let out a cry.

He shattered her, lighting her up like a firework. She felt everything and nothing in the same second. Billy's skin under her hands, his jeans on her thighs, the hard ridge of him on her panties. She heard his breath shooting from his nose, his lips on her breast, the bed groaning beneath them. She tasted him on her tongue, smelled his roaring scent in her nose. She was alive in a way she'd never had been before and it was better than any sensation she'd ever experienced.

When she drifted down from her high, she realized Billy had stilled. He was stroking her face, poised perfectly still between her legs.

"You're staring." Quinn whispered, panting from exertion. Billy chuckled through his nose and his lips danced across her bare chest, leaving goosebumps on her flesh.

"Couldn't look away." He murmured into her ribs. "I came a little just watching you." Quinn let out a gasp and Billy laughed against her stomach, vibrating her skin with his deep, throaty voice.

"Really?" She couldn't believe she had that power over him, but he didn't say it like a joke. Billy rose up so they were nose to nose and kissed her slowly, rolling his hips in small circles.

"Yup." His warm hands pressed into her back, bringing her off the bed. Using one, he crawled them further up the mattress until Quinn felt a pillow under her head. Then he laid her down and left her, his warmth moving away. A drawer opened, a package crinkled, and Billy's zipper unthreaded. It wasn't until she heard the rip of a wrapper that she understood.

"Wait." Quinn sat up and the noise was silenced. Billy's bare back was to her as he sat next on the edge of the bed, her hand finding his smooth shoulders. "Can I…"

He turned to her slowly and she blushed. As comfortable as she was with him, she was still so shy. She'd let him see her naked, she'd let him touch her in places that no one else had ever explored, and yet she couldn't ask for the same intimacy in return.

But then she didn't have to. Reading her mind, Billy touched her face then gave a soft laugh.

"Come 'ere." She slid into his arms and he took one of her hands with his. Then he lowered them.

Quinn exhaled hard as her fingers landed on the soft skin of his erection. While it didn't feel much different from normal skin, it was the knowledge of where she was caressing him that made her heart leap. The most private yet erotic part of a man, and she was palming Billy's, slowly encircling it with her hand.

As soon as she gripped him, Billy groaned and his arousal jerked, eager to fit into her palm. He was velvety soft but solid beneath the surface, burning to the touch. She slid her hand down his shaft and his head leant into hers, his breath rushing from his lungs. But she didn't stop there. Her hand went further, down the surprising length of him to a hotter, softer place. Her knowledge of anatomy told her what she was holding in her hand, but the anatomical name did nothing to explain how incredible it was. Billy's sex was hard and long and the twin weights below were soft. He was so different from her. But he was also breathtaking. She repeated her stroking a few times, her own body mirroring the pleasurable moans that Billy held in the back of his throat.

When he took her hand away, she was momentarily disappointed.

"I gotta put this on, baby." He muttered, his voice strained in a way that made her stomach coil with heat. She listened as he unwrapped a condom and rolled it on, her belly swirling with anticipation.

"Thank you." She whispered, touching his face with a light brush of her fingers. Billy sighed and took her jaw in a hand.

"No." He murmured, lightly kissing her lips. "Don't thank me." A sharp wave passed through her chest as reality struck again. This was the only time she'd have him. And then she'd never see him again. He would be nothing to her. They would be strangers. Shaking her head, Quinn took his face in her hands and kissed him, stealing his breath in a desperate moment of denial.

It took him only a second to have her back on the pillows, resting like she had been. Sitting back on his knees, he knelt between her legs, smoothing his hands over her thighs. Up and down he stroked, teasing until each exhale weighed like a whimper.

"Billy." She felt like an impatient child, writhing on the sheets. He laughed softly and ducked his head, brushing his lips on her belly. Quinn's hand shot to him, weaving through his hair while she whimpered again. And just when she thought she was going to scream with need, his fingers hooked under the edge of her panties and he peeled them away, down her legs and off her feet.

The sound that came out of his mouth was animal and throaty, sending Quinn arching from the bed. In an instant, his weight was on top of her and their mouths were fused, her hands clawing at his back while her legs wrapped around his waist again.

It wasn't long before Billy's hand slid between them, gliding down her stomach to brush against the place that ached for him. His fingers made her jump against him, shivering and whining. Then she felt the blunt head of him at the entrance of her body and they both froze, pausing at the last second.

"This'll hurt." He whispered into her mouth, his voice hinting at strain he was under. Quinn squeezed her legs on his waist, pushing them together.

"I don't care."

His thrust was swift but well placed, their hips meeting in a moment of bliss and fire. Quinn whimpered as he filled her up, stretched her so far. She couldn't help it, a rush of tears filled her eyes and Quinn touched his face for comfort. His mouth was parted and breath hurried in and out. He was beautiful and she loved him. She was making love with the man she loved. It both pained and amazed her. She shuddered and he held still, instinctively knowing to wait. Billy was a part of her; inside of her body so tight she could feel his pulse. But he didn't make a move until she thrusted up on him.

"Fuck." He bellowed hard into her neck, his hips shooting forward out of impulse. She couldn't help but smile at his favorite word.

That smile didn't last long.

Billy moved fluidly, stroking her from the inside with incredible, long thrusts. Quinn's mouth hung open as sensation robbed her of sound. She couldn't gather enough air to breathe, let alone enough to make any intelligent noises. Before she could gather her wits, a second orgasm crashed into her like a train.

Her toes curled, her nails clawed, and her throat burned. It took a minute for her to understand that the voice ringing in her ears was her own, but it didn't stop her. She was too far-gone to care. He was so big, so powerful, and so good.

Billy buried his head in her neck and she heard him swearing, his body moving faster as she gripped him from deep inside. Grabbing his butt, she focused on him thrusting into her, his body twitching under her palms. She felt the muscles bunching and loosening in his back, the sheen of sweat on his shoulders. He was magnificent. Perfect. Quinn kissed his jaw and throat, making him moan and fumble at the sheets beside her head. No doubt he was gripping them in his fists.

Then, with shuddering groan and a hard sigh, Billy slowed to a stop, letting his weight ease on top of her, head resting on her chest. Quinn smiled as he panted into her ribs and she stroked his short hair, committing that moment to memory. Her first kiss. Her first love. Her first lover.

"I knew it'd be like that." Billy's voice was soft and content when he finally spoke. Quinn smiled and continued petting.

"Like what?" He lifted his head and propped his chin on her sternum. Arms looping under her waist, Billy hugged her against his chest as she felt her way across his face.

"Fuckin' amazing."

Quinn laughed and felt a genuine smile on Billy's cheeks. His skin was warm and his breathing was even, and that smile was unguarded. The real Billy had only been shown to her in glimpses and moments, fleeting glances of who he kept hidden inside his tough outer shell. But as she lay beneath him, Quinn knew she was the only girl to have been with the real Billy. He'd been gentle, passionate, and giving in bed. He hadn't "fucked" her like he had the others. He had loved her.

"Can we just stay like this?" She asked quietly, playing a finger down the length of his nose. Billy dropped his head and rubbed his hair into her ribs.

"Quinn." He half grunted-half moaned into her skin, his cheek pressed to her stomach. She couldn't help herself; she thought about it: the future, further than a few minutes from now. There was an end in sight, and as soon as she let her mind circle the idea, her chest hurt. It seemed Billy was in the same headspace, his breath falling across the flat plane of her belly in a sigh.

Maybe it was the silence that did her in. The quiet has a way of making things worse.

Stinging tears worked into the corners of her eyes, despite her hand on Billy's back. Quinn rubbed her thumb back and forth on his smooth, hot skin, letting tears fall down the sides of her face in silence. Terrible, heartbreaking silence.

"I never got it." Billy muttered suddenly, his voice vibrating through her. "Why a bastard like Bones ever had my ma." Quinn brought her second hand to his hair, brushing her fingers through it to soothe. But he caught it with one of his, weaving their fingers together.

"I remember her yellin' at him all the time. Cryin' and sayin' stuff like 'I don't know why I love ya, you bastard.'" Billy sighed again and Quinn wondered what his mother had been like. She must have been a strong woman to marry a gunrunner and a murderer. But then again, Quinn was shocked to realize she was in the same position. If given a choice, she would choose Billy again and again, an admitted killer and criminal.

"I get it." She whispered, stroking Billy's back. A smile crept over her lips despite the tears that continued rolling down her face.

"Yeah." He murmured, squeezing her hand in his. "I do too."

After a few minutes, Billy started to rub his cheek against her stomach. Then his rubbing included small kisses. Then there were sighs and caressing hands.

"I want you again." He groaned into her skin. Quinn felt a new blush rise in her cheeks. Sure enough, his lower body was moving between her legs, not in any pushy way, but subtly. She knew he was probably prone to pounce on her, even though he remained sweet and gentle.

"Already?" She said with a little laugh. It was hard not to feel a little embarrassed. She'd gone from having no sexual experience to feeling like a desirable seductress. She wasn't a virgin anymore.

The thought made her insides pool with warmth.

Quinn had lost her virginity to Billy Darley, and he wanted to take her again.

"I'd have you a hundred times if I could." His response was unexpected, quiet, and completely honest.

And it made her throat catch in a sob.

Quinn fought hard to stay quiet but it didn't matter. Billy's head lifted and she knew he could see her tears.

"Shit." He swore gently, pushing off the bed with his arms to climb up her body. Then in a swift movement, he had her in his arms. Before he spoke, she shook her head and wiped the trails from her cheeks.

"I'm sorry." She muttered, furious that her emotions had gotten the better of her. Just when he'd been completely open to her, she'd scared him back into being guarded.

"Don't say sorry ta me." He replied into hair. "I shouldna said that."

"No. It was perfect." Quinn sniffled the words into his chest, grasping at his shoulders to cloak herself in him. "I just know how much I'll miss you." Her heart hurt as the idea was verbally realized. No avoiding it now; the reality was there. She was never going to see Billy again after that night. "I envy your mother." Quinn half regretted the words as soon as she said them, a hiccup clipping the end of her sentence. Going completely still, Billy was like a statue against her, his hands locked on her body.

"Why." It wasn't a question really, but just a word hanging in the silence, a demand for her to continue.

"Isn't it obvious?" Quinn didn't wait for him to answer; she just acted. Her heart was a goner, and her mind was in shambles, but her body was alive. Throwing one arm around his neck, she fused their mouths and took her man.

Her man.

* * *

><p><strong>Don't worry, it doesn't end there. I just had to give myself a break! This chapter was getting ridiculous.<strong>

**Buh. Anywho, much love to leeseelee for inspiring this story to begin with, and to MGC for patiently pushing me onward. Sorry it took so long to write this. Love you all!  
><strong>


	9. Chapter 9

When they were together a second time, not a sound passed between them. It was hot, fast, and desperate. Quinn breathed hard into Billy's throat like she was running a mile, her body absorbing each of his blunt thrusts. Yet, despite the silence, she knew there was a lot going on in those moments. She was caught up in the futile desire for the afternoon to never end, wishing with all her might. And Billy…Quinn knew that with every kiss, his defenses were crumbling. His hands were on her face almost the entire time, letting her know he was staring at her, kissing her not because he felt obligated, but because he needed to.

It was frantic and perfect. And Quinn's heart broke when the climax came. Her body flooded with pleasure and warmth but her moan wasn't one of ecstasy. It was a whimpered plea that landed with a gasp. Billy's shuddering body peaked only moments after and his reply was a hard exhale and a soft sigh.

Then it was silence again. They weren't distant, but closer than ever. Quinn rested on Billy's ribs, fanning her hand out on his belly so she could feel him breathe. Up on the in, and down with the out. If she hadn't been so sated, she may have thought about how much she would miss lying with him. How much she would just miss him. Instead, she was asleep in under a minute, content to fall into a thoughtless doze.

* * *

><p>"I said I ain't sellin' today, get lost."<p>

She stirred slowly, the sound of Billy's voice fading in from nothing.

"Billy." Quinn reached out for him, her hand smoothing over sheets and pillow, but finding him nowhere. Rubbing her face, she gathered the sheet around her chest and pushed herself upright.

"I said fuck off!" Billy's voice snapped harshly through a barrier and Quinn realized he was outside the motel room. What she was hearing sounded like it was coming through the door. Listening hard, she waiting for another voice, or maybe a clue as to who else would be outside, but the door abruptly opened, causing her to jump and clutch the sheets tighter.

"Shit." Billy's tone was quieter as he closed the door. "Didn't mean ta wake ya." Quinn curled her legs up under her chin and shrugged.

"I'm not here to sleep all afternoon." She said softly, crossing her arms over her knees. "How long was I out?" A rustling of sheets and a lean on the mattress made her grin. Billy moved closer until she could the air whistling from his nose.

"Little under an hour." He whispered. Quinn's heart picked up at his voice. Dangerous, delicious, and teasing all at the same time. Extending her fingers, she brushed the stubbly edge of his jaw and prompted him closer without a word.

He was more than happy to obey. Billy kissed her with warm lips, a dark taste lingering when he pulled away.

"You had a cigarette." She murmured, grinning as Billy snorted back.

"After this afternoon, baby, I needed two." Quinn blushed a violent shade of red and flopped backwards on the bed, covering her face as Billy laughed.

"God, Billy." She giggled under the sheet. "You're terrible." His hands grasped her knees through the thin material and split them, allowing him to lurch over her. With a quick tug, he took the blanket away from her face…and then some. Quinn yelped as the sheet vanished from her chest before she managed to snatch it at her waist. "Billy!"

"What?" He purred, mouth landing on her collarbone, drifting between her breasts. Holding her breath, Quinn clutched the sheet for dear life, knowing that if it lowered any further they would be doing a lot more than kissing….again.

"Was that a customer?" She asked the question with the intention of distracting him. And it worked. With a grunt, Billy lifted his head.

"What do ya think?" He lowered his voice ever so slightly and Quinn knew he wasn't happy at the change of topic.

"I think if I let you, you'd…do things to me again." She tried to hide the wide grin on her face, but failed when Billy chuckled in the back of this throat.

"Do what things?" He growled. He lowered his hips, dragging them along her open thighs. Didn't matter that a bed sheet and a pair of jeans separated them, Quinn shivered. "You afraid ta say it out loud?"

Scoffing, Quinn crossed her arms.

"No! I'm not afraid."

"Okay, so say it." Billy rumbled, kissing her with a sinful nibble and tease of his tongue. "If I took this sheet off of you, we'd have sex again." Quinn moaned into his ear and her whole body shuddered. Simple and honest, but hot as hell.

"If you take off this sheet…" Quinn started but Billy's mouth opened on her pulse point, his tongue dipping to her skin and breaking her concentration. "…Billy…"

"Billy what?" He prompted, brushing her throat with his lips.

"We shouldn't do it again." She whispered weakly into his ear. Truly, she wasn't sure how all of this was going to toll on her body. So far she didn't feel terribly uncomfortable, but three times?

"Do what?" He teased with a laugh. Quinn's face bloomed with heat.

"Sex." The word sounded foreign on her tongue, but Billy's sigh on her throat made her feel anything but awkward.

"Yes." He grunted. "Sex, yes." Quinn laughed and weaved her fingers in his hair.

"You're setting me up for failure, you know." She murmured. Billy slowed his lustful kisses and raised his head.

"What?" Blushing a little, Quinn tugged on the sheet despite the fact that Billy had it pinned beneath his body. "What does that mean?"

"Can I…cover up?" She blushed harder from embarrassment and guilt. If she had let him, Billy would have gone on making love to her all afternoon. But her stupid, big mouth wasn't going to let that happen, was it?

"No." He wasn't mean, or even bossy when he answered. Billy kissed her mouth soundly before repeating the gesture with each of her nipples. "I like ya this way."

"What way is that?" She asked, rubbing his soft hair. There was something about the way it flowed between her fingers. It tickled and yet felt so comforting at the same time.

"No. I asked first." Billy grunted, shuffling up her body further so their faces were only inches apart. "How am I settin' ya up for failure?" Quinn played with his hair a little longer, hoping he'd forget she'd spoken. But his silence won out.

"Being with anyone else will never be better than being with you." She turned her face away in hopes that the sadness in her chest would dissipate. It didn't. Billy ghosted a simple kiss on her temple after a moment.

"I like seein' ya smilin', naked, and under me." He whispered into her ear. Quinn closed her eyes and fought back the sadness with all her might. "Stay with me, right here and now." Billy added, stroking her cheek with a finger. Turning her head back, she touched his face to read him. He wasn't sad, or happy. He was both and neither. Exactly as she.

"I'd stay with you for much longer if you'd let me." She whispered.

"Quinn…" He murmured.

"If you want me, why can't I stay with you? It's my choice…" Quinn wanted to shake him by the ears and show him. Even if she didn't live past thirty, it'd be worth having Billy everyday. There was no mistaking their connection. They were so opposite one another, but they needed each other with a great ferocity.

"I may be a selfish bastard, Quinn. But I'm gonna condemn ya to my life. You've got a fuckin' nice future ahead of ya." Billy had lifted himself entirely off her now, her chest cold without his body heat on top of her. Pulling the sheet back in place, Quinn sat up against the headboard.

"What about you?" She answered. "So your future is already set? Drugs and tattoos and sleeping around for the rest of your life? That's it? No hope for change?"

"Quinn, we've already talked about this." He sounded tired, not angry. In his reluctance, Quinn felt a sliver of hope.

"No, you talked." She muttered, gripping the sheet at her chest. "You told me about the murder and the meeting tomorrow. But what if you didn't go?"

"Goddamn it, Quinn." Billy sighed and she knew she'd lost. Part of Billy would never want to leave the life he had. She just knew it. He'd lived it too much already. He was young and foolish, reveling in the newfound power in his grasp. The other part, the Billy that was hidden deep down, was no match for its opponent. He would always be the criminal he was bred to be.

"I won't be able to do it." She held in another cry, too desperate to succumb to weeping again so easily. A determination in her was fighting for him, searching for a way to keep him. "Missing you drove me insane." Her voice cut off as an inevitable sob choked her.

"You have to." Billy sat beside her on the bed, the mattress tipping her closer. "I will only hurt ya more in the long run."

"That's not fair." She whispered, wiping her cheeks in a huff.

"No one said this shit is fair." He brushed her face with his hand and she leant away.

"I have to just forget you. Forget all of this." She grabbed at the sheet and wrapped it under her arms, lurching towards the edge of the mattress. "I can't even have a proper breakup because there was nothing to break up. I'm just another…" Standing haphazardly from the bed, she tugged the sheet around her body. "…notch on your belt."

"Really?" Billy barked loud enough to make her jump in surprise. "Ya wanna be that way?" His weight left the groaning mattress. "Ya wanna act like ya didn't know **exactly** what you were doin'?"

Quinn blushed and turned her face away.

"You wanted this!" Billy hissed. "You wanted in and you got it." Her lip trembled and she bit it with self-loathing. She had wanted in, despite his ultimatum. She'd wanted Billy, all of him. "And I told ya…" Billy's voice grew close and she shrank away again, wishing she had her clothes. But his hand wrapped around her upper arm, pulling her to his chest. "…I told ya we would be done tomorrow."

"Done." She muttered bitterly, leaning from him. Quinn didn't want their last words to be angry, but that was what she felt. Anger. Billy was breaking her heart and giving her no chance to try and save it. "Just like the rest of the trash, I guess."

"Don't twist my words." Billy growled into her ear. "Ya know you aren't—"

"If you're going to say 'like the rest', you might as well save your breath." Quinn muttered, trying her best to ignore the comforting feel of his chin at her cheek. She belonged in his arms, her back to his chest like it was now. They were perfect this way.

"Ya aren't." He said it anyway. "And ya know it's true."

Quinn fought a round of weak tears. It was that easy. Billy could recite clichés to her and she would regard them as poetry. But maybe it was more than just a tired line. Quinn knew Billy was being honest with her. From the heartbeat against her shoulder blades to the hushed tone of his voice, she could feel his sincerity. She wasn't another one of his conquests, the same way he wasn't just a first love. Billy Darley was going to be **the** love. She knew that now the same way she'd known weeks ago, when he'd held her close in the freezing ocean.

"So how does this work?" She whispered, their hands weaving together in the sheet around her body. "You'll ignore me, even if we bump into each other?"

"We won't bump into each other." Again his voice was soft, not angry. Numb but sad. Quinn nodded and the silence fell again. She thought about going home and telling her parents why she'd left school. She thought about school, walking through the halls. The days of her simple life were over. She would know heartbreak, longing, despair…she would confront all these things as her memories plagued her.

Suddenly she was remembering that day, all those weeks ago. She remembered the heat of summer and the joy of a solitary walk home from school. Her body gave a shudder as her mind sunk deep into that memory.

"What?" Billy was there in her ear, his concern subtle but present in his tone. Leaning back, she rested her head in the curve of his shoulder, closing her eyes.

"I'm just remembering that first day in the alley." His arms tightened and Quinn's urge to cry returned. "If only I'd known—"

"I'll drive ya home." Billy didn't release her immediately, but his touch slipped away as abruptly as the change in subject. And Quinn knew why. They both knew why. It didn't matter.

* * *

><p>She showered and dressed in his bathroom. There weren't any tears, but robotic movements and numb thoughts. Quinn went through the motions until she was wrinkled like a prune and smelled like Dial.<p>

And then she came out and they left without a word.

She listened as he started the car.  
>She waited as he pulled it around to the motel's door.<br>She sat.  
>She buckled her seatbelt.<br>She felt the car rumble beneath her.  
>She smelled the remnants of beer, men's deodorant and cigarettes.<p>

They drove in silence and Quinn just existed, barely breathing.

It was obvious when they were in her neighborhood, because Billy shifted uncomfortably in his seat. He fidgeted away from her towards his window, his defenses up in full force. The real Billy was hidden away, possibly forever. And now Quinn was being escorted home by a shell.

Maybe it would have been better if he'd just called her a cab. Yet when he slowed to a stop, she knew a cab would have robbed them of this last moment. It took a minute of thinking, an awkward exchange of nothing, until Quinn spoke.

"Can I ask for something?"

Billy's sigh was quick, like an exhausted snort. "Depends."

Leaning over the divide between them, Quinn placed a soft kiss on his cheek. From there she whispered.

"Grow old."

His silence was all the answer she needed. And before she could cry, Quinn kissed his cheek for the last time and slid out of the car. His scent lingered then dissipated, like she hoped her pain would. She breathed in the crisp air in preparation.

Then she walked to her front door alone.


	10. Epilogue

_5 Years Later_

* * *

><p>There wasn't a whole lot to look at as Billy walked the streets downtown that day. And he didn't know what it was that had brought his attention up from the lines in the sidewalk. A sixth sense maybe. Or perhaps it was fate's way of kicking him in the balls. All he knew was this: he would have missed her if he hadn't looked up at the exact moment he had. And those precious seconds had taken the air from his lungs.<p>

Shit, that single glance had nearly taken him headfirst into the sidewalk. One minute he'd been looking down at his lighter, directing the flame to the tip of his cigarette, and the next he'd glanced up into the crowd.

Her hair. That was what put her out against the people on the sidewalk. The sun hit it just right and there was red gleaming from the dark brown. He would recognize that head of hair anywhere. He remembered running it through his fingers, kissing it, burying his nose in it.

Then he'd seen her face. Billy had never been stabbed, not yet anyway, but he imagined it couldn't feel much worse than that. His breath had slammed from his chest, his heart had screamed, and worse, his entire body had run cold.

Quinn. Her name was a treasure and a curse. It was the one word that brought him fierce pleasure and searing pain. She was his one true weakness. She'd taken him to the bone, marked him for life, and then let him go.

Seeing her was like jamming a fork in his ribs. Those grey eyes looked right at him, passed over his face and moved on without a single glitch of feeling. He didn't exist in her world. Not anymore.

Billy fought to swallow, to maintain his presence. He was, after all, on a busy street with a reputation to uphold.

"Billy?"

Her voice broke him, then and there. Shattered what little of a soul he had left and hauled the pieces away. His shoulders stiffened and he took a drag on his cigarette until the smoke burned through him. At least the pain in his body matched the pain in his heart.

She'd stopped on the sidewalk. He could see her reflection on the storefront windows beside him. Her words had been feather light and barely audible; but, then again, they'd only been meant for his ears. No one knew why the blind girl had frozen on the curb. They just went around, giving her not a second thought. But Billy slowed, watched her, taking his time as he continued to strut away.

It would have to be enough. Her voice, whispering his name, would have to last him for the rest of his life. Because he wasn't going to stop her.

Billy blinked, closing his eyes for a second.

For a moment, he let himself remember it all. He let himself hurt. He let himself miss her.

Then he hissed out his smoke.

And kept on walking.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: **So, this is it. I finally wrote an ending I liked, and I finished it. I'm so sorry it took so long, and I hope I didn't wreck you all too much. Thank you for all the support. And I hope you liked the ending.


	11. The End

That night, she'd had a dream. Long before the morning, or the events of the day, she'd tossed and turned in sleep.

* * *

><p>She was in a house. Not a house, her house. A pretty brick house, old Boston but new build. Their house. It was late, and she was sitting alone inside, listening to the sounds of the street. They lived close enough to her old childhood home that she could almost pretend she was sitting on her parent's back stoop, waiting for him like she used to. Like she had for so many years.<p>

"Baby." His voice felt like a gunshot in her ears, despite the fact that he was outside. Faintly, she could hear his shoes scraping on the sidewalk. "Baby." His tone was wrong. That name was reserved for moments of weakness, like when he was wrapped around her, breathing her in. Not when he was strolling up the front lawn.

"Billy?" She was up and moving to the door in a bolt. "Billy, what's wrong?" His steps had stopped and she threw open the screen door to reach for him. His shirt was wet, and she knew from the smell it wasn't water.

"Help me." He was wheezing badly, his words formed in gasps, not deep throaty growls from his chest.

"Billy what happened?" She felt for his face and nestled his jaw into her palms. He was scruffy and unshaven, his cheek rasping on her skin. "Billy…"

"Help me." His voice was desperate and sad, pulling at her heart.

"Come inside!" She moved to let him pass, but he didn't enter. He didn't shift an inch on the stoop. "Billy—"

"Quinn." His voice cracked in a way she had never heard. "Quinn I love you."

"Billy…" She reached for his face again, and her hand came back slick. "Oh my god your face is bleeding…"

"I was wrong." He was crying. There was no other way to describe the broken sounds coming from his lips. "I was afraid."

"What are you talking about?" She was groping for his wounds, trying to find the source of the hot blood on her hands. "Billy come inside I need to—"

"I should have never let you go." His hands were on her face now, his big fingers swallowing up her cheeks. She felt so small when he did that, cradling her in his palms. "I'm sorry."

"Billy." She couldn't breathe, the pain in his voice breaking her in two. "I'm right here. Stop talking like that and come in the house…I've got bandages…"

"I should have run with you." He whispered. "I wish I'd run with you."

She couldn't reply anymore, her chest tight with sobs she refused to let out. All she could do was search his face, look for an answer.

"I love you." He was saying it again. The three words she could barely ever get out of him. He was spouting them easily now.

"Billy, what happened?"

"What I always knew would happen." Billy murmured, his lips finding her forehead. She'd inched so close to him, her arms wrapped around him in a desperate embrace. She wasn't aware she'd even moved.

"Stop it." She shook from head to toe, her body seizing in fear. "I'll take care of you, come inside."

"Quinn." She took a step back when his voice turned soft. "It's too late for that."

* * *

><p>She woke with a strangled cry, her arms clutching a pillow so hard they were cramping in pain.<p>

"BILLY!" She screamed for him, even though part of her knew he wasn't there. That it was all a dream. Part of her knew it wasn't real.

And yet.

The phone rang when she was showering for work. Her husband, calling from Toledo. He was at a presentation about teleconference technology and applications, but he'd seen the news. For some reason, Boston had made the news in Ohio. Then again, the violent deaths of almost a dozen people will do that.

White-collar Father Turns Homicidal in Deep South Boston!

What a headline. She wouldn't confront the ache in her gut as she listened to the story on the news. Not until they started to get names from police. That was around dinnertime. She'd been to work, yet achieved nothing in her office at the University. Students had come in and gone, asking questions and handing in papers, but she'd registered none of it. Not really. Because her mind had been in South Boston all day, waiting desperately on a back stoop for a man she needed to know was alive.

They read the names in the tone reporters reserved for criminals. No inflection of pity or emotion, just a list of dead men the world was better off without. Quinn had held her breath in fear. But she'd known long before she heard.

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** So I recently binged on the new Daredevil show on Netflix [if you haven't watched it, it's fantastic] and it struck me how similar Quinn was to Matt Murdock. Now, she's no superhero, hearing people blocks away. But she has talent in hearing things people usually can't...which made me miss Quinn. She was a cool character. Then I watched how Matt Murdock felt his father's face after an especially nasty fight and I thought...what would Quinn have felt on Billy's last day? Thus, this was born. Hope you don't hate me...too much. Thanks for reading!


End file.
